Anxiety with church & related activities

Shifrah · Post by **Shifrah** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 1:56 pm

I was curious do other Christians have these types of issues:

+ not wanting to sit in the middle of the row or in the front of the congregation/having to sit in the aisle seat, sometimes arriving early to make sure you aren't enclosed in a row so you can't get out during the service.

+ sometimes feeling like you have to run out to the bathroom in the middle of the sermon, and counting the minutes until the end, not wanting to leave in the middle in front of everyone.

+ not wanting to pray out loud or publicly in front of others

+ not wanting to join a small group or other prayer groups because you feel uncomfortable and anxious talking/praying in front of others or having to get up to use the bathroom several times

+ feeling like a 'bad Christian' because of your anxieties/inhibitions about all of the above.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 3:32 pm

wow all that sounds like me - not so much counting the seconds anymore but i know i must drive my wife crazy with the seat selection thing - a couple of months ago someone offered me a seat in the middle of the row - i felt so bad for my response i later emailed them and try to explain but still felt bad about it - not to add anything to your repetuer of fears but prayer circles make me crazy - i feel like i must be demon possesed sometimes to have that type of reaction to a group prayer but i realize now it's just the way i perceive it subconciously - i have started this church about 5 yrs. ago and the first month of goin gto this church was such a challange i consider it a miracle that i made it all the way through the service and sunday school that 1st visit - i did join a small group and i did leave the 1st one early and left one early a while after when i had trouble finding a new doctor in town and had no meds for awhile just to let you know that you aren't alone

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:12 pm

shifrah, I have even stopped going to church because of social phobia. I would get huge panic attacks sitting in church, even for such things as Christmas plays and Christian comedian routines. That is one of the reasons I'm really serious about going through the program here. I really miss going to church, we have a super praise and worship, great teaching, super great body of local believers and this anxiety I get at church is robbing me of an annoited time with other christians who get together each week to worship God. I also get very clausterphobic in the front rows, middle of rows, even being in a building with lots of other people. I have also kept an eye on the clock hoping the service would be over on time so I could split. Getting tongue tied if asked to pray, anxiety being in front of people or the focus of a groups attention, feeling deficient as a christian because I can't handle going to church I have also experienced. But praise God I am on the way to recovery by applying the tools I'm going to learn in this program. I really and excited and very hopeful I can attend church, go to jury duty, renew my drivers license, even shop at the grocery store and be at peace, relaxed and enjoy the experience for once. I do hope this encourages you and stimulates you to get free of this awful condition.

fellow sufferer.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:22 pm

Thanks for relating. Yes, I got extremely anxious during a couple of plays at a church, and couldn't leave because the actors used the aisles as part of the play. I felt sick to my stomach during the plays and couldn't even enjoy them. I don't like sitting in audiences for some reason either. I remember when I was dating my husband, we had to leave a comedy club because I was sick from not wanting to get up to go to the bathroom, for fear of the comedian heckling me! It can get so aggravating.

I hope to get the program soon, I put one of Lucinda's books on hold at the library. Finances!

mtnbkr, I'm also in Colorado, I'm in the Springs.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:25 pm

I have a problem with church too regarding codependency. I keep taking on new tasks for my church. The recorded music ministry, setting up a website, assisting with mailings, helping to set up, and being the last one to lock the gate. Then I give all the members of our small group a nice Christmas present, and all I get is a card, a candy cane, and a pencil! At the time I enjoy the giving, but after I'm resentful of the inequity of the giving. <span class="ev_code_RED">Does anyone have some experience, strength and hope, in learning not to give too much to one's church or circle of friends?</span>

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:28 pm

I wanted to add that I was starting to skip church on some Sundays because of anxiety. I felt that I would not be able to walk in the church in front of all the people without falling over something or getting lightheaded and passing out, or possibly anything that comes to mind! I was so nervous so I skipped some Sundays because of it, and my family and my husband encouraged me to go anyway and that I would be alright and I was, but sometimes I would sit in there and get so scared and I would pray and hope that I would not have a severe attack. It will get better for you, I promise! It did for me!

cindylou · Post by **cindylou** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:36 pm

Sometimes I do skip church, if I know that my intestines are going to act up. I used to just go and then deal with anxiety in Church but my DH knows that if I am miserable what's the point when I can't get anything out of the sermon.

P.S. Just wanted to add, this situation is the same at movie theaters or any kind of an 'audience', not just church.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:38 pm

church is an automatic anxiety for just about everyone. at least I'm thinking most of us go to repent. so, as soon as you enter the doors shouldn't you feel a little something something. I know I do. and sitting in the end seat...just my kind of statement. I don't even have to get up to go to the bathroom, but I have a need to sit there. especially in a new church. I seem to go to church throughout my life, but never just one. I personally think that sitting in the isle seat for me is anxiety. Not for depression purpouses or a mental issue. Just a nervouse tick. I have a problem sitting in a balcony too. Not that I can't but just when I am introduced to a new church. session one and two talk a little about those fears. How I deal with them is to do them. I don't avoid sitting someplace else and sometimes I have an assigned seat I go to every time. You seem to me sir to have what I call a minor seatuation. haha

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 4:47 pm

I have the same problems with church too! Ours is a small church but we are going in members. I haven't been for awhile but my Husband and child go without me. I feel bad about it but I'm hoping to go back. Just feeling like being part of something would be great! I also can not sit in the middle of the rows! Just in case I need to leave. I can't stand feeling like I'm trapped. I just envision myself trampling over everyone with my arms in the air going ahhhh!! The services that we belong to are also atleast a good hr. long. Which seems longer than that. I don't do good in situations where I can not move around freely. Like sitting at meetings, things where it would not be normal for me to get up and move around. I tend to have this horrible habit of swaying! I wouldn't be good at a wedding ceremony while someone was taping it, they would see this one person swaying back and forth in it! haha
Hopefully I will get back on track and the whole family can be seen in church together and yes I do feel guilty.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 5:24 pm

I attend a small local church, also...I used to always have a need to sit in the back near the door (exit)....I suffered severe panic attacks in any social setting...I continued attending church; in the meantime, I ordered the Attack and Anxiety course...I did the work, and worked really hard on replacing my negative thoughts with more truthful, realistic thoughts. Next, I began to take action...Sometime, after riding out a few of those panic attacks, and using positive self talk to calm myself down, I finally conquered the fear of the panic attacks.
I no longer have the panic attacks in my church.
I still have some anxiety with the prayer circle, at least I think it is anxiety (an off-balance) feeling, so, I just kneel and pray..I do have inner ear problems, so, this may be what is causing the off-balance feelings...I just feel the need to kneel down, and talk in earnest to the Lord...It really helps...I do have a lot of stressors in my life, so, when I look back to where I was just a few months after completing the course; I just can't believe how far I have come. I know the Good Lord helped me find this program, and I give Him all the credit for what He has brought me from...By the way, for a few years I was totally housebound with these attacks, and they began when I was only 22 years old. I have experienced every symptom imaginable, and I have made it...If I can, so, can you. And, yes, I sure had a lot of negative thoughts about the program, and often wondered if I was fighting a losing battle...But, I could not continue living another day in that misery, so, I ordered the program, and did the work. What did I have to lose? I had no life...All I lost was my panic attacks...Thank God For Miracles!!!!