Trouble kicking Neg. speech pattern

k.rae · Post by **k.rae** » Sat Sep 27, 2008 12:14 pm

I loved session 3. I actually really got into writing down the negative and changing them into positives. I've kept it up and it's empowering. Where I keep getting tripped up is when I speak to people in person. If I write things down, then I have time to be quiet and think about things. When I'm speaking with someone, I don't have that so I fall into, what I call, hedging my bets. If someone asks me how I am, I say "I'm ok", then I either think about or talk about all the things that could be better. If education comes up I explain that I only have two two-year degrees and that that doesn't count for anything. Every conversation devolves into cascading negativity and I feel exhausted and guilty afterwards.

I'll keep doing the writing exercises, but does anyone have any tips for changing speech patterns?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 04, 2008 3:56 am

I'm about to start session 3. When you're talking to someone and you feel a negative thought arising, mentally block it right away and say the complete opposite. If you let that one negative thought come through, sure enough, many more will follow. If someone asks how you are, you can say, "I'm fine. Isn't the weather great today?" If the weather isn't, then, "boy am I glad to be indoors where it's much cooler/warmer than out there." This is something small but you want to set your mind on the path of positive thinking. And about your education-- two associate degrees is a big accomplishment. Many people don't attempt/complete a higher education. What also helps too is before you reply to someone's question, take a moment before answering. This will give you time to be aware of what you're thinking and what you're about to say. If it's negative, mentally block it out and say the opposite. It takes practice as it's hard to stop a habit. Good luck to you!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:07 pm

Hi There-

I'm absolutely in the same place. I'm such a pesimist and negative talker and thinker. It drives my family crazy (especially my mom and husband). It is hard to stop and yes, it is a habit. I will work with you on the progress. Maybe we can share the accomplishments together. Thanks for asking - it is helpful to know we are not alone in our journey. -J

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Oct 07, 2008 4:19 pm

Hello- Well, I'm in week 3 now and have had a struggle with being positive also. But, what i've been doing is sadly, avoid people that are negative if even are my friends, and to ignore or distract myself so that I don't overanalyze the negative comment someone said or that I said. Then, the day gets easier because I realize that there's more to life than just worrying about what people say. There is so much negativity in today's world that its no wonder we are going crazy! haha- not literally, but we need to learn to not be like these people, and let's stop beating up ourselves!
~Jason