my problem

Emmas_Mommy · Post by **Emmas_Mommy** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 5:37 pm

For the past two years I have been praying for one thing and it isn't anything extravagent. All I am asking for is one friend that is it. I have been living in the city that I am in for 2 years and I do not have any friends. I just want a christian friend. I litrally cry out to God almost daily asking for a friend. Someone to go shopping with, to talk to on the phone, someone to tell my problems to or to tell about the good things to.
The only people I have to talk to are my parents. I cant tell them if somthing is bothering me. They are so busy that I don't usually talk to them but 5 minutes a day. They are always quoteing the scripture to me "If you want friends show yourself friendly". Well I'm friendly. I walk through stores and talk to people I ask women that I go to church with to do things with me but they don't. I am always complimenting people trying to help others but, still no friend. I am to a point now where I cant look at people while talking to them. I have a lot of confidence in my self but it seem like people dont like something about me. I wish I knew what it was. People always say I am funny and nice and pretty. So what is my problem. Why am I not alowed to have a friend?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:36 pm

Hey Emmas_Mommy,
I cannot help you except to say I know what you are talking about. I have no "friends". I have acquaintences, but no real friends and never have. One, I do not know how to be a friend. I think I scare people off with trying too hard. Two, my therapist says I pick the wrong type of people to be a friend and they just are not able to meet my expectations. But I am hoping and praying this program helps me to love me enough that I do not "need" people and can then begin to share with others in a more healthy way. Whatever that is. At least know you are not alone and we can learn together.

AD1973 · Post by **AD1973** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:57 pm

Hi Emmas-Mommy, I won't be able to go shopping or go to church with you but I can be here to to listen & to write to for now. I do understand about how you don't understand why you can find a friend...I feel the same...I wonder sometimes about why is it so hard to have friends? One of my fears is Social Phobia...It is so hard for me to make friends and that is why i have fears to go to parties, or any kind of Friend or even family gatherings. I get nervous and anxious & I just feel like I never fit in. But it's nice that we have this kind of Web Gathering & it's not that Intimidating I guess since I don't have to talk or do anything but just write & no one will judge me I guess. But hopefully this kind of Web Chatting will help you feel better for now until you find someone in person.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 1:53 am

EMMAS MOM,
I JUST STARTED THE PROGRAM BECAUSEB I AM CLAUSTROPHOBIC BUT TRY BEING A FRIEND TO OTHRS BY TAKING THE FOCUS OFF OF YOU. BY THIS I MEAN IF YOU DO THINGS FOR OTHERS YOU ARE NOT JUST BEING CONSIDERATE BUT REFOUSNG TOO. YOU CAN START BY DOING THINGS AT YOUR CHURCH. AT LEAST YOU WILL FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING GOOD THIS WEB SITE IS A GOOD PLACE TO PRACTICE. YOU SHOULD COME HERE DAILY ANYWAY. YOU WILL HELP YOURSELF AT THE SAME TIME. BEING AND HAVING A FRIEND IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD HAVE TO WORK AT. YOU ALREADY HAVE FRIENDS BY COMING HERE. DEB

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 2:34 am

I will be your friend. I am sending you a <<<<<<<BIG HUG>>>>>>>> can ya feel it?! I will talk to you on the phone too if you want. Perhaps I can meet you someday. Are you anywhere near Middlesboro?
Babz

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 4:25 am

I don't live near Middlesboro Babz. I live in Pike County.I have always been active in Church from giving out clothes and food. I use to go with my dad to the hospital and jail to sing and pray with people. My dad is the pastor of the church I was raised in. I helped lead praise and worship there as well. I have always been very active. Since I moved to this area 2 1/2 years ago and started the church that I am in. I havent been given the oppertunity to do anything really and now I just dont have the time and would be useless. I have a 9 month old daughter so I would just have to take care of her.
I had several friends before but they are no longer the type of people you would want to be around. They are almost all on drugs now or they drink a lot and use horiable language and that type of behavior makes me angry and uncomfortable plus I do not allow people who do these thing around my daughter. She comes first. This sounds awful but I am so glad that I am not the only one on here who has a problem with making friends I usually read these posts from people talking about how supportive there friends and family are. I just dont understand how people can be depressed with support. I am very happy that I have all of you to talk to it has helped me so much this past month.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 6:11 am

Hi Emmas-Mommy, I am very happy to hear that you know that you have friends here on this web site. You can always find comfort & support with us. We will get through this together, you'll see. You just have to have Faith & Believe! This is hard but it's not impossible to conquer. We will overcome this.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri Jan 02, 2009 7:14 pm

Hi, I'm an Emma's mommy too. My Emma is nine. We live way out in the country and it's really hard to have any kind of functioning friendships out here. I get really lonely too. I know what it's like to really want someone to just hang out with that can actually give you a hug or a shoulder to cry on if you need it. But, most of my best friends are ones I only talk to on the phone or email becuase of my location. I'd love to be your friend too. How old is your Emma?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:25 pm

At this point Emma I would be humble to have parents just to talk too. I live in Michigan with no family and no friends. I have tried desperately to make friends but have had no luck. I have 2 little girls here and God had been our supplier, our friend and our comforter. Sometimes when put in a situation in life where we have to rely soley on him...

Blessings Always

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jan 21, 2009 7:11 pm

Hey there...I know what you feel like thinking you have no friends. Have you ever thought, it could be because we are so picky about the type of people we want to be friends with???? And, that is a good thing...I would rather have no friends, as thousands of so-called friends...or people we have absolutely nothing in common with...I am sure people really do like you, but, I guess they sense you are have better morals than most of them...I am from Ky...too, so you are not alone...Maybe, we can talk again...God Bless You...and, you are never alone...You are 1 unique person, and because not everyone is as unique as you; they just don't know how to be your friend....You should be so proud...By the way, my dad was a minister...Hope you get a chance to read this, because I really do understand and care....