New Member Needs Help

[westlynne56]

Hi Racer, I too had some trouble with the threads so I just started looking at the ones that clicked mentally for me and followed up on those. You can choose the option (I think it says view your threads) and it only brings up the threads you've participated in. Maybe someone else has some advice about that?

Thanks all about the info regarding meds. I'm slowly weaning myself off the Ativan as the Anti-depressent kicks in. I'm down to taking .5mg before bedtime only and plan to reduce that amount in the next few weeks. I've been feeling more like my old "normal" self these days and think the anti-depressents are interupting the negative thoughts so that I have a bit of time to say to myself "Hey, that's garbage!" I can't wait to get off meds altogether, but, in reality, am grateful for this mental break. I've recently developed tinnitus and have been totally freaked out about it, instead of learning to manage and cope with it like thousands of people do. It's been tough, I've been overwelmed and I honestly believe I needed the meds to get me through this (along with this great program and counseling, too).

Take care, all. Off to work now.

Lynne

[scb77]

Hello to everyone. I am on week two of the program and I am still struggling. I am having a really difficult time with the relaxation CD. I feel like when I try to listen and do the breathing it makes me more anxious. It is really hard for me to count and breath in and out, I feel like I can't breath. I have been putting it off and only doing it a couple times a week. I am really trying to put all my effort into this and its really hard. Just thought I would share.

[Toni Louise]

I too am a new member. I was on Prozac for PMDD for about 10 years. I was introduced to ativan when I was going through my divorce. It was a PRN and very seldom used it. This past fall I had a complete hysterectomy and therefore did not need the prozac any longer for PMDD. SO I am weaned off that. I also have a new person in my life. He however is not a healthy person, physically or mentally. I feel as if I have made a very decision to be with him. It is draining to me to be around him. As every new relationship, it all started out with a high hopes, especially on my behalf. HE has a drinking problem that he mixes wit his numerous meds, and he is on alot. I feel as if I am trapped now. ANd I am angry, angry that he denies that his mixing his anti depressants with alcohol could not be the cause. He is in great defense to keep his alcohol. He at the moment is still in bed and remain there until he feels like getting up. And at 5 he will begin mixing the drinks usually about three stiff ones. He will hide out and smoke his cigaretts and drink alone. When he is done he will then fix himself something to eat. By then I have already gone to bed and he falls asleep in the recliner. He will eventaully come to bed at about the same time I have to get up to get ready for work. This is my life in a nutshell. I just recieved my series last week, I have already listened to 1-5. Yesterday I battled with feeling blue. I again went to bed alone, he was asleep in the chair. I feel as if I am drowning. I feel he is killing himself and I am just sitting here and watching him do it. My best freind just died alittle over a week ago. She had COPD, and congestive heart. She smoked her last cigarett and attempted to get into bed and apparently fell on her back and died beside her bed. She would not quit smoking, she tried, but when things got bad,she would pick them up and start again. So the past year I have also spent time waiting for it to happen, her to die.
I am feeling relief that it is over, finally over. Oh, my job is in Hospice. I asked him this morning if he would like to go to church with me. Nope he would rather not. And he is still in bed. I am sad today, I feel as ifI have made a mistake, I am on overload. I am with a man who is in big denial about his alcoholism and takes enough meds to choke a horse, but it vould never be the alcohol. I know I cant fix this, I can only take care of me. My anxiety is this.My way of coping with the stress was and is using food as a way to numb the stress and I am presently 100 pounds over weight. Wow I know I have got myself in a corner for sure. I am grateful for the series. I need the support for sure and I need the courage to take careof JUST ME and me only....thanks for letting me share.