Hi lael,
Naturally, only God knows for sure what's going on in your heart. In one of your recent posts you spoke of your biggest fear as being afraid to give something up. The subject of surrender comes to my mind and I thought that I would share a few excerpts from a book called "Truth or Propaganda"
There is an old story, somewhat lacking in authenticity, about a man chasing a rabbit through the woods. He was almost upon the rabbit, the story says, when suddenly they came to the edge of a cliff. The rabbit, of course, had the advantage. It was small and agile, able to make a quick turn and avoid going over the precipice. but the man couldn't make the turn and went over.
As he was falling, he sighted a limb on a bush and was able to grab it. Then he began to scream for help. He shouted, "Is anyone up there?" There was no answer. so he yelled again, this time still louder, "Is anyone up there?"
Finally he heard a stately voice from somewhere above, "To whom do you wish to speak?"
And the man, desparate as he hung onto the limb, managed to shout, "Anyone who will help me."
Then, according to the legend, the strange interchange continued. The voice from above asked, "Do you have faith?" And the man replied, "Yes." He hoped it was true.
"All right," said the voice, "if you have faith, let go of that limb."
The man hesitated. He looked down. It was a long way down. All that stood between him and certain death, it seemed, was that limb. Finally, after, a long silence, the desperate man shouted, "Is anyone else up there?"
Just a story. Just a legend. But how true to life. We think we have faith in God. We talk about it, and boast about it. And we get along fine--so long as our faith isn't challenged. But when it is--when we get into a tight spot where we have to throw our full weight on it, where we have to demonstrate it or deny it--that's another story.
It isn't easy to let go the limb we're holding onto--no matter how insecure it may be--and just trust God. And many a man, when God has asked of him a full surrender, has looked around for some other god to worship, for a faith that didn't require that kind of commitment. It isn't easy to let go!...Surrender is the most difficult thing in the Christian life. Yet surrender is the only key, the only entrance, to a saving relationship with our Lord. How can He save us until we stop trying to save ourselves? How can He save us until we are willing to let Him save us His way?
Surrender sounds like risk. That's why we fear it. We seem to think that God is just waiting to dump a whole assortment of unpleasant things on our heads the moment we surrender. Surely He will ask us to give up everything we don't want to do, and experience everything we don't want to experience.
What kind of God do we think He is? Would a God who loves us enough to give His only Son to die for us--would He go out of His way to make life as unpleasant as He could? The apostle Paul asks it this way: "He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?" Romans 8:32.
Listen. If you knew Him, if you really knew Him, you would be eager to let Him manage your life. You would know that it's perfectly safe. You would know that it involves no risk at all. Rather, the deeper your commitment, the more complete your surrender, the greater will be the sense of wonder at His love, His providence, His unfailng care. When you surrender to the Lord Jesus Christ, you are surrendering to One who loves you as if you were the only person in the world to love. Could there be any risk in that?...A man will never find personal victory until he throws aside his miserable crutches and says, "Lord, I am a sinner. I've made a mess out of my life. I can't manage it. I bring my defeated life to You just as a child brings a stubborn toy to his father. You make it work. I can't. But You can!"
That's how simple it is. It's difficult only because it isn't easy for a proud, hard heart to be broken. It isn't easy for a man to surrender, to admit that he is weak.
But surrender is the key. Without surrender there is no miracle, no victory, only continual defeat.
Surrender happens when we look at Calvary and see Jesus dying there in our place, on a cross that should have been ours. Surrender happens when that cross becomes more importrant than our pride, when we know that we don't want to wound the Saviour again--ever!
Then the miracle happens!
were is God?
Alone,
I know how you feel. I have been there. I am just now crawling out of my hole a little. I let a lot of things keep me from church and life. The program is helping me. If you read other posts in this spirituality topic, you will hear similar stories. I pray you will get back in the Word and back into prayer.
I know how you feel. I have been there. I am just now crawling out of my hole a little. I let a lot of things keep me from church and life. The program is helping me. If you read other posts in this spirituality topic, you will hear similar stories. I pray you will get back in the Word and back into prayer.
gil,
The thought and time you put into that post amazes me thank you. I so want to surrender and i ask God to let me surrender everyday. The problem is I want everything to return to normal i want it all to go back to just how it was i don't want to crawl out of this hole again i just want to not be in it. I laid awake last night and i had a moment were nothing mattred but that God loved me it was the closest i got to actually sleeping last night.
The thought and time you put into that post amazes me thank you. I so want to surrender and i ask God to let me surrender everyday. The problem is I want everything to return to normal i want it all to go back to just how it was i don't want to crawl out of this hole again i just want to not be in it. I laid awake last night and i had a moment were nothing mattred but that God loved me it was the closest i got to actually sleeping last night.
Hi. I personally believe now that the major root if not 'one' of the major ones of anxiety disorder is that it is an inablity to accept uncomfortable feelings. (I know so many really negative critical people - more negative than I've ever been, and they've never had a panic attack.) In this society we grow up being taught that we shouldn't feel angry, etc.. especially girls.. Perhaps as children we were rejected for having certain feelings or disciplined for our bad feelings & bad behaviour- the two were not separated. I recently bought an e-book on CBT and the author explains that instead of focusing on our feelings (ie. saying 'It's ok that I am experiencing nervousness for now. It cannot harm me')we should instead be focusing on what we can do. When we go ahead and do what we have to do we realize that the danger we thought was not way as much. We start to see it as bogus.
I am a Christian too. My faith has really been tested to the hilt the last 2 years.
It's true that we can joyfully talk about our faith, but it's not until you're in the FIRE that you see what you're made of !
People who have really helped me learn about the Grace and freedom of God are Charles Stanley, Joyce Meyer and Steve McVey.
Recently Charles Stanley had a 3 part video broadcast on Grace. It is really fabulous. He really explains who God is.. Many times we have this picture of God, that we need to continually perform to keep Him happy but that is further from the Truth. Even on our worst day he is rejoicing, clapping and singing and shouting over us. It just melts my heart.
Here is the link to the broadcasts if anyone is interested. <A HREF="http://www.intouch.org/site/c.dhKHIXPKI ... chives.htm" TARGET=_blank>http://www.intouch.org/site/c.dhKHIXPKI ... ves.htm</A>
Also JOyce Meyer had a broadcast just a few days ago on the Love of God with a guest panel.
I highly recommend this.
<A HREF="http://joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/Bro ... 080626.htm" TARGET=_blank>http://joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/Bro ... 626.htm</A>
Steve McVey has a great video series called the 'GraceWalk". You need to buy this. It is 6 CD's and it is by far the most treasured thing in my library. His website is Gracewalk.org
and also has a forum. You can also see him on youtube.com dispelling common teaching error.
I think this might be on his website too.
Recently I read this article
'Walking in the Spirit'
<A HREF="http://www.secretsofsuccess.com/resourc ... pirit.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.secretsofsuccess.com/resourc ... it.html</A>
It is really excellent because many times we have problems in life because we are walking in our flesh instead of depending/resting in the Holy Spirit. But that's OK, we are not perfect and we are on a journey. This 4 page article will tell you how and also encourages us to give thanks in our trials aka - 'Thank you God for my panic attacks'. Interestingly, this is a form of acceptance isn't it ? Here's a cut and paste from this particular topic of the article (page 4):
...........................................
In Romans 8:28 Paul writes, "We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Do you believe this promise of God's Word? If so, you logically acknowledge the reasonableness of the command of God in 1 Thessalonians 5:18: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
Have you learned to say, "Thank You, Lord," when your heart is broken because of the loss of a loved one? Do you thank God when tout body is wracked with pain? When you receive a letter terminating a love relationship? When you have financial reverses? When you fail an exam? When you are unemployed? Do you thank God when you are discriminated against personally, religiously, or racially?
You may say that only a fool would give thanks to God under such circumstances. Ho, not if you know "that in al things God works for the good of those who love him." If God has commanded you to give thanks, there is a reason for it. This is one of the most exciting lessons I have ever learned - the lesson of saying "Thank You" even when things go wrong.
Before I made this discovery I used to lose my patience when things went contrary to my wishes. Closed doors would often be forced open, if necessary. If they did not open before me, I tried to break them down, I was often tense inside an impatient with other. Then I discovered what a fool I was. Tragically we injure our brothers with our impatience, our criticism, out thoughtlessness. When Christians act this way, the entire Body of Christians suffers.
But God has given you a better plan.. You can relax. You can say "Thank You" when the whole world is crumbling around you because your God is sovereign and omnipotent. He holds the world in His hands, and you can trust Him, He loves you. And He promises to fight for you.
He has commanded you to cast all of your cares upon him because He cares for you. He personally visited this world and took your sins upon Himself, and He is waiting to bless and use you. But he will not bless and use you if you are worried and unbelieving. he will not bless and use you if you complain and criticize and find fault.
Some time ago, a young woman came to our headquarters for one of our training conferences. After one of my messages, she came for counsel. Through her tears she shared how her dearest friend had been killed in an accident. They were coming home from their engagement party, and an oncoming automobile crossed the center line, forcing her off the road into a telephone pole.
The tragedy was compounded by the guilt she felt because she had been driving the car. Her heart was broken.
"What shall I do?" she pleaded.
Months had passed and she had gone to psychiatrists, psychologists, ministers and many other seeking counsel. She said, "If you can't help me, I fear for my sanity."
I asked her if she were a Christian, and after some discussion she said, "Yes."
We read Romans 8:28 and I asked her, "So you believe that all things work for good?"
She said, "Yes, I believe that."
We turned to 1 Thessalonians 5:18. She read it aloud: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
I said to her, "Have you thanked God since the loss of your loved one?" She was shocked and could hardly believe she heard me correctly. Looking at me in disbelief, she said, "How can I thank God when I have experienced such a tragic loss?"
"You do not trust God, do you?" I asked.
"Yes, I trust God," she insisted.
"Then why not show Him that you do?" I asked, "I know it will be difficult and may seem ridiculous at first, but will you pray and tell God that you trust Him and give thanks in everything even though your heart is breaking?"
As we knelt together, she prayed through her tears, "God I don't understand why my dearest friend was killed, but I know I can trust You; and I do say , 'Thank You.'"
When she said, "Thank You," she was saying to God, "I will trust You." The Bible says that without faith you cannot please God, and the best way to demonstrate faith is to say, "Thank You." You may think that you hate God because you have lost a loved one, your inheritance, your money, your business or your health. You may ask, "Why did God do this to me?" But God says, :Give thanks in all circumstances."
That young lady came to my office early the next morning literally bubbling with joy. She said, "Last might I slept without medication for the first time since the accident. And this morning when I awakened, my heart was filled with praise and thanksgiving to God. I just cannot understand it, but I know that it has something to do with what you taught me about saying 'Thank You' to God."
I could share hundreds of similar stories about Christians whose lives have been transformed by learning the simple lesson of saying "Thank You" in all things.
......................
Anyways, just sharing what helped me..
Regards, Peace one
I am a Christian too. My faith has really been tested to the hilt the last 2 years.
It's true that we can joyfully talk about our faith, but it's not until you're in the FIRE that you see what you're made of !
People who have really helped me learn about the Grace and freedom of God are Charles Stanley, Joyce Meyer and Steve McVey.
Recently Charles Stanley had a 3 part video broadcast on Grace. It is really fabulous. He really explains who God is.. Many times we have this picture of God, that we need to continually perform to keep Him happy but that is further from the Truth. Even on our worst day he is rejoicing, clapping and singing and shouting over us. It just melts my heart.
Here is the link to the broadcasts if anyone is interested. <A HREF="http://www.intouch.org/site/c.dhKHIXPKI ... chives.htm" TARGET=_blank>http://www.intouch.org/site/c.dhKHIXPKI ... ves.htm</A>
Also JOyce Meyer had a broadcast just a few days ago on the Love of God with a guest panel.
I highly recommend this.
<A HREF="http://joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/Bro ... 080626.htm" TARGET=_blank>http://joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/Bro ... 626.htm</A>
Steve McVey has a great video series called the 'GraceWalk". You need to buy this. It is 6 CD's and it is by far the most treasured thing in my library. His website is Gracewalk.org
and also has a forum. You can also see him on youtube.com dispelling common teaching error.
I think this might be on his website too.
Recently I read this article
'Walking in the Spirit'
<A HREF="http://www.secretsofsuccess.com/resourc ... pirit.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.secretsofsuccess.com/resourc ... it.html</A>
It is really excellent because many times we have problems in life because we are walking in our flesh instead of depending/resting in the Holy Spirit. But that's OK, we are not perfect and we are on a journey. This 4 page article will tell you how and also encourages us to give thanks in our trials aka - 'Thank you God for my panic attacks'. Interestingly, this is a form of acceptance isn't it ? Here's a cut and paste from this particular topic of the article (page 4):
...........................................
In Romans 8:28 Paul writes, "We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Do you believe this promise of God's Word? If so, you logically acknowledge the reasonableness of the command of God in 1 Thessalonians 5:18: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
Have you learned to say, "Thank You, Lord," when your heart is broken because of the loss of a loved one? Do you thank God when tout body is wracked with pain? When you receive a letter terminating a love relationship? When you have financial reverses? When you fail an exam? When you are unemployed? Do you thank God when you are discriminated against personally, religiously, or racially?
You may say that only a fool would give thanks to God under such circumstances. Ho, not if you know "that in al things God works for the good of those who love him." If God has commanded you to give thanks, there is a reason for it. This is one of the most exciting lessons I have ever learned - the lesson of saying "Thank You" even when things go wrong.
Before I made this discovery I used to lose my patience when things went contrary to my wishes. Closed doors would often be forced open, if necessary. If they did not open before me, I tried to break them down, I was often tense inside an impatient with other. Then I discovered what a fool I was. Tragically we injure our brothers with our impatience, our criticism, out thoughtlessness. When Christians act this way, the entire Body of Christians suffers.
But God has given you a better plan.. You can relax. You can say "Thank You" when the whole world is crumbling around you because your God is sovereign and omnipotent. He holds the world in His hands, and you can trust Him, He loves you. And He promises to fight for you.
He has commanded you to cast all of your cares upon him because He cares for you. He personally visited this world and took your sins upon Himself, and He is waiting to bless and use you. But he will not bless and use you if you are worried and unbelieving. he will not bless and use you if you complain and criticize and find fault.
Some time ago, a young woman came to our headquarters for one of our training conferences. After one of my messages, she came for counsel. Through her tears she shared how her dearest friend had been killed in an accident. They were coming home from their engagement party, and an oncoming automobile crossed the center line, forcing her off the road into a telephone pole.
The tragedy was compounded by the guilt she felt because she had been driving the car. Her heart was broken.
"What shall I do?" she pleaded.
Months had passed and she had gone to psychiatrists, psychologists, ministers and many other seeking counsel. She said, "If you can't help me, I fear for my sanity."
I asked her if she were a Christian, and after some discussion she said, "Yes."
We read Romans 8:28 and I asked her, "So you believe that all things work for good?"
She said, "Yes, I believe that."
We turned to 1 Thessalonians 5:18. She read it aloud: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
I said to her, "Have you thanked God since the loss of your loved one?" She was shocked and could hardly believe she heard me correctly. Looking at me in disbelief, she said, "How can I thank God when I have experienced such a tragic loss?"
"You do not trust God, do you?" I asked.
"Yes, I trust God," she insisted.
"Then why not show Him that you do?" I asked, "I know it will be difficult and may seem ridiculous at first, but will you pray and tell God that you trust Him and give thanks in everything even though your heart is breaking?"
As we knelt together, she prayed through her tears, "God I don't understand why my dearest friend was killed, but I know I can trust You; and I do say , 'Thank You.'"
When she said, "Thank You," she was saying to God, "I will trust You." The Bible says that without faith you cannot please God, and the best way to demonstrate faith is to say, "Thank You." You may think that you hate God because you have lost a loved one, your inheritance, your money, your business or your health. You may ask, "Why did God do this to me?" But God says, :Give thanks in all circumstances."
That young lady came to my office early the next morning literally bubbling with joy. She said, "Last might I slept without medication for the first time since the accident. And this morning when I awakened, my heart was filled with praise and thanksgiving to God. I just cannot understand it, but I know that it has something to do with what you taught me about saying 'Thank You' to God."
I could share hundreds of similar stories about Christians whose lives have been transformed by learning the simple lesson of saying "Thank You" in all things.
......................
Anyways, just sharing what helped me..
Regards, Peace one
lael,
i am sorry that you have been suffering so much. as you guessed, yes--i think i have been in a similar place.
i must say that it is wonderful that you had the time that you described as peaceful--when things seemed to be going smoothly. those times are nice.
however we all have growing pains--and in a strange way they are a privilege. God can help us above and beyond what we can imagine--so i pray that you will have courage and strength to make good choices and walk toward your calling.
God bless!
i am sorry that you have been suffering so much. as you guessed, yes--i think i have been in a similar place.
i must say that it is wonderful that you had the time that you described as peaceful--when things seemed to be going smoothly. those times are nice.
however we all have growing pains--and in a strange way they are a privilege. God can help us above and beyond what we can imagine--so i pray that you will have courage and strength to make good choices and walk toward your calling.
God bless!
I will sing unto the LORD, because he hath dealt bountifully with me.
Psalm 13:6
Psalm 13:6
My husband and I will pray for you. All you have to do to serve God is live right, be happy and be kind and loving towards others, be yourself. Sometimes what seems to be devestating can turn out to be an answer to a prayer. I went to prison at one point in my life and while there I was required to have a mammogram becasuse of my age. Well, guess what, they found out that I had cancer. I had been praying for years for God to help me get away from the lifesyle I was leading but thought he wasn't listening. If I had not gone to prison I would be dead now. My point is, I too, thought that Satan had a hold on me that I could not break. I was living a horrilbe life, in constant danger and doing drugs (with my mental health conditions) I guess I was trying to self medicate. During my cancer treatment I came to REALLY know God and I now have faith and hope like I've never known. That was 5 years ago. Now with alot of praying, hope and faith my life is in a place I never even dreamed it would be. I am married, as far as I know free from cancer, living in a nice home, completely clean, and thanking God even for the bad times. When times are bad or we have doubts we must remember to have hope and faith. You may think that God is not hearing your prayers becasue things have not changed for you yet but Believe me when I tell you He is there, you must, above all else have hope and faith. He will show you the way in time. Trust in Him with all your heart and don't be so quick to forget about all the great times and happiness He has given you. God Bless you and I pray that God gives you strength, understanding, and peace of mind.
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barbhoward
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Mon Jun 30, 2008 1:28 pm
THank you to all, I am almost afraid to say that despite not sleeping last night today was a good day. I am learning the God loves me even though i am not perfect and even though i cannot be perfect i am learning to understand him as a God of love not a God who is always telling me i should be doing better and until i do i will suffer. This time would be easier for me to bare if i honestly believed all i had to do was wait on the Lord instead i keep thinking there MUST be something i need to do some formula i need to figure out. I am scared tho mostly becasue of the not sleeping i don't have insurance so i can't go to a doctor so pray for me about sleeping please
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dreamwalking123
- Posts: 4
- Joined: Sat Jan 10, 2004 2:00 am
lael,
You hit the nail right on the head! You think that there is something that you have to do in order to "fix" this. This is the same problem I had for so long. I still struggle with it from time to time but I must say it does get easier and the fog does begin to clear when you stand your ground. Giving up control in anything in our lives is scary. I always feel that there is something that I have to do in order to fix anything that is wrong. Really there is only one thing that we as christians need to do..."Be still and know that He is God".
I used to think - yeah right..how can I be still when my thoughts in my mind are going at warp speed? But it is so true. Stop trying to fix it- just relax and know that He wants so much more for us than this.
A few years ago- I went through a very rough time. I had a miscarriage and it really threw me and my anxiety into a tailspin. Then one Sunday at church an aquantance came up to me and said " I have wanted to tell you how much my heart aches for you. I went through the same thing not too long ago and I know what you are going through." She then went on to tell me that when she miscarried her doctor said to her..."Perhaps you are going through this experience to help someone else go through it too." She then told me he must be right because she felt as if she needed to extend that hand out to me in my time of need. SHe was a huge help to me and I still think of her often. What I learned from that was that I became a stronger person in the long run. I didn't see it as it was happening but I see it now. I went through this program about 5 years ago and I must say it made a huge difference to me. It helped me open up to thers who are or were going through the same exact thing. I still come back occasionally to give myself a check-up when I may be feeling vulnerable but trust me when I say that you can overcome this.
Stay the course, lean on God and be excited about what he is gleaming you for. I just ran across this verses this morning and it really struck a cord.... 1 Corinthians 1:3-11
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our[a] behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
God Bless and keep us posted!
You hit the nail right on the head! You think that there is something that you have to do in order to "fix" this. This is the same problem I had for so long. I still struggle with it from time to time but I must say it does get easier and the fog does begin to clear when you stand your ground. Giving up control in anything in our lives is scary. I always feel that there is something that I have to do in order to fix anything that is wrong. Really there is only one thing that we as christians need to do..."Be still and know that He is God".
I used to think - yeah right..how can I be still when my thoughts in my mind are going at warp speed? But it is so true. Stop trying to fix it- just relax and know that He wants so much more for us than this.
A few years ago- I went through a very rough time. I had a miscarriage and it really threw me and my anxiety into a tailspin. Then one Sunday at church an aquantance came up to me and said " I have wanted to tell you how much my heart aches for you. I went through the same thing not too long ago and I know what you are going through." She then went on to tell me that when she miscarried her doctor said to her..."Perhaps you are going through this experience to help someone else go through it too." She then told me he must be right because she felt as if she needed to extend that hand out to me in my time of need. SHe was a huge help to me and I still think of her often. What I learned from that was that I became a stronger person in the long run. I didn't see it as it was happening but I see it now. I went through this program about 5 years ago and I must say it made a huge difference to me. It helped me open up to thers who are or were going through the same exact thing. I still come back occasionally to give myself a check-up when I may be feeling vulnerable but trust me when I say that you can overcome this.
Stay the course, lean on God and be excited about what he is gleaming you for. I just ran across this verses this morning and it really struck a cord.... 1 Corinthians 1:3-11
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our[a] behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
God Bless and keep us posted!
" For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of peace, love and a sound mind!" 2 Timothy 1:7
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shootingstarz
- Posts: 4
- Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2008 9:46 pm