Hello, guys!
I feel very low lately. I have constant mind chatter with extremely threatening and crazy thoughts. My internal voice insult me and people who are very close to me. And I feel extreme fear and guilt about that. I have many independent and rambling thoughts.
Can any of you relate ?
Harm OCD & S-OCD. Please reply....
Megan - There are many ways to deal with obsessive thinking and one of the ways is to tell "it" to "shut the devil up". It's just your voice. You've heard it repetitiously for a very long time and now it has become a habit. You must not resist anymore. After you tell the thoughts to shut up then get busy in the present moment and keep your attention on what you are doing, not what your chatterbox is saying. Always bring yourself back to the present moment.
Another way is to realize that it doesn't matter if you have these thoughts. So what! They aren't true so just allow them to come and go without you attaching to any of them. When you stop resisting them they will subside. They get weaker and quieter and you are able to dismiss them easily. It takes practice but persevere because you can heal from this.
Another way is to realize that it doesn't matter if you have these thoughts. So what! They aren't true so just allow them to come and go without you attaching to any of them. When you stop resisting them they will subside. They get weaker and quieter and you are able to dismiss them easily. It takes practice but persevere because you can heal from this.
"Life is not about comfort. It is about living." Dr. Howard Liebgold
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clearsky27
- Posts: 38
- Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 8:11 am
Many thanks for your replies clearsky27 and Boon!
clearsky27, S-OCD is fear of shizophrenia. Few months ago I've made a mistake to research shizophrenia's symptoms and then I start apply them to me. I think till them my OCD was much bearable. Now I wonder if I have OCD anymore.
If you asked me if I hear voices, the answer is definitely not! But I make a dialogue with my internal voice and very often I argue with myself. I don't know if that is typical OCD symptom, but it's very scary. It's exactly like when you read a book, but voiceless. If you understand what I mean. I also repeat mentally some sentences and words which are nonsences.
I often had a feeling that I going crazy. Last night was terrible, I actualy felt like I went crazy!
I think that my imagination makes me believe that I actually suffer from a psychosis.
P.S.Sorry for my poor english!
clearsky27, S-OCD is fear of shizophrenia. Few months ago I've made a mistake to research shizophrenia's symptoms and then I start apply them to me. I think till them my OCD was much bearable. Now I wonder if I have OCD anymore.
If you asked me if I hear voices, the answer is definitely not! But I make a dialogue with my internal voice and very often I argue with myself. I don't know if that is typical OCD symptom, but it's very scary. It's exactly like when you read a book, but voiceless. If you understand what I mean. I also repeat mentally some sentences and words which are nonsences.
I often had a feeling that I going crazy. Last night was terrible, I actualy felt like I went crazy!
I think that my imagination makes me believe that I actually suffer from a psychosis.
P.S.Sorry for my poor english!
Don't run away, dive in your life!
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clearsky27
- Posts: 38
- Joined: Thu May 28, 2009 8:11 am
Megun,
I used to do the same thing. The internet can be dangerous for me becuase I look up things and then try and apply them to me and almost can convince myself I have something. I too used to look up schizophrenia and was convinced I had it or was developing it. IT passed for me and it will for you too. You talking to yourslef in your head is fine and this is where the program would come in handy. Talk to yourself with repsect and be POSITIVE. Even if at first you feel like your faking it or it seems strange just do it. When your nasty ocd dialouge starts saying "what if I am crazy" say calmly "I am not crazy , this is just my ridiculous ocd at it again, Im not even going to humor that thought, I am a great person" then change gears DO Something, anything. This has worked for me lately. I took Boons advice and if I didnt have something to do, I whisteled , I hummed, I did whatever and it passed. Try it. Also take comfort in knowng that you are not alone on this fear. One of the most common fears with OCD is fear of going crazy and guess what none of us did, you wont either. Now I know you may be sitting there and thinking well maybe Im different or what if mines not ocd, what if Im that one case. YOUR NOT. I along with many others have followed up our ocd thought of going crazy with those very same questions. That is just your ocd tryin to get you since it sees that you are not standing for it! Hold your ground. You are not nor will you ever go crazy!
I used to do the same thing. The internet can be dangerous for me becuase I look up things and then try and apply them to me and almost can convince myself I have something. I too used to look up schizophrenia and was convinced I had it or was developing it. IT passed for me and it will for you too. You talking to yourslef in your head is fine and this is where the program would come in handy. Talk to yourself with repsect and be POSITIVE. Even if at first you feel like your faking it or it seems strange just do it. When your nasty ocd dialouge starts saying "what if I am crazy" say calmly "I am not crazy , this is just my ridiculous ocd at it again, Im not even going to humor that thought, I am a great person" then change gears DO Something, anything. This has worked for me lately. I took Boons advice and if I didnt have something to do, I whisteled , I hummed, I did whatever and it passed. Try it. Also take comfort in knowng that you are not alone on this fear. One of the most common fears with OCD is fear of going crazy and guess what none of us did, you wont either. Now I know you may be sitting there and thinking well maybe Im different or what if mines not ocd, what if Im that one case. YOUR NOT. I along with many others have followed up our ocd thought of going crazy with those very same questions. That is just your ocd tryin to get you since it sees that you are not standing for it! Hold your ground. You are not nor will you ever go crazy!
clearsky27, thank you so much for you quick reply!
I try to distract myself, but sometimes I'm so afraid and I can't think and do nothing else.
I've severe panic attacks and feel so paralysed.
I'm so convinced that I have some awful mental illness and can't chase away this fear.
I think I'll never be myself again...and I'm lost forever.
I try to distract myself, but sometimes I'm so afraid and I can't think and do nothing else.
I've severe panic attacks and feel so paralysed.
I'm so convinced that I have some awful mental illness and can't chase away this fear.
I think I'll never be myself again...and I'm lost forever.
Don't run away, dive in your life!
Well, Megan, I'm going to suggest something here and you do this when you can. It doesn't have to be today or tomorrow but only when you feel comfortable doing it.
Make it OK to go crazy.
It's ok to tell yourself that it's ok to go crazy. Breathe into this and feel those scary feelings that come up for you when you say this. Our thoughts are not a call to action. They are just thoughts. They are a bad habit.
When you can relax with "It's ok to go crazy." you will no longer have this fear and you will feel the peace you are looking for.
Have a support person you can turn to for comfort while you are doing this. A therapist in your area - perhaps you can see her or she once a week for awhile.
Nothing bad will happen to you altho your scarevoice will tell you something bad will happen. It's lying, tho, just like it always does.
Just say OK and move on with your day.
Make it OK to go crazy.
It's ok to tell yourself that it's ok to go crazy. Breathe into this and feel those scary feelings that come up for you when you say this. Our thoughts are not a call to action. They are just thoughts. They are a bad habit.
When you can relax with "It's ok to go crazy." you will no longer have this fear and you will feel the peace you are looking for.
Have a support person you can turn to for comfort while you are doing this. A therapist in your area - perhaps you can see her or she once a week for awhile.
Nothing bad will happen to you altho your scarevoice will tell you something bad will happen. It's lying, tho, just like it always does.
Just say OK and move on with your day.
"Life is not about comfort. It is about living." Dr. Howard Liebgold
Boon- I've read a lot of your comments and you shoudl go be a therapist. you sound just like mine sometimes. Mindful acceptance just letting the thoughts be. its soooo darn hard in moments of distress though. I am freaking out that I am depressed right now. diagnosed anxiety with some ocd. my therpaist just told me yesterday I am not depressed and doesnt need to see me for 4 weeks. I know in my heart I am not a depressed person- but have looked and checked the internet and completly freaked my self. some people do it with schizo, bi-polar, being gay. whatever. I just feel so scared of the depression thing because it is soo not me. I am a very social, outgoing, funloving person. looove to be out and about enjoying life. but depression is so linked to anxiety I just feel as if I kind of MUST have it. like everyone with anxiety does- least what the internet says. thanks for your positive attitude. I hope you doing well.
Your therapist would be the best judge of whether or not you are depressed and it sounds like she has confirmed that you are not. YOU CAN BELIEVE HER. That scarevoice is wreaking havoc on your mind and you can tell it to "knock it off". Sometimes we just need a break from that "bugger".
Throughout the day practice just allowing the fearful thoughts to be there - without you attaching to them. Just let the thoughts come and go. Don't have any opinion about your fearful thoughts one way or the other. Thoughts are not a call to action so let them be there. With this practice you will find that the thoughts lose their power when you no longer resist them.
Your attitude needs to be: So what if I have these thoughts?
Another approach is to make depression ok to experience. Sometimes having anxiety can be a depressing experience. This is called situational depression and it won't hurt you. Let it be there. It comes and goes with our thoughts.
Practice allowing. You will stop freaking out with continued practice.
And, stay off the internet! Outlaw it for yourself. If you must research then research the history of our nation.
Keep working on yourself and start a list of positive sayings. Lucinda has a great list started on tape 10. Add one new thing everyday and read it twice a day. Once upon awakening and once at bedtime.
Be patient with your healing. It will come.
Throughout the day practice just allowing the fearful thoughts to be there - without you attaching to them. Just let the thoughts come and go. Don't have any opinion about your fearful thoughts one way or the other. Thoughts are not a call to action so let them be there. With this practice you will find that the thoughts lose their power when you no longer resist them.
Your attitude needs to be: So what if I have these thoughts?
Another approach is to make depression ok to experience. Sometimes having anxiety can be a depressing experience. This is called situational depression and it won't hurt you. Let it be there. It comes and goes with our thoughts.
Practice allowing. You will stop freaking out with continued practice.
And, stay off the internet! Outlaw it for yourself. If you must research then research the history of our nation.
Keep working on yourself and start a list of positive sayings. Lucinda has a great list started on tape 10. Add one new thing everyday and read it twice a day. Once upon awakening and once at bedtime.
Be patient with your healing. It will come.
"Life is not about comfort. It is about living." Dr. Howard Liebgold