Hi I'm thinking of purchasing this program. I have significant guilt and because of it anxiety and depression too.
Can someone please tell about Session 9. It is well done? and heavy weight? with respect to handling guilt? I've already read enough about guilt on the internet. I need good techniques and methods to get over this.
Tell Me about Session 9 - Guilt
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Guest
I will say that this whole program is wonderfull, and teaches us how to think and feel in a positive way about ourselves. The sessions all work off each other. It has to be done from start to finish to benefit you in all aspects of your life. It's not a quick fix and we get out of it what we put into it. I too like many here had a lot of guilt (I carried for 40 plus years) and after 3 months am doing so much better, have learned how to deal with the guilt and stop beating myself up over and over for past issues I can't undo. This gives you the skills to help yourself gain control over your anxiety, depression, panic, and guilty thoughts and feelings. It's worth every penny if you want to enjoy the rest of your life.
Good Luck!!
Good Luck!!
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Guest
wallyv
I just completed my week of Session 9. I agree with Monty's Mom that you really need to complete the whole program...so remember if/when you purchase it to resist the urge to skip right to Session 9.
That being said...Session 9 focus on guilt and worry. Basically it boils down to the fact that guilt and worry are used as avoidance. For example, if I am overweight I may feel guilty when over eating or eating foods I know to be bad for my health. Instead of actually DOING something about this (ie, changing my diet, exercise, joining a gym, dealing with emotional reasons behind my over eating), I just feel guilty. If I am skilled at feeling guilty (which all of us here typically are), I will feel SO guilty, that it will replace any positive actions. As long as I hold onto my extreme guilt...I've excused myself from actually doing anything about it.
Session 9 will give you assignments and exercises to help you deal with your guilt. You will begin to disect your guilt/worry into the 'reasonable' and the 'unreasonable' (and by this point in the program you will see the difference). After that, you will give yourself forgiveness for those 'reasonable' guilt/worry items which are past their due date (in other words, nothing can be done about them...there is no one to apologize to, no action to be taken...all that is left is forgiveness of self). After that, you deal with those guilt/worry issues that may require you confronting someone or some situation. You will put together a plan to bring closure to the issue.
In a nutshell, that is Session 9. Again, Monty's Mom is right..it is imperative that you complete the Sessions in order and do not rush through them just to get to Session 9. They are all valuable. You gradually built the self-confidence needed to effectively complete Session 9.
Good luck and I hope this information is helpful to you.
Goodwillchic
I just completed my week of Session 9. I agree with Monty's Mom that you really need to complete the whole program...so remember if/when you purchase it to resist the urge to skip right to Session 9.
That being said...Session 9 focus on guilt and worry. Basically it boils down to the fact that guilt and worry are used as avoidance. For example, if I am overweight I may feel guilty when over eating or eating foods I know to be bad for my health. Instead of actually DOING something about this (ie, changing my diet, exercise, joining a gym, dealing with emotional reasons behind my over eating), I just feel guilty. If I am skilled at feeling guilty (which all of us here typically are), I will feel SO guilty, that it will replace any positive actions. As long as I hold onto my extreme guilt...I've excused myself from actually doing anything about it.
Session 9 will give you assignments and exercises to help you deal with your guilt. You will begin to disect your guilt/worry into the 'reasonable' and the 'unreasonable' (and by this point in the program you will see the difference). After that, you will give yourself forgiveness for those 'reasonable' guilt/worry items which are past their due date (in other words, nothing can be done about them...there is no one to apologize to, no action to be taken...all that is left is forgiveness of self). After that, you deal with those guilt/worry issues that may require you confronting someone or some situation. You will put together a plan to bring closure to the issue.
In a nutshell, that is Session 9. Again, Monty's Mom is right..it is imperative that you complete the Sessions in order and do not rush through them just to get to Session 9. They are all valuable. You gradually built the self-confidence needed to effectively complete Session 9.
Good luck and I hope this information is helpful to you.
Goodwillchic
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Guest
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Guest
Yes! From Session 1 and throughout you will be taught how to be gentle with yourself. You will learn to replace your negative and sometimes hateful self-talk with compassion and forgiveness. It's not easy and at first you won't buy it...but that's okay, because as Lucinda will remind you again and again: when you have been practicing negativity, worry and guilt your whole life...it takes time to reverse the habit of pessimism and perfectionism.
I don't know if you are familiar with AA, but I had the priviledge of attending a few open meetings before I started Lucinda's program and I'm sure it made all the difference for me. They have a saying about the 12 steps "if you work it, it works" and it is the same way for this program. You don't have to do it perfectly, but you DO HAVE TO DO IT...meaning listen to the tapes regularly, do the homework assignments, and don't give up. If you work the program, it'll work for you.
Plus, keep coming to this community. The people here are wonderful and it helps to know there are other people out there dealing with the same issues. We are in this together
I don't know if you are familiar with AA, but I had the priviledge of attending a few open meetings before I started Lucinda's program and I'm sure it made all the difference for me. They have a saying about the 12 steps "if you work it, it works" and it is the same way for this program. You don't have to do it perfectly, but you DO HAVE TO DO IT...meaning listen to the tapes regularly, do the homework assignments, and don't give up. If you work the program, it'll work for you.
Plus, keep coming to this community. The people here are wonderful and it helps to know there are other people out there dealing with the same issues. We are in this together
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Guest
I have just gone though Session 9 and have to admit this was a difficult one for me. Like many of you who have written, I struggled with guilt over things done in the past and have had trouble forgiving myself and letting it go. I am a Christian and know on a cognitive level that God has forgiven me but self-forgiveness has been an ache in my heart. The self-hatred and negative self-talk have done a real number on me and I am sure that it is the main cause of my anxiety. I did the assignment Lucinda gave about making a list of people I need to forgive and things I need to forgive myself for. Funny, it was easier to forgive others. Lucinda was right on target about the things we say to ourselves and I am now changing that self-talk to what she suggested about "I am a good person and I deserve to be happy..." I have also been praying that I will truly feel the forgiveness I know God offers freely. I know that if I don't forgive myself I am being arrogant towards God and that is not my intention. I want to feel free of this anxiety and enjoy my life. I also realized just how much I worry about that never comes to pass. I just needed to vent and say thanks to any who read this. Please pray that I will finally find the peace I am so desperately searching for in my soul. Thank you Lucinda for forcing me, through this program, to acknowledge the truth of what really troubles me and for providing the tools to cope and overcome! Thank you again to those on this support line who constantly encourage and support one another. God bless you.
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Guest
Dinobail,
It sounds like you are on the right path and I will pray that you find it in your heart to forgive yourself. Maybe it would help to ask, "If I were on the other end of this situation, would I want the person to still be feeling guilty?" Probably not. Anyway, we are here for you and you will be in my prayers.
Goodwillchic
It sounds like you are on the right path and I will pray that you find it in your heart to forgive yourself. Maybe it would help to ask, "If I were on the other end of this situation, would I want the person to still be feeling guilty?" Probably not. Anyway, we are here for you and you will be in my prayers.
Goodwillchic
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Guest
Session 9 was intense for me, as well!