Sure this program is great, but If I rewind the clock 5 years, I had constant depersonilisation, it was very scary indeed and certainly wouldn't want to go back there but I had no limitations then. I could go anywhere I wanted.
But now while I feel fine 90% of the time I am limited as to where I can go. I am socially anxious, I also just go the 5 mile journey to work everyday and thats it. I go no where else, I don't leave my comfort zone which is about 10 mile in radius. I can leave it if I just decide to get up and go somewhere without any planning, but having a wife makes this almost impossible because by the time she is ready I have worked myself into a state and can't go anywhere. When I do leave my comfort zone i'm fine for a while then start getting depressed and just want to go home.
So going on these 2 examples its hard to know if I'm getting better or worse.
Ignorance seems to be bliss when it comes to anxiety disorder, I;ve had it all my life, even as an 8 year old I remember having panic attacks but didn't know what they where so just ignored them and life was pretty good as a child. Its when I starting investigating to find out what was wrong that it all seemed to go wrong.
It's Hard To Know If I'm Getting Better Or Worse?
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NIRELANDGUY
- Posts: 27
- Joined: Tue May 15, 2007 2:57 pm
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Guest
I am having some of the same problems. I was so excited and hopefull when I first started the program. I could see what I was doing and that it was the problem. I really looked forward to the next week and the next step. Lately though, I have been so depressed and doubtful. I feel like I have regressed to before the program. I don't feel positive and find myself focusing on all the negative again. I had a hard time with the assertive session because I had no situation in which to assert myself. Which got me thinking about how I don't have friends and don't have a social life. I am a stay-at-home mom (which I love but it can get lonely), my husband drives semi and is gone for long periods, and money is tight so I have nowhere to go. I feel so alone and secluded. Trapped. I think that is what started the depressive feelings. I also lost a very dear friend to me last week, which has been hard on me and sad. I don't know how or where to go to make more or new friends. So now I am doubting my recovery. I don't feel that sense of relief that I am in the right place and this is the program for me. I don't feel better.
I do recognize some changes still, but feel sort of stuck. Like I am not making further progress. I am on session 9 which talks about this a little. That there is no exact timeline for getting better. And that some of our fears or guilt over being happy can hold us back. It gave me a little hope, so that is what I am focusing on. I am willing and ready to plod on. I also try to remember it took me years to get like this, and it will take time to get better. Sounds like you have had this problem awhile too. We need to be patient with ourselves and compassionate. I like the quote from session 7 0r 8. "I will do me best. My best will be wonderful" or something close to that. Focus on what you do accomplish and praise and reward yourself for that. If you made it past the ten miles than GREAT! Don't focus on being out of you comfort zone, focus on the possibilities. It is an adventure. Be happy with what you did and aim for more next time. You can do it. You will be fine. We can and are getting better. I decided you can't help but get better unless you really focus on not. Good luck to you.
I do recognize some changes still, but feel sort of stuck. Like I am not making further progress. I am on session 9 which talks about this a little. That there is no exact timeline for getting better. And that some of our fears or guilt over being happy can hold us back. It gave me a little hope, so that is what I am focusing on. I am willing and ready to plod on. I also try to remember it took me years to get like this, and it will take time to get better. Sounds like you have had this problem awhile too. We need to be patient with ourselves and compassionate. I like the quote from session 7 0r 8. "I will do me best. My best will be wonderful" or something close to that. Focus on what you do accomplish and praise and reward yourself for that. If you made it past the ten miles than GREAT! Don't focus on being out of you comfort zone, focus on the possibilities. It is an adventure. Be happy with what you did and aim for more next time. You can do it. You will be fine. We can and are getting better. I decided you can't help but get better unless you really focus on not. Good luck to you.
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Guest
Hi Sam
I want you to know that I have the exact same thing happening to me. For 3 years I had constant depersonalization, but I could go anywhere pretty much. In October of 2007 it turned into a lot anxiety and panic. Ever since then I have been very limited to where I feel comfortable going. I too often question whether or not I am getting better. I wonder if things were better when I could go anywhere but had the D/P or are things better now that for the most part my primary symptoms are nervousness and panic and I am limited.
I think that your mind tries to protect you from anxiety becoming bad, hence the depersonalization, but after a while it can't anymore and it turns into full blown anxiety and panic. I look at it as a second stage. We can recover from this. It is our bodies tell us to do something about it, to take care of it.
I want you to know that I have the exact same thing happening to me. For 3 years I had constant depersonalization, but I could go anywhere pretty much. In October of 2007 it turned into a lot anxiety and panic. Ever since then I have been very limited to where I feel comfortable going. I too often question whether or not I am getting better. I wonder if things were better when I could go anywhere but had the D/P or are things better now that for the most part my primary symptoms are nervousness and panic and I am limited.
I think that your mind tries to protect you from anxiety becoming bad, hence the depersonalization, but after a while it can't anymore and it turns into full blown anxiety and panic. I look at it as a second stage. We can recover from this. It is our bodies tell us to do something about it, to take care of it.
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Guest
Yes thats exactly how I feel.. I generally feel ok most days now, still just scared to leave my comfort zone. I would really love a vacation but I'm to scared, and I would hate my kids resenting me when I'm older saying I never took them on vacations etc,Originally posted by Karilynn:
Hi Sam
I want you to know that I have the exact same thing happening to me. For 3 years I had constant depersonalization, but I could go anywhere pretty much. In October of 2007 it turned into a lot anxiety and panic. Ever since then I have been very limited to where I feel comfortable going. I too often question whether or not I am getting better. I wonder if things were better when I could go anywhere but had the D/P or are things better now that for the most part my primary symptoms are nervousness and panic and I am limited.
I think that your mind tries to protect you from anxiety becoming bad, hence the depersonalization, but after a while it can't anymore and it turns into full blown anxiety and panic. I look at it as a second stage. We can recover from this. It is our bodies tell us to do something about it, to take care of it.
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Guest
Sam
What you have to do is just get out there. Start off slow. Plan a few hours out somewhere that is maybe 30 minutes away. You need to go out there and get uncomfortable, it's the only way that you're going to realize that you can, because you can do anything. You've just got this idea in your mind that you can't. You're telling yourself "no, I can't do that" so of course you feel like you can't go anywhere! Say "I can" and get out there! You've gotta feel the fear and anxiety and do it anyway. What is the worst thing that could happen? A panic attack? Big deal. They last maybe 5-10 minutes and they don't do anything new. You can handle it. I promise.
What you have to do is just get out there. Start off slow. Plan a few hours out somewhere that is maybe 30 minutes away. You need to go out there and get uncomfortable, it's the only way that you're going to realize that you can, because you can do anything. You've just got this idea in your mind that you can't. You're telling yourself "no, I can't do that" so of course you feel like you can't go anywhere! Say "I can" and get out there! You've gotta feel the fear and anxiety and do it anyway. What is the worst thing that could happen? A panic attack? Big deal. They last maybe 5-10 minutes and they don't do anything new. You can handle it. I promise.