Aftershocks from ex-husband
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TexMexChica
- Posts: 1
- Joined: Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:29 pm
Help! i'm having a hard time! the last fews days i've been struggling with the idea of my ex-husband (been divorced since june) with someone he met in july and is still with. I don't even think about him, like missing him or anything, just the thought of someone else doing for him what i couldn't or him wanting something else. this is so pointless and crazy considering I've met a wonderful man and really love his heart and all he has to give. I don't miss my ex in a "I want you back way" i just get nostalgic and it gets me so down. I know I'm not the first person to get a divorce and feel this way, right? How can I talk myself out of this useless feelings? sorry.help. feeling lost today.
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Guest
The aftershocks........been there done that. I wish it was easy........I wan engaged to a man for 7 years and we split up a year ago this month. (I've been married twice) I am just now at a place in my heart that I feel good about and I think this program is really helping. For the last year we (me and him) have been back and forth; on again off again........and that is truly not the answer. This man doesn't understand me or who I am. It just tells me when "I'm not crazy, I am a wonderful person". We all change and grow in different directions; so it isn't about what you could or couldn't do for him. We just change and want different things. It is still so new for you, you have already met someone........just be careful......pray about it. God got me through so much. God has a plan for you......just believe and trust in him. Stay with the program..........it's all about the positive self talk. Hope this helps and have a blessed day.
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Guest
Hi TexMexChica,
Been there done it many years ago!!
I really think it's a common problem and we feel what we feel. All I can suggest is don't beat yourself up over these emotions. Write everything you are feeling down in black and white, read it as many times as you feel you need to...also write down why you were divorced in the first place and read those words...then write down all the great positives about the man you love now and just seeing all this may be just what you need to be able to let go, bring closure to the past and move on with your future.
Time also heals all wounds but if we are stuck in our past how can we enjoy the present moments and enjoy the new lives we have or are creating!!
Hope it helps!
Been there done it many years ago!!
I really think it's a common problem and we feel what we feel. All I can suggest is don't beat yourself up over these emotions. Write everything you are feeling down in black and white, read it as many times as you feel you need to...also write down why you were divorced in the first place and read those words...then write down all the great positives about the man you love now and just seeing all this may be just what you need to be able to let go, bring closure to the past and move on with your future.
Time also heals all wounds but if we are stuck in our past how can we enjoy the present moments and enjoy the new lives we have or are creating!!
Hope it helps!
All you have to do is, every time you get nostalgic and your mind goes to this jealousy, think about the divorce. Think about how you didn't get along and how the two of you are not right for each other. Also think about that great man that you have now and allow yourself to feel blessed that you have a good man that you get along with because that's hard to find these days. You are not missing anything. Let this man go. Let that other woman have him. You're doing great without him. Start honoring the man you have by not letting your ex "rent space in your head" because I'm sure that new man could use the attention that you're giving to someone else's relationship. Take care of yourself and realize how truly blessed you are.