I feel guilty living with my boyfriend

Are you needlessly dragging around a one-ton bag of guilt and worry? Here are some techniques that help reduce guilt and worry in your life to produce dramatic, immediate changes.
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tina20
Posts: 31
Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2008 8:33 pm

Post by tina20 » Thu Apr 10, 2008 12:05 am

<span class="ev_code_RED">I feel guilty about my parents, because I can't help them out more. Plus, I moved out of my moms house when she was sick so I could be with my boyfriend. Now I'm scared of karma!!!! I love my parents, but I love my boyfriend too. He's the only person that keeps me sane. But I just constantly feel guilty living with him. </span>

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 1:23 am

<span class="ev_code_RED">thank you for the advice. But its hard cuz my mom lives far away from me now, and I miss her a bunch.</span>

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 1:41 am

Tina you can be a great daughter and an independent person as well.....you can love and support her in many ways other than just living with her. Call and say hi often. Write little notes and send them in the mail saying your thinking of her....Moms love that. Keep yourslef in touch with her and show her you care and that your happy and enjoying your life. Most Moms and Dads for that matter want thier children to grow up to be Happy...so tell them you are tell them you care tell them you think of them often and if you can squeeze a visit in every now and then you are being a great daughter.

Dont feel guilty to be happy. Thats not what your parents would want from you!

The lesson on assertive behaivor is a great one for you to really absorb.
Happy Times to you
Dodger

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 1:56 am

<span class="ev_code_RED">thank you for the reply. I really appricate it. Im just worried somthing bad is gonna happen to me and my mom won't be there. Idk I'm just a really negative thinker. I always think the worst. I grew up in a close family so its just really hard.</span>

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:13 am

it sounds like your experiencing more than guilt. it sounds like fear, too.

maybe you can write out what you are afraid of. then look at the list and turn the negatives into positives.
if your list is really long--and you don't want to do this for each fear: you can identify themes and turn these negatives into positives.

:?also, i'm thinkin', even though you love your boyfriend, maybe it's not good for you to be there right now :eek:. maybe there are other reasons, besides being away from your parents, that make you uncomfortable with your living situation.

this is tough. i've moved around so much, people who've known me for years think i'll never stay still.

a lot of my difficulty in considering a home has been complicated by my relationship with my parents :( --so i really feel for ya. i haven't figured it out--but i'm looking to move forward :) and not back. . . that much is clear :).

i hope this helps! :)

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:33 am

<span class="ev_code_RED">I have moved over 6 times in the 20 years I've been alive. I know what its like to move around. I think that may have somthing to do with my anxiety. Thank you for the advice. but I just really miss my family.</span>

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:38 am

you're welcome. have you tried chat? folks on there help me when I just "want my mama" - but she can't really help.

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:57 am

It is easy to feel like crap and blame it on someone else.. dont forget you are your own safe person! I PMed you about this too!

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Apr 10, 2008 3:23 am

<span class="ev_code_RED">thanks for the replies..its nice talking to somebody about my stress</span>
Last edited by tina20 on Thu Apr 10, 2008 3:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

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