Hi, I have been with the program a while. I should be done but I got stuck in the beginning trying to be perfect and answering everything perfectly. I lost my parents years ago. I lost me father-in-law, mother-in-law, and husband all with in a two year period from 2005 to 2007. I have two boys, and a step daughter and step son. All grown and have children of there own. I have 7 grand kids all together.
Anyway, I have suffered with sever depression since I was out on my own in my late teens. I am very very lucky to have a home that hasn't been taken away from me. My son, his wife and grandson moved in with me after my husbands death. I have more than enough clothes, food, even more than I need.
I was very fortunate to have been able to travel a lot with my husband for a few years after we sold our business. I also have a great boss who is very understanding of my situation.
But every day I get so depressed I can hardly make it through day with out wanting to kill myself. I have tried counselors, this program, sensory learning program, I was saved 3 years before my husband passed away. I read the bible, I listen to the bible on tape in the car, I listen to in the car. But one minute I am ok, the next on a 360 ride to hell.
I don't have a lot of friend, none. Most of our friends were my husbands and since he passed away, I haven't heard from them, most of them are married. I don't know if that has anything to do with it.
I have always been a follower, now there is no one to follow. I can't have my son's family live with me forever so I don't flip out.
I just feel so lost and alone. I have gone to church but feel lost there too. Help please, any ideas are helpful. the only thing that has kept me a live is my one son said that if I killed myself that he would tell my grand kids that I couldn't make it in the real world. Also what I understand in the bible is that it would be a sin to kill yourself. Third I haven't figured out how to do it with out voiding my life insurance policy. Then my kids wouldn't get anything to help themselves.
Lost in Grand Rapids
P.S. I am on week 9 now, haven't done the best with the work book, but listen to the tapes daily and the note cards. Also I have no idea how to find woman's groups that don't want to drink, get drunk, or have sex with everyone. I have to many issues to worry about another man in my life.
lost and lonely
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Guest
Hello,
I was really moved by your post. I will be lifting you up in prayer. As I was listening to my first video, the author mentioned how we have so much to offer others. You may want to consider joining your Church's women department or begin working with some type ministry in your church. This has helped me some. I work with the outreach ministry, joining them when they go to the nursing home or to visit the sick and shut in, etc. I found this helps me through my tough time, when I am serving others. I hope this help a little.
I was really moved by your post. I will be lifting you up in prayer. As I was listening to my first video, the author mentioned how we have so much to offer others. You may want to consider joining your Church's women department or begin working with some type ministry in your church. This has helped me some. I work with the outreach ministry, joining them when they go to the nursing home or to visit the sick and shut in, etc. I found this helps me through my tough time, when I am serving others. I hope this help a little.
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Guest
Hi Thank you for the good idea Brenda, I just don't know that much about the bible yet, and guess I feel I have nothing to offer them. It is hard for me to understand the bible let alone share it with others. I just always feel stupid and alone. But I will check into it. Thanks again for the helpful ideaBrenda Outlaw
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Guest
Look at www.meetup.com and see if there is something going on in your area. Not a singles things, but a hobby group or language group - something you can identify with.
Also if you want to learn more about the Bible, look into some small groups through a local church, many of them meet once a week for Bible study and fellowship.
I have to say it's not my thing, and I'm not a social person either, but if my family was gone, I would probably do that.
Also if you want to learn more about the Bible, look into some small groups through a local church, many of them meet once a week for Bible study and fellowship.
I have to say it's not my thing, and I'm not a social person either, but if my family was gone, I would probably do that.
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Guest
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Guest
Lost One,
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your parents and husband.
I have also faced depression. It is a very hard thing to face. It can bring you down to the bottom and make you feel like there is never anything more. I am not convinced that I am done with depression, but I am starting to feel better. I am in week three. Practicing the self talk is definatly helping me. I have to remember that the bad things I say to myself do not help me. When I start getting stuck on something that is upsetting, I have two responses, one I journal about it. IF I don't have time I just tell my self it is only thoughts and push it out for a while. You can repeat anything else you want.
I just read your story and I understand about being alone. I lost my job. I am an online college student. Along with my job I lost alot of friends. I talk to my mom a couple times a day on the phone other than that it is just me and my cats. I just wanted to let you know that I understand how bad it can get. I have been there, crying and crying because I couldn't leave this world now. I am like you I wouldn't take my life, but I wouldn't be sad if I just magically vanished. But hopefully we can work on turning things around.
Here are some ideas.
Basic depression survival when I am at the bottom.
1. Get regular sleep (even if it means a sleeping pill, but use as a last resort. I try very hard to use them only after a few restless nights.)
2. No naps. I could stay up all night tossing and turning, and then sleep the afternoon away. If you don't take naps it is easier to sleep.
3. Eat regular meals. - This really helps to even out your emotions.
4. make a list of daily things, brush your teeth, shower, you know the simple things. It is so easy to forget them when you don't care about anything.
5. Get moving, it doesn't have to be wild stuff, go for a walk, clean your house, anything that helps you to be on your feet for more than 1/2 hour.
OKay, I realize I might be telling you stuff you know. I just really want to help. I am a teacher, so I always want to step in and help others. I am just so good at putting myself at the bottom of the list. Any way, back to my list of ideas. Take them or leave them, I just hope it helps a little.
Church- First thing with church is to realize there are all different kinds. You don't have to know all about religion to go. You can try a few different ones tell you find a group you are comfortable with. They don't expect you to know the bible. I grew up going to church and I never read the bible. You will learn a little more each sunday. If you are really determined to learn about the bible, I suggest volunteering to teach a sunday school class. The lessons are prepared before each sunday. You have time to review it. Plus, teaching is a great way to learn something.
If you want to get involved with new people, I suggest looking for volunteer projects in your community. The friends of the library, pet organizations, red cross, and big brother big sister. There are many more organizations out there. Some don't even require much work. It is a good way to meet people who are interested in what you are at the same time you get to help others.
I just know what it is like to be alone, breathe in and out, take it one step at a time. Consider going through some of the action steps in the work book. they are at the end of each section. Your story just really touched me. If you ever want to talk just let me know.
Theresa
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your parents and husband.
I have also faced depression. It is a very hard thing to face. It can bring you down to the bottom and make you feel like there is never anything more. I am not convinced that I am done with depression, but I am starting to feel better. I am in week three. Practicing the self talk is definatly helping me. I have to remember that the bad things I say to myself do not help me. When I start getting stuck on something that is upsetting, I have two responses, one I journal about it. IF I don't have time I just tell my self it is only thoughts and push it out for a while. You can repeat anything else you want.
I just read your story and I understand about being alone. I lost my job. I am an online college student. Along with my job I lost alot of friends. I talk to my mom a couple times a day on the phone other than that it is just me and my cats. I just wanted to let you know that I understand how bad it can get. I have been there, crying and crying because I couldn't leave this world now. I am like you I wouldn't take my life, but I wouldn't be sad if I just magically vanished. But hopefully we can work on turning things around.
Here are some ideas.
Basic depression survival when I am at the bottom.
1. Get regular sleep (even if it means a sleeping pill, but use as a last resort. I try very hard to use them only after a few restless nights.)
2. No naps. I could stay up all night tossing and turning, and then sleep the afternoon away. If you don't take naps it is easier to sleep.
3. Eat regular meals. - This really helps to even out your emotions.
4. make a list of daily things, brush your teeth, shower, you know the simple things. It is so easy to forget them when you don't care about anything.
5. Get moving, it doesn't have to be wild stuff, go for a walk, clean your house, anything that helps you to be on your feet for more than 1/2 hour.
OKay, I realize I might be telling you stuff you know. I just really want to help. I am a teacher, so I always want to step in and help others. I am just so good at putting myself at the bottom of the list. Any way, back to my list of ideas. Take them or leave them, I just hope it helps a little.
Church- First thing with church is to realize there are all different kinds. You don't have to know all about religion to go. You can try a few different ones tell you find a group you are comfortable with. They don't expect you to know the bible. I grew up going to church and I never read the bible. You will learn a little more each sunday. If you are really determined to learn about the bible, I suggest volunteering to teach a sunday school class. The lessons are prepared before each sunday. You have time to review it. Plus, teaching is a great way to learn something.
If you want to get involved with new people, I suggest looking for volunteer projects in your community. The friends of the library, pet organizations, red cross, and big brother big sister. There are many more organizations out there. Some don't even require much work. It is a good way to meet people who are interested in what you are at the same time you get to help others.
I just know what it is like to be alone, breathe in and out, take it one step at a time. Consider going through some of the action steps in the work book. they are at the end of each section. Your story just really touched me. If you ever want to talk just let me know.
Theresa
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Guest
Hi Theresa, thanks you do help, it gave me a lot of things to try. I am having it hard this week, My husband used to go hunting and this time of year is harder. I will have to look into some of those groups. I love physical things. I guess at week 9 I would have thought I would have been over thins or at least have it at a minimum. I am at work now and still having a hard time. I will re-read your help later too. thanks againTheresa
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Guest
Here is something that helped me overcome the comfort of suicide.....hold onto hope!! Even if it's the size of a pinhole....hold onto hope!!! peace and God bless
1. a letter to God regarding fear
2. a response from God
3. Today's word on trust over fear
4. Today's word on fear
5. Dealing aggressively with fear
How Do I Conquer this Fear?
A Letter to Heaven
Dear Heavenly Father,
I come to you, Lord, hoping you can help me overcome a growing problem. Lately, I’ve felt a growing presence in my life-a menacing presence, an overwhelming uneasiness and I’ve finally figured out what it is. It’s fear. I don’t really know when it started or why, but it’s getting stronger and I’m getting weaker. It has knocked me to my knees and that’s where I am now, Father- on my knees before you. I’ve been trying to figure out what I am afraid of. It’s a lot of things. I am afraid of not measuring up, afraid of making mistakes, afraid of what the future holds, afraid of letting my loved ones down-afraid of letting you down. Father, I know you’ve called me to trust you and that you’ve commissioned me to love boldly. I want to be brave; I want to live fearlessly-but I need your help. Lord, instill me with your courage, for I have none of my own. Fill me with your fortitude, for I am so very weak. Infuse me with the conviction that I can do all things with your help. Train my heart to be brave.
Please take the fear from my heart replace it with confidence and courage to live the life you have called me to.
Tearfully Yours
(Response from God)
How Do I Conquer this Fear?
A Letter from Heaven
Dearest Child of Mine
Come to me, my child, for I desire to gather you in my arms and carry you close to my heart.
The world you live in is a frightening place-for you live in a fallen world and it is under the control of the evil one-but fear has no place in the hearts of my children. Fear is from the evil one and he uses it to cloud your view of my face. The only way to combat your fear is by trusting me. I have not given you a spirit of timidity and fear. Rather, I have given you a spirit of power and love and self-discipline. Always remember that because you are my child, you have already overcome the forces of this world; I am in you, and I am greater than the prince of this world.
As long as I am beside you, you have no reason to fear, for I will help you. And I vow to you, on the life of my own Son, that I will never forsake you and that I will never leave you.
This is my charge: Stand firm in faith in me. Do not be afraid or discouraged. And when fear grips your heart, fix your eyes on my Son and continue to live the life that I have set before you. Do not be distracted by the battle around you; for the battle is not yours but mine, and I will fight it for you.
Trust over Fear
TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe"
(Proverbs 29:25, NIV)
TODAY'S WORD
Fear is one of the enemy's favorite tools to keep us from going forward in our lives. As soon as we make a decision to step out in faith and do what God is telling us to do, immediately the enemy will bring fear. He'll put thoughts in your mind like, "What if I fail? What will others think? Maybe I don't have what it takes." He'll do his best to use fear to try to convince you to shrink back and just stay right where you are.
The Bible tells us that fear is a spirit. It affects your emotions. But when you choose to put your trust in the Lord, no matter how you are feeling, you are combating fear.
Today, I encourage you, don't allow fear to trap you and hold you back. Instead, take a step of faith knowing that God is on your side. He is for you and with you, leading and guiding you in the path of victory all the days of your life!
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
"Heavenly Father, I choose to put my trust in You. I choose to press forward and overcome fear. I believe You have my best interest at heart and know that You are leading me in the paths of righteousness all the days of my life. In Jesus' Name. Amen."
Deal Aggressively with Fear
TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline"
(II Timothy 1:7, NLT)
TODAY'S WORD
So many people today are missing out on God's abundant life of joy, peace, and victory because they keep giving in to fear. They are afraid to make a decision, they are afraid to confront issues, they're afraid to step out in faith, they're afraid of the past, and they're afraid of the future. But as believers, we don't have to live that way.
Fear is not from God. God has given you power, and His power is greater than the power of any of your fears. You have to make a decision to deal aggressively with fear. You can't be passive and expect to live in victory. The only way to conquer fear is to confront it head on. As long as you're running from your fears just ignoring them or sweeping them under the rug, you're not going to get any better. Refusing to deal with fear doesn't make it go away. Instead, be strong-willed and determined knowing that the enemy is defeated. As you declare God's Word that says you can be bold and strong, you'll have the courage to conquer fear and move confidently into the destiny He has in store for you!
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
"Father God, thank You for giving me power to overcome fear. I choose to face fear head on and drive it out of my life. Show me any areas of my life where fear is holding me back so that I can press forward into the life of victory You have for me. In Jesus' Name. Amen."
Resist Fear
TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"Withstand him; be firm in faith [against his onset—rooted, established, strong, immovable, and determined]…"
(I Peter 5:9, AMP)
TODAY'S WORD
The very moment you first feel fear, you have to resist it and act against it. If you make the mistake of dwelling on your fears and start thinking about all the reasons why you can't do what God is telling you to do, then it won't be long before you develop a negative mindset that will make it much more difficult to overcome.
When God told David to go fight Goliath, the Bible says that David moved quickly toward the battlefield. In other words, he didn't think about it. He didn't allow fear to grip his heart and talk him out of it. He just did what God wanted him to do.
So many people today are just sitting on the sidelines of life. They have tremendous potential on the inside, but they keep letting the enemy talk them out of doing what God wants them to do. Every time they get a vision of victory for their life, the enemy brings fear; and they just swallow his lies hook, line, and sinker. Don't let that be you! Instead, obey quickly. Resist fear and boldly embrace everything the Lord has in store for you!
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
"Father God, today I choose to resist fear. I choose Your Word. I choose Your love. I believe that with You, all things are possible. Thank You for giving me the power to live in victory in every area of my life. In Jesus' Name. Amen."
1. a letter to God regarding fear
2. a response from God
3. Today's word on trust over fear
4. Today's word on fear
5. Dealing aggressively with fear
How Do I Conquer this Fear?
A Letter to Heaven
Dear Heavenly Father,
I come to you, Lord, hoping you can help me overcome a growing problem. Lately, I’ve felt a growing presence in my life-a menacing presence, an overwhelming uneasiness and I’ve finally figured out what it is. It’s fear. I don’t really know when it started or why, but it’s getting stronger and I’m getting weaker. It has knocked me to my knees and that’s where I am now, Father- on my knees before you. I’ve been trying to figure out what I am afraid of. It’s a lot of things. I am afraid of not measuring up, afraid of making mistakes, afraid of what the future holds, afraid of letting my loved ones down-afraid of letting you down. Father, I know you’ve called me to trust you and that you’ve commissioned me to love boldly. I want to be brave; I want to live fearlessly-but I need your help. Lord, instill me with your courage, for I have none of my own. Fill me with your fortitude, for I am so very weak. Infuse me with the conviction that I can do all things with your help. Train my heart to be brave.
Please take the fear from my heart replace it with confidence and courage to live the life you have called me to.
Tearfully Yours
(Response from God)
How Do I Conquer this Fear?
A Letter from Heaven
Dearest Child of Mine
Come to me, my child, for I desire to gather you in my arms and carry you close to my heart.
The world you live in is a frightening place-for you live in a fallen world and it is under the control of the evil one-but fear has no place in the hearts of my children. Fear is from the evil one and he uses it to cloud your view of my face. The only way to combat your fear is by trusting me. I have not given you a spirit of timidity and fear. Rather, I have given you a spirit of power and love and self-discipline. Always remember that because you are my child, you have already overcome the forces of this world; I am in you, and I am greater than the prince of this world.
As long as I am beside you, you have no reason to fear, for I will help you. And I vow to you, on the life of my own Son, that I will never forsake you and that I will never leave you.
This is my charge: Stand firm in faith in me. Do not be afraid or discouraged. And when fear grips your heart, fix your eyes on my Son and continue to live the life that I have set before you. Do not be distracted by the battle around you; for the battle is not yours but mine, and I will fight it for you.
Trust over Fear
TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe"
(Proverbs 29:25, NIV)
TODAY'S WORD
Fear is one of the enemy's favorite tools to keep us from going forward in our lives. As soon as we make a decision to step out in faith and do what God is telling us to do, immediately the enemy will bring fear. He'll put thoughts in your mind like, "What if I fail? What will others think? Maybe I don't have what it takes." He'll do his best to use fear to try to convince you to shrink back and just stay right where you are.
The Bible tells us that fear is a spirit. It affects your emotions. But when you choose to put your trust in the Lord, no matter how you are feeling, you are combating fear.
Today, I encourage you, don't allow fear to trap you and hold you back. Instead, take a step of faith knowing that God is on your side. He is for you and with you, leading and guiding you in the path of victory all the days of your life!
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
"Heavenly Father, I choose to put my trust in You. I choose to press forward and overcome fear. I believe You have my best interest at heart and know that You are leading me in the paths of righteousness all the days of my life. In Jesus' Name. Amen."
Deal Aggressively with Fear
TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline"
(II Timothy 1:7, NLT)
TODAY'S WORD
So many people today are missing out on God's abundant life of joy, peace, and victory because they keep giving in to fear. They are afraid to make a decision, they are afraid to confront issues, they're afraid to step out in faith, they're afraid of the past, and they're afraid of the future. But as believers, we don't have to live that way.
Fear is not from God. God has given you power, and His power is greater than the power of any of your fears. You have to make a decision to deal aggressively with fear. You can't be passive and expect to live in victory. The only way to conquer fear is to confront it head on. As long as you're running from your fears just ignoring them or sweeping them under the rug, you're not going to get any better. Refusing to deal with fear doesn't make it go away. Instead, be strong-willed and determined knowing that the enemy is defeated. As you declare God's Word that says you can be bold and strong, you'll have the courage to conquer fear and move confidently into the destiny He has in store for you!
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
"Father God, thank You for giving me power to overcome fear. I choose to face fear head on and drive it out of my life. Show me any areas of my life where fear is holding me back so that I can press forward into the life of victory You have for me. In Jesus' Name. Amen."
Resist Fear
TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"Withstand him; be firm in faith [against his onset—rooted, established, strong, immovable, and determined]…"
(I Peter 5:9, AMP)
TODAY'S WORD
The very moment you first feel fear, you have to resist it and act against it. If you make the mistake of dwelling on your fears and start thinking about all the reasons why you can't do what God is telling you to do, then it won't be long before you develop a negative mindset that will make it much more difficult to overcome.
When God told David to go fight Goliath, the Bible says that David moved quickly toward the battlefield. In other words, he didn't think about it. He didn't allow fear to grip his heart and talk him out of it. He just did what God wanted him to do.
So many people today are just sitting on the sidelines of life. They have tremendous potential on the inside, but they keep letting the enemy talk them out of doing what God wants them to do. Every time they get a vision of victory for their life, the enemy brings fear; and they just swallow his lies hook, line, and sinker. Don't let that be you! Instead, obey quickly. Resist fear and boldly embrace everything the Lord has in store for you!
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
"Father God, today I choose to resist fear. I choose Your Word. I choose Your love. I believe that with You, all things are possible. Thank You for giving me the power to live in victory in every area of my life. In Jesus' Name. Amen."
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Guest
Hello lost one,
I don't usually reply to posts, but yours touched my heart and reminded me of what I have gone through. I had what is called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It took me years of going to doctors and therapy before someone said those words to me. I am one of those people that look up everything and read all I can in order to find a solution. I found audio tapes and books on trauma at my library and worked with them everyday. I also got guided imagery audios to listen to. They helped me relax and that helped with the stress I was going through. It didn't happen over night, but I now wake up with a purpose. When I am done with this program I have plenty of other things that I know I can and will do. Going out and actually making frieds will be one of them.
You said you have always been a follower. I noticed that you have children. They, at one time in their lives, had to follow you. The fact that they are there for you now tells me you did a good job raising them. One reason I worked as hard as I did to get well was for my grandchildren. I didn't want them to have a depressed and angry grandmother. I wanted to have the energy to spend time with them as I remember my grandmother doing. I am able to do that now. Perhaps not as much as I would like, but as long as we have some fun together it is good.
You are needed and loved. Look into learning about how to overcome the trauma, Life is still there for you. It is a chance to live it a little differantly than you did before.
This program is another thing that has helped me take a giant leap out of depression. I knew that I had a problem with negative thinking. I needed some help in what to do about it. I am getting that here.
Comfort yourself as you would comfort your children.
I hope this helps you
Sews
I don't usually reply to posts, but yours touched my heart and reminded me of what I have gone through. I had what is called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It took me years of going to doctors and therapy before someone said those words to me. I am one of those people that look up everything and read all I can in order to find a solution. I found audio tapes and books on trauma at my library and worked with them everyday. I also got guided imagery audios to listen to. They helped me relax and that helped with the stress I was going through. It didn't happen over night, but I now wake up with a purpose. When I am done with this program I have plenty of other things that I know I can and will do. Going out and actually making frieds will be one of them.
You said you have always been a follower. I noticed that you have children. They, at one time in their lives, had to follow you. The fact that they are there for you now tells me you did a good job raising them. One reason I worked as hard as I did to get well was for my grandchildren. I didn't want them to have a depressed and angry grandmother. I wanted to have the energy to spend time with them as I remember my grandmother doing. I am able to do that now. Perhaps not as much as I would like, but as long as we have some fun together it is good.
You are needed and loved. Look into learning about how to overcome the trauma, Life is still there for you. It is a chance to live it a little differantly than you did before.
This program is another thing that has helped me take a giant leap out of depression. I knew that I had a problem with negative thinking. I needed some help in what to do about it. I am getting that here.
Comfort yourself as you would comfort your children.
I hope this helps you
Sews
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Guest