Really sad- need advice

Angels-R-4-Me · Post by **Angels-R-4-Me** » Mon Sep 22, 2008 4:14 pm

I feel like I am going crazy. My family have all told me that it is in my head. They do not seem to understand what I am going through and they do not care. They have all shut the door on me. I am the youngest of 3. My sister can do no wrong. My mom baby's her. My brother is only 18 months older than me, mom babies him also. She treats me like crap. I feel like I am not loved and believe me when I say not loved it is true. I am so depressed right now all I do is cry all day long.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 22, 2008 4:30 pm

I'm sure your Mom loves you. Maybe she thinks the other two are not as strong as you and so she gives them more attention. Tell her how you feel.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 22, 2008 4:56 pm

Hugs Angel.
So, which question do you want answered?
How about I answer the second one.
Yes, you will be OK.
Now the first one, Nope you're not going crazy.
But it sounds like it's difficult for you to comfort yourself.
Hugs to you sweetie, and because I've been there, and so have thousands of us, I'm leaping right into this. It IS in our heads as far as how we deal with life, how we cope, or don't. It's negative thinking habits about ourselves and whatever else that gets us anxious and depressed.
And No, they (your family)probably don't understand and/or some of them feel the same way but won't admit to it. It's most likely NOT that they don't care, they just don't know what to do to help you and so they avoid it and chose not to deal with it. Sort of self protection and sort of running from the pain of it. Nobody likes to see their child -no matter what age-in emotional pain and some people get so frightened they get angry and push away. They don't know how to cope with it.
Just like, right now, like many of us were or still are, you don't know how to cope with your own thoughts and feelings.
If you don't have this program, get it.
Hugs again.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:26 pm

You're not going crazy, but if anyone can push your buttons it's family. The good news is the more you learn, and grow, those buttons will shift, and they won't be able to do that anymore.
I could type volumes on how family tries to "help." For now don't worry about them.
Do the things you need to do for yourself.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 2:42 am

Thank you so much. It really means alot to me to have someone on here who understands and cares about me. God Bless You

BMW26 · Post by **BMW26** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 2:58 am

Cindylou, Thank you. I do have the program. I am only on week 4. Can not seem to get out of it I get stuck it seems like on each new one I start. I was on week 2 for 2 weeks. I am still unsure of that one. I am so scared and upset everyday. All I do is cry all day long. I have had Panic disorder for 13 years. They will put me on meds for a while they will work for a while then my body gets used to them. Then I have to start a new one, and the whole prosses starts all over again.I have been on every SSRI'S out there. So yes I am really hoping this program will help me and make me better soon. Thank you and God Bless you.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:03 am

Worryfree, I have tried to talk to my mom many many times. It does no good. She does not love me it is as simple as that. I am what they the accident they did not want me and she has told me that many times. So I have know one to lean on here in the south. I have tried to find someone that maybe lives down here but it seems everyone is all over no where near me. Thank you and God Bless

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:10 am

Hello Angels-R-4-Me,

You are doing a positive thing by posting how you feel..good for you!!

We can't change other people or their actions but we can change how we let them affect our thoughts. I know how it feels to not feel as loved as my siblings and this was a huge problem for me and part of the cause of my anxiety, stress and depression..for sure. I was the eldest by 5 years and then 16 years. My mother was very hard on me throughout most of my life. I finally had to just let it go. I now have a good relationship with her and she encourages me and does all the things I wish she had done over my childhood and earlier adult years but she didn't so being not able to change that or change all past issues I'm just working on ME and how not to let others get to me. It's a waste of precious time and energy and soooooooo bad for us/me.

Learn to comfort yourself...love yourself...like yourself...be kind, caring and compassionate to yourself and above all try to think positive thoughts and know in your heart what a good person you are and tell yourself this in place of the negative thoughts about not feeling loved or cared about by others. It's not easy but I know you can do this...thousands of us have and are every day!!

We are all here to assisit you at any time and most know where you are coming from.

I realy feel your pain BUT find that inner strength and use it to soothe yourself. Do something nice..JUST FOR YOU!!!

Believe in YOU, once you start to BELIEVE in yourself many issues will stop or you will see things differently and if you don't have this program...get it...it's helped me in just a couple of weeks.

<span class="ev_code_PURPLE">(((((BIG GENTLE HUGS TO YOU)))))</span>

My Thoughts Are With You As Are Prayers.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:26 am

Originally posted by Angels-R-4-Me:
Worryfree, I have tried to talk to my mom many many times. It does no good. She does not love me it is as simple as that. I am what they the accident they did not want me and she has told me that many times. So I have know one to lean on here in the south. I have tried to find someone that maybe lives down here but it seems everyone is all over no where near me. Thank you and God Bless

Oh hunny I just am at a loss right now as to how to make you feel better. I wish I was close enough to just hold you and love you as I would my own child. I'm not so all I can do is keep writing to you and trying to get you to think about the most important thing right now..YOU!

As a Mom of 2 I just can't imagine a mother saying those words to their child. It's not your fault..PLEASE TRY TO SEE THAT...It's nothing you did wrong. Be thankfull that you are here on this planet earth with a wonderfull life ahead of you if you want it. You can learn how to better deal with this pain and hurt and come out ahead. I'm not meaning to downplay how you feel so please don't take it like that. I could tell you so many things I went through at the hands and anger of my mother and I'm almost 54 now. Please PM me and I will try my best to help you take baby steps and see you aren't alone with this type of hurt.

Also you might greatly benefit from a counseller if you can get to a good one. Are you on any meds for depression, anxiety and stress ???

If not it may help to get you heading in the positive direction.

You know we all have or had broken wings and must learn to fly again and that's why we are here.. to learn how and to heal ourselves.

Everyone here does care and will help in any way they can.

Deb

Debbie Gal · Post by **Debbie Gal** » Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:35 am

Monty's mom, Thank you so much for the encourgement. I am really trying hard. I do have the program. I just wish I could understand it more. Thank you for being so kind to me. God bless you.