Birthday Jitters

[Jenn29]

Hi all. I am new to the program (on session 2) and on the eve of my 24th birthday. During what should be the prime of my life instead I am plagued by constant anxiety and panic attacks. I have had this condition for close to 18 years now, but it has never been this bad and chronic. To be honest...I am tired. I'm tired of having to work at it just to be "normal." I realize there is no normal...but I am tired of having to work so hard just so that I am not constantly thinking of death and dying, the end of the world, all the weird physical symptoms I am having and how much it is affecting my work and relationships.

I am so ready for this program to start working and all of the other natural methods I am trying. I was on medicine once and beat my depression. Then I changed my diet and came off meds. Felt great. I hate all things modern medicine (nothing wrong with people that take them I just don't like them for myself). So in some small way if I have to get back on them I feel like I am failing. Because I know I can beat it on my own. I have never been so bad off in the way of anxiety and I am starting to lose hope.

I just hope I do not embarrass myself in front of my family members coming in for my birthday tomorrow. I know we are supposed to think it is silly that we think about what others think of us. But I don't want to ruin their time. (Again thinking about their time on MY birthday) but I can't help it! That's the way people like us are programmed I guess. It would be nice to have a relaxing fun day instead of one spent in the corner (so to speak).

May God bless all of you, my fellow friends in panic. So nice to know I am not alone at least. I wish you much success in your journey and anyone that prays, I am taking donations! Happy to reciprocate

Have a wonderful weekend!!

[ariel2477]

Happy birthday!!

I used to choke on food every time i had to eat around people in a social setting like birthdays for people where i worked.. Count your blessing for things to be thankful for. I know family situations can be difficult at times. You have someone and some family in your life that cares. I do not ....so has taken me years to get to this point and I AM getting better.