Dealing with isolation

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Apr 06, 2009 5:32 am

Hi Mary, I really don't go hiking, just with my wife and daughter, pretty light stuff. did a lot when I was young, then got into mountainbiking back in '85 and enjoy that more. Mountain biking has been my primary hobby since then. I biked with the bike club some, but they start on rides before I can get there from work so I end up only doing that when they are close enough to get to the ride after work. that ends up maybe twice a year. believe it or not, there aren't any groups that bike on the weekend regularly (mountainbiking) because the people are too busy on the weekends to be committed to rides. And I have searched. I'm getting older and don't do the 20-40 mile rides anymore. I seem to be caught between the young super riders, and the very casual almost never ride crowds. I don't fit into either one of those two catagories. Wonderful question though, I thank you for your suggestion/ideas, it deserves some thought.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Apr 06, 2009 5:38 am

Hi designkid, Yeah the self motivation is tough. Yes even thinking on making plans is stimulating. I had gotten to the point where I would give out a business type card with my phone and a get together message to other riders I would talk to on the trail. Never have gotten a call back for a ride from that idea. I did get dissapointed in that and haven't come up with any new ideas. I think I felt a little bit rejected.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Apr 09, 2009 1:11 am

Rejection is so tough...
Having reached out to 7 different people since I've moved here, trying to make plans for meeting for coffee or something small, I know all about rejection. None of those 7 came through. I think I crawled into my shell for a good while after that. People aren't in my control. I can't make them like me, I can only try to reach out. All I can say is thank goodness for Skype internet phone so I can phone my friends back home for not much $!

I've never had social anxiety really, I'm more the other extreme: socially addicted. But I am 75% better than I used to be.

One thing I really love about this program is how it helps us become so much more comfortable with ourselves and our own company! I'm also so glad these forums exist so we can all talk with each other about these issues.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Apr 12, 2009 11:50 am

This concept of becoming my own safe person, being comfortable being alone with myself seems to be key in overcoming anxiety. It seems the anxiety makes it difficult to be separated from people because of the negative thinking and feelings of rejection. For the same reason anxiety makes it difficult to be around people because of the negative thinking and fear of rejection.