upset with - well I"m not sure- with her some, and with life in general. I'm just very angry and I can't seem to get out of this "place" I'm in. I don't know how to get out. I'm just so mad. I keep
treating my partner very mean and terrible- so
much that I told her not to come near me to protect her feelings. I don't know what to do. I'm not upset or being mean to anybody else. Just her. What can I do? How can I get over this and move on? She's apologized and I've excepted her apology so it's really not her anymore- I'm just so angry and can't talk to her, I just get so mad. Help!
I got angry 2 days ago with my partner- I'm no longer mad at her, but I'm still very
Your post reminded me of myself. I've got anger issues and tend to take it out on those who dare to love me. I think the anger is a bad habit like Lucinda says and a mechanism to not face things. I also think that poor self esteem on my part makes me belittle those who like me, because after all, why would someone like me when I don't? I've finished the program recently and am learning to control the anger better and see it for what it is, just a bad habit. It's not easy by any stretch, and I'm in a pissy mood this morning which I'm desperately trying to control. I like to remind myself that when someone points fingers at others, they're pointing 3 at themself. Try it. When you blow up at someone, instead of focusing on them, figure out your agenda. Change the things you can, accept the things you can't. Lastly, forgiveness is the best thing you can do for yourself. Forgive your partner and most important, forgive yourself for not handling it perfectly. In the paper this morning, there was an article about the benefits of forgiveness and it suggests a 3 step process: 1. Admit you are holding a grudge. 2. Put yourself in the other persons shoes. 3. Ritualize the act of forgiveness itself. The psychiatrist that wrote it said he writes down his angry feelings; meditates on his intention to forgive; visualizes the person he's forgiving; and lastly, burns the paper and then scatters the ashes to the wind. I never tried it but I'm contemplating it. The person I need to forgive most is me, and then maybe I won't have to punish those around me for daring to see the good in me. Good luck.