I will recover, I am recovering, each and everything i do makes me more recovered. I will do everything I possibly can to recover in the healthiest way because I refuse to live a life based on fear, anxiety and depression anymore.
I am so excited about this new week, I just wanted to post my progress for this past weekend.
Saturday started as any regular Saturday, it usually is a very lazy day for me and my husband. We have tons of things to do, however we don't seem to get the energy to do anything.
I was watching TV, a program about Hoarders. I guess we felt guilty about just watching TV while there were so many things to get done that we decided to clean the garage. We did a great job, our son helped and we all had a nice time focusing on that task.
I was confused about the diner at my sister-in-law's home, it was Sunday, not Saturday. I told my husband that I was not sure if I was attending. I told him that I would drive myself and see how far I would make it. Well, I made it all the way to my in-laws. I went inside the house and everybody was surprised to see me there. The anxiety was manageable. I had something to eat and socialize for about 1 hour, then I decided to go back home. I feel very proud of myself, it was a good test. I am confident that next time I will be able to stay a little longer.
I want to thank all of your for being here, for being so good listeners and so supportive. Now I am sure that we will get better.
Mike,
Thanks for all your posts, you keep me on track and I really appreciate it. Please don't feel bad if someone is not a consistent as others, each person has to find their own pace. The only thing we can do is to be here to listen and offer support. How thing went with your friend?... Were you able to clear thing?
Jamie,
I am glad that you feel you can be open about how you feel. You are great supporting people, I am happy we can be there for you. You have challenged yourself and you have made progress. Congratulations. Remember, baby steps.
Sometimes I catch myself dwelling on past mistakes too, now I change what I am thinking as soon as I'm aware of those sad or guilty feelings. Is a process, first being aware of what we are thinking, then changing it when we are aware. I think in a future we'll be able to not dwell and keep a positive thinking.
ArtmistressLisa,
You are welcomed, we all know the feeling of anxiety. Keep working on getting better.
THH,
I meditate too, I learned Transendental Meditation and it has helped me. I still have problems finding the time and the space to meditate, but I'm working on it.
Lindalee,
It is great that you are riding again. Congratulations!!!
I have been using a hypnosis CD, by Steven Gurgevich. It has helped me. It is good to add some variety to your relaxation time. The idea at the end is to train your mind and your body on how to relax and be in calm.
JJ,
I'm glad your join us.
I have noticed that if I use the relaxation CD before a nap, and if I set my alarm for about 1 hour, I am able to wake up without anxiety.
Ready for a new week?????
I can't wait.
Have a great day.
Hope
The Challenge...Lesson 2
Sunday a wierd thing happened to me. I was at a super store check out lane, and a young boy maybe 9-13? cut in looking at all the gum. I ask him "whats the best gum" He said he has to have sugarless gum because of his diabitis. I saod " whats the best sugarless gum". He said this one, but I only have .50. So I reached into my pocket and told him today is you luicky day, get the one you want, I'll buy your gum.
He was thrilled. So I'm waiting to finnish ringing up all my stuff, and his mother comes to the end of the line. She screams out his name. The kid took off running... He comes back asking me to tell his mom that I offered to buy his gum, that he didn't ask me too, I thought oh boy, now what did I start???? SO I find his mom and told her the whole thing and she says I really don't like it. I said " Its just a pack of gum" I thought it was a act of kindness. I didn't mean to step on anyones toes. She looked mad and I left.
I have gone to car washes and someone leaves a quarter setting there, Or been out to eat and a friend at the counter picks up the tab. To me it is a act of kindness that very often brightens a persons day.
I think for me, doing kind things even so small, makes me feel good. And being on the recieving end, I have felt that little lift of thanks. It bothered me that I may have gotten the boy in trouble, and didn't think in my farthest thoughts that could of happened. I am npt going to change and not offer to do things because of that one reaction.
Mike when I get in those down moods, I start being thankful. It puts me into another frame of thinking and I do have sooo many things to be thankful for.
Just another tool to use. For me it not only gives me somtheing to think about in a positive sense, but it blocks those poor me, I'm not good enough things too. Its hard! But so worth doing. Because we are changing, we are becoming the people we want to be, the old ways don't work anymore, we need growth from with in to face our fears that hold us back.
mcshope, Good for you!!!Great on driving, and going to dinner, going home. Thats what you set out to do and did it. YAY! Take your bow!
Thank you for being here too, sharing your good days and acompishments.
He was thrilled. So I'm waiting to finnish ringing up all my stuff, and his mother comes to the end of the line. She screams out his name. The kid took off running... He comes back asking me to tell his mom that I offered to buy his gum, that he didn't ask me too, I thought oh boy, now what did I start???? SO I find his mom and told her the whole thing and she says I really don't like it. I said " Its just a pack of gum" I thought it was a act of kindness. I didn't mean to step on anyones toes. She looked mad and I left.
I have gone to car washes and someone leaves a quarter setting there, Or been out to eat and a friend at the counter picks up the tab. To me it is a act of kindness that very often brightens a persons day.
I think for me, doing kind things even so small, makes me feel good. And being on the recieving end, I have felt that little lift of thanks. It bothered me that I may have gotten the boy in trouble, and didn't think in my farthest thoughts that could of happened. I am npt going to change and not offer to do things because of that one reaction.
Mike when I get in those down moods, I start being thankful. It puts me into another frame of thinking and I do have sooo many things to be thankful for.
Just another tool to use. For me it not only gives me somtheing to think about in a positive sense, but it blocks those poor me, I'm not good enough things too. Its hard! But so worth doing. Because we are changing, we are becoming the people we want to be, the old ways don't work anymore, we need growth from with in to face our fears that hold us back.
YOU BET CHA!!!!You following suit with my wishing a brighter future for everybody?
mcshope, Good for you!!!Great on driving, and going to dinner, going home. Thats what you set out to do and did it. YAY! Take your bow!
Thank you for being here too, sharing your good days and acompishments.
It is sad to hear how much our society has changed that we do not appreciate other people's kindness. I think what you did was very sweet, and don't stop doing nice things for others just because of this. Maybe the mother was having a bad day herself.
I agree with you, sometimes doing positive things for others helps us to feel better.
Thank you for your comments, I feel happy for my accomplishment.
I agree with you, sometimes doing positive things for others helps us to feel better.
Thank you for your comments, I feel happy for my accomplishment.
"Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, it empties today of its strength." – Unknown
-
NinjaFrodo
- Posts: 1263
- Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2004 3:00 am
I will recover, I am recovering, each and everything I do makes me more recovered. I will do everything I possibly can to recover in the healthiest way because I refuse to live a life based on fear, anxiety and depression anymore. How I did things in the past doesn't work anymore
Mcshope
I'm excited about the new week as well. Its going to be more experiences, more action assignments to try out and more progress for everybody.
I've seen Hoarders before. Its an intresting show and I get overwhelmed just looking at those people's places. Thats great that it got you to take action instead of just feeling bad and getting into that victim thinking. You also had fun doing it! Thats an awesome accomplishment!!!
You actually made it to your in-laws! Awe I'm so proud of you, I know that was not an easy task for you to achieve but you still did it! It is also good you didn't force yourself to stay longer as well and still went with your limitations. I'm actually finding out today the importance of doing so. I have actually had the problem of facing my limitation and keeping myself in there for a long period of time without allowing myself to rest or anything like that. I'm noticing that even though i face my limitations, it becomes counter-productive and I actually feel less confident.
Yes your right this isn't a race or competition and people have to do things at their own pace. I'm realizing and accepting this now. Thats funny how you worded that...was i able to clear thing
Well the trust was shaken and it will affect the friendship but we are talking at least on facebook right now so its getting resolved.
By the way you may want to space things out a little more especially when you are directing parts of the post to people. They may not see their names otherwise.
THH
Wow that is a strange thing to happen. There could be many diffrent reasons as to why the mother reacted that way. The boy may end up doing that often and get money out of people that way, the mother could have insecurity feelings about accepting anything from anybody (this happens alot when there is a lack of trust possibly from being abused during childhood), it could make the mother feel bad about their financial situation, there could be a belief that the mother has which says to do everything independant and not take things from people, there could also be guilt and she may feel that she doesn't deserve help from others..etc, etc. So many diffrent reasons and by the sounds of it you seem to be blaming yourself for how she reacted. It is an act of kindness because that is the intention you had when you did it however, people think in irrational ways and you can put 1000 people in the same situation and get 1000 diffrent results and ways of thinking/behaving. This is a problem with the way she thinks, not how you think.
Hmm i could try focusing on the things that make me greatful and thankful. I'll give that a try next time. It is an old way isn't it? Well put. Alright well i'm going to continue to become the person i want to be then and use the greatful thing when i feel depressed for no reason.
Mike
Mcshope
I'm excited about the new week as well. Its going to be more experiences, more action assignments to try out and more progress for everybody.
I've seen Hoarders before. Its an intresting show and I get overwhelmed just looking at those people's places. Thats great that it got you to take action instead of just feeling bad and getting into that victim thinking. You also had fun doing it! Thats an awesome accomplishment!!!
You actually made it to your in-laws! Awe I'm so proud of you, I know that was not an easy task for you to achieve but you still did it! It is also good you didn't force yourself to stay longer as well and still went with your limitations. I'm actually finding out today the importance of doing so. I have actually had the problem of facing my limitation and keeping myself in there for a long period of time without allowing myself to rest or anything like that. I'm noticing that even though i face my limitations, it becomes counter-productive and I actually feel less confident.
Yes your right this isn't a race or competition and people have to do things at their own pace. I'm realizing and accepting this now. Thats funny how you worded that...was i able to clear thing
Well the trust was shaken and it will affect the friendship but we are talking at least on facebook right now so its getting resolved.By the way you may want to space things out a little more especially when you are directing parts of the post to people. They may not see their names otherwise.
THH
Wow that is a strange thing to happen. There could be many diffrent reasons as to why the mother reacted that way. The boy may end up doing that often and get money out of people that way, the mother could have insecurity feelings about accepting anything from anybody (this happens alot when there is a lack of trust possibly from being abused during childhood), it could make the mother feel bad about their financial situation, there could be a belief that the mother has which says to do everything independant and not take things from people, there could also be guilt and she may feel that she doesn't deserve help from others..etc, etc. So many diffrent reasons and by the sounds of it you seem to be blaming yourself for how she reacted. It is an act of kindness because that is the intention you had when you did it however, people think in irrational ways and you can put 1000 people in the same situation and get 1000 diffrent results and ways of thinking/behaving. This is a problem with the way she thinks, not how you think.
Hmm i could try focusing on the things that make me greatful and thankful. I'll give that a try next time. It is an old way isn't it? Well put. Alright well i'm going to continue to become the person i want to be then and use the greatful thing when i feel depressed for no reason.
Mike
Here is the link to the Letting Go thread which is designated for venting
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
-
NinjaFrodo
- Posts: 1263
- Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2004 3:00 am
I will recover, I am recovering, each and everyday I am more recovered. I have everything I need inside me in order to recover and face any problem or limitation I will ever encounter. Each day I become stronger with my skills and I can access more and more of my inner resources
This will be the new affirmation for the new week! Or you can choose to continue with the old one, it is your choice!
Mike
This will be the new affirmation for the new week! Or you can choose to continue with the old one, it is your choice!
Mike
Here is the link to the Letting Go thread which is designated for venting
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
-
NinjaFrodo
- Posts: 1263
- Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2004 3:00 am
I will recover, I am recovering, each and everyday I am more recovered. I have everything I need inside of me in order to recover and face any problem or limitation I will ever encounter. Each day I become stronger with my skills and I can access more and more of my inner resources
Monday; (last day of the first week)
Practice opportunities
1)I was transfering my workout information from my old journal (which is in a duotang) to my new journal which is a medium sized spiral notepad. The duotang is too flimsy and will easily fall apart so it is important for me to do this. I was writing the information into the new book and I think i must have done it for at least an hour before I started to feel the anxiety and it was building fast. I was starting to feel panicky and got thoughts that this would be a never ending activity and that I would get those anxious feelings and obsessive thoughts and endure them for hours and hours on end and feel horrible about myself, guilty and extremely exhausted. It also didn't help that I tried to listen to my affirmations and write at the same time. I used the 6 steps to calm myself down. I breathed slow, I asked myself what is wrong and my answer was that I was afraid that I would be forcing myself into doing something for hours and hours again and not let myself rest. I used self-talk to tell myself that I was in control and tried to continue with the writing but my anxiety didn't lighten up.
So I decided this would be a great time to bust out the action assignments. I took out that blue rock which is my symbol to slow down my breathing, my thoughts, and my actions. It slightly helped a bit and so I decided to write out my negative thoughts and I also took out the calming pictures and focused on them for awhile. I wasn't completely better with the pictures but it did make a big impact on my anxiety level as I was trying to focus on what it would be like to be in those places that were in the pictures. I then replaced my thoughts and did breathing techniques and told myself that alright I'm going to listen to my limitations and use this situation as a practice opportunity. I was alot more calm but getting anxious about going back to doing the activity. I went back and noticed that I wasn't as panicky but I had also decided the next set of overwhelming feelings, I am going to stop the activity and just go back to it tomorrow. I think i wrote for another 5 or 10 minutes and then got overwhelmed and stopped. It was a great learning experience though on how to approach limitations and I was feeling a little less satisfied with my efforts when it came to my limitations because I have avoided them many times when going through the program.
This anxiety attack has shown me that I have been treating myself the way I was taught as a child to just ignore your needs and just do what people tell you to do. In that moment I saw myself as a child and my adult self punishing the child me and pushing him to do more and more without any kind of recognition for his accomplishments and that child crying and becoming all depressed. Like my actual situation in my past where my mother broke that trust with me (at least in this way), I had broken that trust with myself. I haven't trusted myself for a very long time and in a way I was abusing myself. I broke my trust by pushing myself too much and ignoring myself, I've broken my word when I would say I would do something important and didn't, I broke it when I would be late after telling myself I'd be on time, I broke that trust everytime I would say I would go to bed at a particular time and then that time would pass and instead of going to bed when I was tired I would go to bed when I was exhausted. There are so many other things i've done to break this trust and now the inner me is crying. I need to rebuild this trust within myself again.
Lesson 2 cd
Listened to it and what jumped out at me this time is when dr.Fisher said that its really hard to give yourself to anybody in anyway when you cannot get ahold of your own thoughts and feelings. So once we get ahold of them then how we relate changes and it'll be easier to be there for someone...that is what I got out of that. I also thought more about Carolyn talking about the puddling feeling. I think i switch between that and the outright fear.
Relaxation
Relaxation cd in the am;
I had an extremely difficult time staying focused today. I kept having obsessive thoughts about how exhausted and anxious I was feeling. The relaxation cd wasn't as effective this time around but it helped a little bit.
Negative thoughts
1)It's going to take forever to finish transfering this information over to my notepad.
->It may take time to transfer all the info but it certainly won't take forever, I didn't write down that much in my duotang. I'm in control of how much I do at once and I don't have to get it all done right now. I can take breaks, I can split it up to do a little each day as well. I'm going to listen to my limits, relax when I need to and go back to it later.
2)Whats wrong with me? Why am I getting so anxious, I'm just writing.
->Whats bothering me is that I'm afraid of pushing myself into doing the task well beyond my limit and feeling extremely panicky and stressed the whole time that I do that. Historically, I have pushed myself to do things for up to 16 hours at a time without allowing myself to relax and just tried to ignore how I felt. I am in control of my actions and it'll take some time to trust myself again. Until then I am likely to have anxiety and thats alright, I can handle it.
3)I should be moving along faster than I am.
->I should be moving at the speed I'm going. It isn't reasonable to compare myself with anybody else because nobody has all the same history, strengths, weaknesses, behaviors, believes and attitudes as me. I'm doing great the way I'm going now and I accept myself throughout my recovery process.
4)I'm not recovering, I'm still just as anxious as before.
->Part of recovery is to face limitations and anxiety. This is likely to cause more anxiety in the beginning. My progress is based on my accomplishments and not on how I feel at a given moment.
5)Calming myself isn't working when I get anxious.
->It works but in some situations it may not be as effective right now. As I continue to practice my skills, it will improve but I also need to take into account my needs. It would only be natural to have anxiety if I am trying to force myself into doing something for a long period of time and ignoring my needs to rest when i get exhausted.
6)I can't handle these feelings, its too much
->These are just feelings, I have handled them before and I can handle them again and I can take a break from whatever activity is causing them if I absolutely have to and then I can come back and do it later.
7)I should be confident enough to handle my limitations by now and enjoying many activities
->I'd like to be confident and enjoy lots of activities and to a degree i am confident and enjoy some activities. My goal here is to be more confident and enjoy things more and each day I strengthen my confidence and joy. I have to travel the journey from A to B in order to achieve this goal and there is no rush or emergency. I accept myself throughout the entire process.
Goals
Listening to affirmations;
I took a whole week off of affirmations and it was good to get back into doing them. I have done them everyday since i created them until i started the challenge to do the program again. I didn't feel too good when I was listening to some of them at the same time as facing one of my limitations. It got overwhelming. I didn't focus too much on the phrases, I mostly just let them play and let my mind wander.
Hip-hop;
Was tons of fun and at first i wasn't getting any of the steps but after awhile I got them and felt good about it.
Sleep;
Other
Walking meditation;
Did it very briefly and felt good about it but again was really difficult. I am afraid of doing it because the obsessive thoughts can come and I might not be able to handle them.
Changed my morning routine a little bit today. I woke up and did the visualizing of the goals which I normally do and then the relaxation cd but instead of going straight to my computer, I had went and made some food to eat, went and folded my laundry and started to work on transfering information from my old workout journal to a new one. It felt good to switch things around and I wasn't feeling as rushed.
Mike
Monday; (last day of the first week)
Practice opportunities
1)I was transfering my workout information from my old journal (which is in a duotang) to my new journal which is a medium sized spiral notepad. The duotang is too flimsy and will easily fall apart so it is important for me to do this. I was writing the information into the new book and I think i must have done it for at least an hour before I started to feel the anxiety and it was building fast. I was starting to feel panicky and got thoughts that this would be a never ending activity and that I would get those anxious feelings and obsessive thoughts and endure them for hours and hours on end and feel horrible about myself, guilty and extremely exhausted. It also didn't help that I tried to listen to my affirmations and write at the same time. I used the 6 steps to calm myself down. I breathed slow, I asked myself what is wrong and my answer was that I was afraid that I would be forcing myself into doing something for hours and hours again and not let myself rest. I used self-talk to tell myself that I was in control and tried to continue with the writing but my anxiety didn't lighten up.
So I decided this would be a great time to bust out the action assignments. I took out that blue rock which is my symbol to slow down my breathing, my thoughts, and my actions. It slightly helped a bit and so I decided to write out my negative thoughts and I also took out the calming pictures and focused on them for awhile. I wasn't completely better with the pictures but it did make a big impact on my anxiety level as I was trying to focus on what it would be like to be in those places that were in the pictures. I then replaced my thoughts and did breathing techniques and told myself that alright I'm going to listen to my limitations and use this situation as a practice opportunity. I was alot more calm but getting anxious about going back to doing the activity. I went back and noticed that I wasn't as panicky but I had also decided the next set of overwhelming feelings, I am going to stop the activity and just go back to it tomorrow. I think i wrote for another 5 or 10 minutes and then got overwhelmed and stopped. It was a great learning experience though on how to approach limitations and I was feeling a little less satisfied with my efforts when it came to my limitations because I have avoided them many times when going through the program.
This anxiety attack has shown me that I have been treating myself the way I was taught as a child to just ignore your needs and just do what people tell you to do. In that moment I saw myself as a child and my adult self punishing the child me and pushing him to do more and more without any kind of recognition for his accomplishments and that child crying and becoming all depressed. Like my actual situation in my past where my mother broke that trust with me (at least in this way), I had broken that trust with myself. I haven't trusted myself for a very long time and in a way I was abusing myself. I broke my trust by pushing myself too much and ignoring myself, I've broken my word when I would say I would do something important and didn't, I broke it when I would be late after telling myself I'd be on time, I broke that trust everytime I would say I would go to bed at a particular time and then that time would pass and instead of going to bed when I was tired I would go to bed when I was exhausted. There are so many other things i've done to break this trust and now the inner me is crying. I need to rebuild this trust within myself again.
Lesson 2 cd
Listened to it and what jumped out at me this time is when dr.Fisher said that its really hard to give yourself to anybody in anyway when you cannot get ahold of your own thoughts and feelings. So once we get ahold of them then how we relate changes and it'll be easier to be there for someone...that is what I got out of that. I also thought more about Carolyn talking about the puddling feeling. I think i switch between that and the outright fear.
Relaxation
Relaxation cd in the am;
I had an extremely difficult time staying focused today. I kept having obsessive thoughts about how exhausted and anxious I was feeling. The relaxation cd wasn't as effective this time around but it helped a little bit.
Negative thoughts
1)It's going to take forever to finish transfering this information over to my notepad.
->It may take time to transfer all the info but it certainly won't take forever, I didn't write down that much in my duotang. I'm in control of how much I do at once and I don't have to get it all done right now. I can take breaks, I can split it up to do a little each day as well. I'm going to listen to my limits, relax when I need to and go back to it later.
2)Whats wrong with me? Why am I getting so anxious, I'm just writing.
->Whats bothering me is that I'm afraid of pushing myself into doing the task well beyond my limit and feeling extremely panicky and stressed the whole time that I do that. Historically, I have pushed myself to do things for up to 16 hours at a time without allowing myself to relax and just tried to ignore how I felt. I am in control of my actions and it'll take some time to trust myself again. Until then I am likely to have anxiety and thats alright, I can handle it.
3)I should be moving along faster than I am.
->I should be moving at the speed I'm going. It isn't reasonable to compare myself with anybody else because nobody has all the same history, strengths, weaknesses, behaviors, believes and attitudes as me. I'm doing great the way I'm going now and I accept myself throughout my recovery process.
4)I'm not recovering, I'm still just as anxious as before.
->Part of recovery is to face limitations and anxiety. This is likely to cause more anxiety in the beginning. My progress is based on my accomplishments and not on how I feel at a given moment.
5)Calming myself isn't working when I get anxious.
->It works but in some situations it may not be as effective right now. As I continue to practice my skills, it will improve but I also need to take into account my needs. It would only be natural to have anxiety if I am trying to force myself into doing something for a long period of time and ignoring my needs to rest when i get exhausted.
6)I can't handle these feelings, its too much
->These are just feelings, I have handled them before and I can handle them again and I can take a break from whatever activity is causing them if I absolutely have to and then I can come back and do it later.
7)I should be confident enough to handle my limitations by now and enjoying many activities
->I'd like to be confident and enjoy lots of activities and to a degree i am confident and enjoy some activities. My goal here is to be more confident and enjoy things more and each day I strengthen my confidence and joy. I have to travel the journey from A to B in order to achieve this goal and there is no rush or emergency. I accept myself throughout the entire process.
Goals
Listening to affirmations;
I took a whole week off of affirmations and it was good to get back into doing them. I have done them everyday since i created them until i started the challenge to do the program again. I didn't feel too good when I was listening to some of them at the same time as facing one of my limitations. It got overwhelming. I didn't focus too much on the phrases, I mostly just let them play and let my mind wander.
Hip-hop;
Was tons of fun and at first i wasn't getting any of the steps but after awhile I got them and felt good about it.
Sleep;
Other
Walking meditation;
Did it very briefly and felt good about it but again was really difficult. I am afraid of doing it because the obsessive thoughts can come and I might not be able to handle them.
Changed my morning routine a little bit today. I woke up and did the visualizing of the goals which I normally do and then the relaxation cd but instead of going straight to my computer, I had went and made some food to eat, went and folded my laundry and started to work on transfering information from my old workout journal to a new one. It felt good to switch things around and I wasn't feeling as rushed.
Mike
Last edited by NinjaFrodo on Mon Sep 13, 2010 5:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Here is the link to the Letting Go thread which is designated for venting
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
-
NinjaFrodo
- Posts: 1263
- Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2004 3:00 am
I will recover, I am recovering, each and everyday I am more recovered. I have everything I need inside of me in order to recover and face any problem or limitation I will ever encounter. Each day I become stronger with my skills and I can access more and more of my inner resources
Alright so to wrap up this week's lesson I'd like to recap;
We are the ones who choose our thoughts, it isn't anything outside of us that gives us anxiety. We choose how to respond and we can choose to respond in a way that will calm ourselves down and prevent a panic attack or we can talk ourselves into one.
When we get anxious some of the tools we now have at our disposal;
1)6 steps in order to calm us down. ACCEPT, GIVE PERMISSION, BREATH, SELF-TALK, DISTRACT, LET TIME PASS. However you could try the 6 steps that are in my program which are all the same except the last one is to find the humor in it.
2)Time your anxiety attacks and look at a time piece during the anxious episodes until it ends.
3)Use an object or symbol to remind you to calm down
4)Look at post cards or pictures of really nice scenery
5)Imagine a wonderful image or use a mantra
6)Walking meditation where you first focus on breathing slowly and then focus on your surrounds and then back to breathing
Mike
Alright so to wrap up this week's lesson I'd like to recap;
We are the ones who choose our thoughts, it isn't anything outside of us that gives us anxiety. We choose how to respond and we can choose to respond in a way that will calm ourselves down and prevent a panic attack or we can talk ourselves into one.
When we get anxious some of the tools we now have at our disposal;
1)6 steps in order to calm us down. ACCEPT, GIVE PERMISSION, BREATH, SELF-TALK, DISTRACT, LET TIME PASS. However you could try the 6 steps that are in my program which are all the same except the last one is to find the humor in it.
2)Time your anxiety attacks and look at a time piece during the anxious episodes until it ends.
3)Use an object or symbol to remind you to calm down
4)Look at post cards or pictures of really nice scenery
5)Imagine a wonderful image or use a mantra
6)Walking meditation where you first focus on breathing slowly and then focus on your surrounds and then back to breathing
Mike
Here is the link to the Letting Go thread which is designated for venting
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
THH
About that mother's reaction, she definately has the wrong attitude, not you. I remember when I had infant twins and a 3 year old I was walking down the street one day when a neighber lady came out and asked to give my 3 year old some bananas. I accepted them but wondered if she thought I wasn't feeding him enough fruit.I remembered that just the other day when I was throwing away rotton bananas, wishing I had given them to some one before they were wasted. It took me 25 years to realize she wasn't critisizing my parenting, just trying not to waste food. Parents of young children are under so much stress.
Mike-
I get the feeling you are very dedicated to physical fitness, that's so healthy for us and something I need to be more consistant in. However, I was wondering if you might be putting too much pressure on yourself to do it perfectly? Does keeping and recopying old workout journals add to your workouts? Do you really need to do this? Maybe it would be good to let it go and just keep a currant journal-
Do we start week 3 tomorrow? Thanks again for starting this support group.
mcshope-
Wow, that's so wonderful, That's real progress, it gives me more hope for my own recovery.
I found myself crying this morning, and I asked myself what had I just been thinking? " I'm alone now, I'm a wrinkled, grey old lady and alone now. I used to be young, pretty, and have a family with me."
thought replacement- My family didn't "leave" or die, they're not "gone". Children grow up, that's a good thing.I am loved by them and I love them, and we stay in touch by phone and a few visits a year. My husband is helping one of our children with a business for awhile, that's a good thing too. He will be coming home in a few weeks. I'm powerless over the passage of time and the aging of my body. My body is healthy, and every part of it works well. I can and do take good care of myself. Today I will eat well, exercise and fix my hair amd wear a little makeup.
your right friends, its a new start on a new week, why not anticipate good things that may be coming our way
About that mother's reaction, she definately has the wrong attitude, not you. I remember when I had infant twins and a 3 year old I was walking down the street one day when a neighber lady came out and asked to give my 3 year old some bananas. I accepted them but wondered if she thought I wasn't feeding him enough fruit.I remembered that just the other day when I was throwing away rotton bananas, wishing I had given them to some one before they were wasted. It took me 25 years to realize she wasn't critisizing my parenting, just trying not to waste food. Parents of young children are under so much stress.
Mike-
I get the feeling you are very dedicated to physical fitness, that's so healthy for us and something I need to be more consistant in. However, I was wondering if you might be putting too much pressure on yourself to do it perfectly? Does keeping and recopying old workout journals add to your workouts? Do you really need to do this? Maybe it would be good to let it go and just keep a currant journal-
Do we start week 3 tomorrow? Thanks again for starting this support group.
mcshope-
Wow, that's so wonderful, That's real progress, it gives me more hope for my own recovery.
I found myself crying this morning, and I asked myself what had I just been thinking? " I'm alone now, I'm a wrinkled, grey old lady and alone now. I used to be young, pretty, and have a family with me."
thought replacement- My family didn't "leave" or die, they're not "gone". Children grow up, that's a good thing.I am loved by them and I love them, and we stay in touch by phone and a few visits a year. My husband is helping one of our children with a business for awhile, that's a good thing too. He will be coming home in a few weeks. I'm powerless over the passage of time and the aging of my body. My body is healthy, and every part of it works well. I can and do take good care of myself. Today I will eat well, exercise and fix my hair amd wear a little makeup.
your right friends, its a new start on a new week, why not anticipate good things that may be coming our way
Lindalee, Thanks for posting. I never had kids, so that was helpful in describing that whole scene. Thank you for the insight. I agree that young parents are under so much pressure. I can't imagine. But then when we were growning up our parents had their things of those days to deal with too. I know my dad grew up in the depression, so we were always reminded of how lucky we had it. Maybe we were?!
I felt so not alone in reading your post, about the crying and how you were feeling. I feel your pain. I am coming to grips with the idea that I'm in a different season in my life too. We are not young anymore, we are not really old either. Our hormones are playing into this feeling too.
I love your thought replacement. I love your caring well for yourself.
Mike, Be good to your self. I would have high anxiety pushing so hard too. Let go...let it happen, don't force it on yourself.
Just my thoughts...
See everyone in session 3!
I felt so not alone in reading your post, about the crying and how you were feeling. I feel your pain. I am coming to grips with the idea that I'm in a different season in my life too. We are not young anymore, we are not really old either. Our hormones are playing into this feeling too.
I love your thought replacement. I love your caring well for yourself.
Good Job!your right friends, its a new start on a new week, why not anticipate good things that may be coming our way
Mike, Be good to your self. I would have high anxiety pushing so hard too. Let go...let it happen, don't force it on yourself.
Give your self permission to not push your self so hard. Its the new you, who you want to be. Retrain your thoughts. Do something you like to do, take a break. The past is the past, you are a great person, fun to be around, good sense of humor. Smart & sensitive. Don't stay in the same routine of JUST doing the program. Experiance the new you.5)Calming myself isn't working when I get anxious.
->It works but in some situations it may not be as effective right now. As I continue to practice my skills, it will improve but I also need to take into account my needs. It would only be natural to have anxiety if I am trying to force myself into doing something for a long period of time and ignoring my needs to rest when i get exhausted.
Just my thoughts...
See everyone in session 3!
"I am going to recover, I am recovering, and each and everything I do brings me closer to freedom from my self-imposed limitations. I will do everything possible to recover in the healthiest way because I refuse to live a life based on false fear, anxiety, and depression.
First off, I want to apologize. I'm going to keep my post fairly short today. You all have posted some wonderful things as well as issues that deserve response but I'm feeling overwhelmed right now and seem to be running out of time to get everything done. I'd like to reply at some time but right now I'm going to have to let go. Please don't take offense; I value everyone's posts and when I have the time I would happily reply.
DEALING WITH ANXIETY AND PANIC
Sunday was a mixed bag. Overall my anxiety was reasonable and I handled most of it well. But I needed to take my motorcycle out to run the engine and keep it in good running condition. It's something I used to enjoy but now it's very anxiety provoking and seems much more like a chore. I kept stalling and putting it off for much of the day.
I finally got my rear out there and rode for about 45 minutes. I did well for the most part but had a few times where I became highly anxious and near panic. Once was while waiting in a turn-lane waiting to turn left where I was boxed in by other cars and a median barrier. I guess with a motorcycle, I could have always slipped between cars if I really needed to escape! Another time was when I rode on a very short section of freeway. I got extremely uncomfortable as I was getting up to 60 MPH and was gripping the handles so tightly. But in both cases I was able to talk myself through it and of course nothing terrible happened.
Today was an excellent day. I got my work from home done early and was able to get a little extra rest. I also was able to make it into the office and worked an additional 2 hours from there. Not only did I make it in, but I took the freeway the entire way there. That's something that I rarely do these days. I was very proud of what I had accomplished.
I also went on another bicycle ride tonight and traveled the same route that I had the panic attack last Saturday. My anxiety stayed low and I was able to focus on enjoying the ride and scenery. It was very refreshing.
POSITIVE THOUGHT REPLACEMENT
I have too much to do and not enough time. --> Often there are many things that demand our attention. I have the ability to prioritize my obligations. Not everything needs to be done at once.
I need to eat better. I'm carrying around an extra 20 pounds even though I exercise regularly and don't eat excessively. --> My diet is something that I have almost complete control of. I can choose to eat healthier foods and decrease my consumption of simple carbs.
I've missed a few days of doing the relaxation exercises. I'm never going to get into the habit of doing them regularly. --> This is something I can work on. My past does not dictate my future. Even though I may not have established a good routine for getting my relaxation exercises in yet, I can still work on it. Each day is a new day with new opportunities to change my behaviors.
FINAL THOUGHTS ON SESSION 2
One of the key elements I've relearned this week is that the first few moments of panic are critical. It is during that time I can make a tremendous change in my reactions by consciously choosing what path to take. When I start to follow my old, automatic responses, I can recognize that I'm repeating old habits and instead decide to handle my anxiety by accepting it, allowing my body and mind to work through it, and focusing on the positive outcome that I handled it and can do it again.
First off, I want to apologize. I'm going to keep my post fairly short today. You all have posted some wonderful things as well as issues that deserve response but I'm feeling overwhelmed right now and seem to be running out of time to get everything done. I'd like to reply at some time but right now I'm going to have to let go. Please don't take offense; I value everyone's posts and when I have the time I would happily reply.
DEALING WITH ANXIETY AND PANIC
Sunday was a mixed bag. Overall my anxiety was reasonable and I handled most of it well. But I needed to take my motorcycle out to run the engine and keep it in good running condition. It's something I used to enjoy but now it's very anxiety provoking and seems much more like a chore. I kept stalling and putting it off for much of the day.
I finally got my rear out there and rode for about 45 minutes. I did well for the most part but had a few times where I became highly anxious and near panic. Once was while waiting in a turn-lane waiting to turn left where I was boxed in by other cars and a median barrier. I guess with a motorcycle, I could have always slipped between cars if I really needed to escape! Another time was when I rode on a very short section of freeway. I got extremely uncomfortable as I was getting up to 60 MPH and was gripping the handles so tightly. But in both cases I was able to talk myself through it and of course nothing terrible happened.
Today was an excellent day. I got my work from home done early and was able to get a little extra rest. I also was able to make it into the office and worked an additional 2 hours from there. Not only did I make it in, but I took the freeway the entire way there. That's something that I rarely do these days. I was very proud of what I had accomplished.
I also went on another bicycle ride tonight and traveled the same route that I had the panic attack last Saturday. My anxiety stayed low and I was able to focus on enjoying the ride and scenery. It was very refreshing.
POSITIVE THOUGHT REPLACEMENT
I have too much to do and not enough time. --> Often there are many things that demand our attention. I have the ability to prioritize my obligations. Not everything needs to be done at once.
I need to eat better. I'm carrying around an extra 20 pounds even though I exercise regularly and don't eat excessively. --> My diet is something that I have almost complete control of. I can choose to eat healthier foods and decrease my consumption of simple carbs.
I've missed a few days of doing the relaxation exercises. I'm never going to get into the habit of doing them regularly. --> This is something I can work on. My past does not dictate my future. Even though I may not have established a good routine for getting my relaxation exercises in yet, I can still work on it. Each day is a new day with new opportunities to change my behaviors.
FINAL THOUGHTS ON SESSION 2
One of the key elements I've relearned this week is that the first few moments of panic are critical. It is during that time I can make a tremendous change in my reactions by consciously choosing what path to take. When I start to follow my old, automatic responses, I can recognize that I'm repeating old habits and instead decide to handle my anxiety by accepting it, allowing my body and mind to work through it, and focusing on the positive outcome that I handled it and can do it again.
"Common things occur commonly. Uncommon things don't. Therefore, when you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras." -- C.J. Peters