Scary thoughts
So, how do you distinguish between a scary thought & true feelings? I'm trying to change my thinking, as CBT teaches that thoughts control feelings. I've just been dealing with these thoughts for so long & am on Zoloft that at times I feel emotionally numb. I don't know if it is because I just don't care or my medication, or my mind is in protective mode. Need clarity. Hoping to gain it clarity with this program.
Sometimes if I'm having an obsessive episode I have to get myself back into the frame of mind that the thoughts don't bother me. You just have to kind of let them be there without trying to force them out of you're mind. But you get this feeling that because the thought isn't bothering you so much anymore that there is something wrong with you and that thought can be a scary one in itself. It's tough but with practice it isn't so bad in time. Once you can get to the point that you are desensitized and the thought doesn't bother you so much and they become less frequent. I hope this helps a little (if you can relate to what I'm talking about).
Flower - Whatever you hear from the scare voice is always a lie or extremely exaggerated. It has no truth and if you look at your history you will see this for yourself. You have not done any of the things that this scare voice talks to you about. The feelings come from the scare thoughts. Those feelings just tell you that you have scared yourself - those feelings are not telling you that your thoughts are true.
Inside of you, you really know what the truth is. If you see a sad thing, you will feel sadness. That's a real feeling. If you grieve this is a real feeling. If you see something tender this is a real feeling. If there is an earthquake and you are in that earthquake, those fears are real. You can use tornadoes, hurricane, volcanic eruption (if you are in that area). Altho, there are people who are not afraid of these things. Nevertheless, if you are really experiencing them in real time then you are probably experiencing the real feelings of fear. But when our minds conjur up wild tales of killing others, etc., etc., and worry about the above examples, you can be sure that those feelings are coming from us scaring ourselves and that type of fear is not real.
And, addressing the concern that Tom mentioned in regard to when you begin to feel better and that fear no longer bothers you - you remind yourself that "you have moved through that fear and can see the ridiculousness of it." It is OK to relax. That's one fear behind you. Move forward and address the other fears now so that they can be behind you as well. Recall Jackie on one of the tapes where she was bathing her child and began to chuckle when she realized she no longer feared what she used to fear. She felt so much lighter with that awareness of letting go. Don't let the scare voice run your life. Dismiss it, and move on.
Inside of you, you really know what the truth is. If you see a sad thing, you will feel sadness. That's a real feeling. If you grieve this is a real feeling. If you see something tender this is a real feeling. If there is an earthquake and you are in that earthquake, those fears are real. You can use tornadoes, hurricane, volcanic eruption (if you are in that area). Altho, there are people who are not afraid of these things. Nevertheless, if you are really experiencing them in real time then you are probably experiencing the real feelings of fear. But when our minds conjur up wild tales of killing others, etc., etc., and worry about the above examples, you can be sure that those feelings are coming from us scaring ourselves and that type of fear is not real.
And, addressing the concern that Tom mentioned in regard to when you begin to feel better and that fear no longer bothers you - you remind yourself that "you have moved through that fear and can see the ridiculousness of it." It is OK to relax. That's one fear behind you. Move forward and address the other fears now so that they can be behind you as well. Recall Jackie on one of the tapes where she was bathing her child and began to chuckle when she realized she no longer feared what she used to fear. She felt so much lighter with that awareness of letting go. Don't let the scare voice run your life. Dismiss it, and move on.
"Life is not about comfort. It is about living." Dr. Howard Liebgold