Post
by Guest » Sun Apr 12, 2009 12:03 pm
Hi,
I didn't have time to read through everyone's responses, but with my experiences with such great and faithful people on this board, and I am certain you got very great and loving responses.
I could say so much, but I posted my story further down on this message board called "The Cross". It's about the darkest hours of my life, and how God showed me later that He was with me even when I didn't think He was. He had given me the sign I prayed for, but I didn't see it at the time. I saw it much later, and it was just this great learning experience. I hope that that is some kind of comfort for you.
I understand why you want signs, and I firmly believe that God gives us signs. However, sometimes we really miss the signs. This week, I feel that I said goodbye to an acquaintance who is preparing to die after a long battle with leukemia. She did all she could including a bone marrow transplant, she seemed to be well, and the leukemia seems to have come back even stronger. She's tired, and she may only have weeks to live. Even during this dark time, I cab see that God is with her, and she knows that too. I guess what I am trying to say is that perhaps your being alive is the miracle and sign. We so often just take for granted the fact that when we are walking, living, and breathing that that is the sign from God, his gift to us, His blessing. I used to struggle so badly with anxiety just getting up in the morning that I wanted specific signs to get through the day. Sometimes God would answer me, but sometimes He wouldn't the way I wanted or expected. I can look back now and see that I was really dependent on people to be used as the sign, and although God can and does use people, at that time in my life some of the people that I was depending on as a sign were really not great for me. I couldn't see that though. God wanted me to know that He was with me, and He would talk to me. Also, someone said, "Just the fact that you are breathing and here is the sign." She was right. I began to seek out the Bible and Christian books, and most of the time, God speaks to me when I listen to His word. There are just so many ways He speaks to us, that we just can't limit ourselves to one or two ways. In addition, although you were looking for a shooting star in the sky, what about the stars themselves? Who put those stars there? God put them there for you.
I want signs, I need signs, and I do get them, or I've gotten them after the fact, but when I don't get them exactly when I want, I have to remember that God says that He's with me, and He doesn't lie. I really think that God has given you signs, but that you perhaps didn't realize those "common" signs-life, your precious beautiful daughters, the stars in the sky-those were the signs.
Finally, I noticed that you wanted someone to represent God for you outside of yourself, through other people, etc. It could have been that God was showing you that He was inside of you in a still and small voice.
I hope this came across the right way because I'm in a hurry, and I may be being redundant, but I just know for a fact that God is with all of us, He does speak to us, and He does love us, and that most certainly includes you:). It took some hardships for me to see that clearly, and sometimes I still have my moments, but it's the truth:).
God bless you,
luvpiggy