obsessing about unwanted thoughts

kriskam01 · Post by **kriskam01** » Sat Nov 15, 2008 5:25 am

hello
i had a bad experiance with a surgery about 10months ago and this is when all my unwanted thoughts and anxiety started. i have been to 2 diff docs and a counselor and was diagnosed by all of them with severs anxiety caused by a trauma. i just can't convince myself that it is only that and nothing else. i was having unwanted thoughts about hurting someone in my family or myself and i would never ever do that. i then started medication and then obsessed it would make me kill myself so i slowly got off the meds and have felt better but somedays i wake up with those scary thoughts still there. it is way better then it was and i can say it is only that but i feel like i am going crazy having to tell myself to think positive when i have never had anything like this happen to me before. i hate it and want it gone. i want the old me back and i know it will come just takes time. if anyone out there can relate please help. give me some tips.

caro_tafur · Post by **caro_tafur** » Sat Nov 15, 2008 5:59 am

hey kriskam , when i read your post i almost started crying from joy because i didnt feel like the only one anymore , i had read many post here but none that could relate to me until i came across yours , i also have thoughts of hurting someone that i love or hurting myself and it kills me because i know i will never do that it , it makes me feel helpless and it makes me feel like i am going crazy . I know what you are going through and maybe we could help each other out since we both have the same obsessive thoughts . maybe we could exchange info .. w.b

kriskam01 · Post by **kriskam01** » Sat Nov 15, 2008 7:16 am

hey caro
i would be glad to help with anything you need. just ask away and i will answer and same for you.

Irish222 · Post by **Irish222** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 4:36 am

Hey Guys. I'm new here, but I wanted to speak on the topic too. I also have obsessive, unwanted thoughts. They are so intrusive, and constant. It seems to take over my life. Have you found anything that helps?

LisaLisa · Post by **LisaLisa** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 4:48 am

Hi Guys,

I had these scary thoughts, too. When they happen, picture a stop sign going up in your mind to force you to stop, and try to turn your thoughts to something positive, or find another task to occupy your thoughts.

I was worried I would hurt someone in my family or myself, too. This is just anxiety. If you are worried about your thoughts, then you know that you will not act on those thoughts. They are trying to distract you from what is really bothering you, which in my case, was a panic attack and the feelings that come with them.

I hope this helps to know you are not alone. I have gone through the program and continue to work throught my issues, but I can tell you I am much more comfortable and have not had any anxiety issues since July, so hang in there, it will get better

LisaLisa

kriskam01 · Post by **kriskam01** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 6:24 am

hey lisalisa

thanks so much for your input. i do try the stop sign are something diff but i just still feel this scaredness inside like i am about to start crying and i know that is the panic. i just get sooo freaked out over this and know that it is only anxiety but i can't seem to let the stupid habit go. i get up every morning telling myself am i going to feel that way today and then it brings it on. i hate it and want to get mad and fight it and i have come along way i promise. there were days in the past i just sat and cried and didn't know what was wrong with me. then my doc wanted me test for bi polar which didn't help me it just scared me more and i have never in my life had anything like this before. i went to my couslor and she said that she diagnoses and treats people with bi polar and other disorders and i was no where close to that but what bothers me is i just can't let it go. i worry myself to were i can't think straight sometimes telling myself oh that stuff is in the past let it go. then 5 min later here goes a thought from the past when i see something that reminds me of it. i jsut hate it and want to get mad and get it out of my head. i know i am fine because i can still function and go on and can see the future and i see it with excitment and no anxiety but then i just snap back to the scared panic me and tell myself i have soemthing wrong with me and i just feel myself go from happy to sad like that. i need my self confidence back

LisaLisa · Post by **LisaLisa** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:20 am

kriskam0,

I was in the exact spot you are in right now. My thoughts scared me so much that I ended up spending a lot of time crying over them. I ended up going to a counselor that specializes in anxiety disorders. She got me into the habit of journaling every time I had panic thoughts, racing thoughts, angry thoughts, etc. I just free wrote, whatever was racing through my head was put down on paper. I have to tell you, it worked wonders. I still journal every single day. I also learned through counseling that the scary thoughts are just another layer of anxiety. This means your self-talk is working. You are constructively addressing your anxiety. I got this Program on the advice of my anxiety counselor, she said this program would enhance the skills I learned from her. I went through the same feelings you described in your post. I never thought I would see the light at the end of the tunnel, but I did. Keep talking to yourself with positive reinforcements like you are doing. If I can help in anyway, just drop me a line.

LisaLisa

Irish222 · Post by **Irish222** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 12:50 pm

LisaLisa, Thanks for your positive advice. I feel as though I am having a "growth spurt" as Lucinda Bassett says. I know it is going to pass, but your positivity and encouragment really help.

finding happiness · Post by **finding happiness** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 1:24 pm

hi everyone: I just wanted to tell you all that knowledge truly is power. Now that I know scary thoughts happen to all of us at times, it hasn't been as bad to deal with. I did get myself to a point where I couldn't touch anyone though and that really hurt me. I am learning to relax and feel free but I wanted to share that in case others felt that fear to. That definately gets better to. I am learning to trust that this was caused by anxiety and depression and I feel much more free. I am a good person with a fun attitude. It was hard to see myself get to this point but now I am getting better and it feels great. Hang in there. Stay positive. Don't let unreasonable expectations about yourself get in your way. Take care and believe in yourself.

Lynnier · Post by **Lynnier** » Sun Nov 16, 2008 1:38 pm

Hi Guys: Thanks so much for sharing on how to stop the obsessive, unwanted thoughts. I'm new to the program and have been "walking" through a cloud the first few days. Tonight was the first time the unwanted thoughts intruded into my mind. I kept trying to find ways to defeat them, but they kept coming and coming, making me want to scream and over-react to a situation in my life. Then, I started with the "what-if" thinking and I felt myself moving into a full fledged panic/anxiety attack. I came in to read what you had written and it really helped. Thanks! The stop sign idea is perfect!