Depression after victory

Charlie Brown · Post by **Charlie Brown** » Thu Oct 09, 2008 3:50 pm

How can a person achieve a victory and soon after get depression? I recall a prophet in the Old Testament who had a great victory and soon afterwards went into deep depression. I feel like that individual, though I am not so deeply depressed.

Tuesday I resigned from my job which I disliked. (I start a new one--in behavioral health--on Monday.) I resigned the way I wanted to--with a completely honest letter. I was strutting at work that morning, saying good bye to coworkers, feeling almost like on a high. Later that night I started getting harrassing calls from the bank, I had a couple of minor tiffs with my wife, and my loud-mouth neighbor was cursing in his adjacent apartment. Since then to right now, I have been dealing with and fighting off depression/sadness, fatigue, lack of interest in a personal project that I now have the time for, achiness, and tiredness.

Now these may have been the triggers but the bank has stopped calling (and I will be switching banks), my wife and I are lovey-dovey again, and my neighbor is behaving himself. And I still feel a little down and also feel bad because I feel bad. I am also planning on going back on Lexapro.

Again: how can you go from victory to depression?

Thanks.

Jeremy · Post by **Jeremy** » Thu Oct 09, 2008 5:21 pm

first of all, congrats on the job. . . .

now, to answer your question: we don't stay "high" all the time. it's a fact of life.

remember session 4/expect less and get more? perhaps you were expecting too much from the job change. but that's alright--there are good things to come. . . . also review the effects of stress (both "good" and "bad") for example, "big" things--such as job transition wear us out a bit, which means we have to go a bit easy on ourselves. so don't beat yourself up!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Oct 09, 2008 5:36 pm

Thanks so much MC Grace for the reply and the well-wishes.

Maybe I was subconsciously expecting the "high" to last longer. There were those triggers, but this unhappiness is lasting longer and is so out of left field. I

I never heard of job transition. Thanks for that and

so don't beat yourself up!

BTW: I like your signature quote.

rose_thorn98 · Post by **rose_thorn98** » Thu Oct 09, 2008 6:00 pm

I got to thinking about going easy on ourselves and no self-beating up. I just realized some things I DID get done today in spite of my emotions. They included writing a creditor for an itemized bill, deciding on a name for my online project (something I wasn't able to do way before I was down), picking a replacement bank, having the super come up to fix a light switch (this was an achievement considering how alone I wanted to be today) and eyeing a new online business on eBay. Granted I didn't spend as much time as I would have preferred but I have to remember how I had been feeling and at least yesterday wasn't a total emotional washout. Yesterday afternoon I even went out for a latte late in the afternoon and was pleasantly surprised Donkin Donuts has my favorite seasonal flavor: pumpkin.

I also prayed as I feel asleep for a nap, "I don't know why I am going thru this after a great moment, but I trust You."

Scott B · Post by **Scott B** » Fri Oct 10, 2008 8:22 am

sounds good!

Iwillbeatthis · Post by **Iwillbeatthis** » Fri Oct 10, 2008 9:10 am

Thank you Pecos for replying to my post. I read it and thought it was very good advice, so I did review session 14. It was helpful, and I certainly see that I need to pay attention to the automatic thoughts that just appear in my mind. Unfortunately, when I am depressed, those thoughts seem like "facts" to me, and because I FEEL that way, it is hard to convince myself that it is just depression distorting things and "tricking " me. But I am working on it, and I am happy to say that I do not feel as badly as I did when I sent the post last Monday. In looking for a "cause", I can see that there is a direct correlation between dealing with the incest in therapy, and the onset of the worsening of my depression. So many of the erroneous thoughts that I have I can directly trace to the things that I told myself at such an early age...things that I needed to tell myself in order to survive. It is crystal clear to me, but that doesn't make it any easier to look at all the connections (in an emotional sense), but I am determined to live the best life that I can, and I will do whatever it takes to get better. I pray that I be given the strength and courage, and I also know that this group is a Godsend to all of us who deal with depression, no matter how, when or where that depression manifests itself. So thank you to everyone, but especially to you, Pecos. I am continuing on, and will let you know how it is going.