My life has hit a downward spiral

SpecialK · Post by **SpecialK** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 5:15 am

Hey everyone. I need some advice. My life has taken a downward spiral. I've tried to get help from counselors, but they just don't understand. I moved in with my boyfriend of 5 years into a house this summer. Things aren't going so well. He just doesn't meet my emotional needs, nor does he understand my anxiety disorder. I just recently graduated with my masters and obtained a new position in September. My school loans just came in and I have to pay more than I expected to pay. I don't make that much at my job. My health isn't that great either. I have acid reflux and it's hard to swallow sometimes. It seems like no doctors have been able to help me. I am no longer on medication for anxiety. I was on medication for 10 years and it killed my stomach. It also screwed around with my head too much. I just want to things to get better. I don't know what to do

I want to move on with my life, but the financial struggle is holding me back. If anyone has any advice please write!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 6:09 am

I am sorry to hear about your troubles. I have been there often and am there currently. I often feel my marriage does not satisfy my needs emotional, physically or otherwise. We have struggled from day one. Now, we have financial constraints that are further driving us apart. We have 2 mortgages and a business loan. We need the money tree!!! I have struggled with heart problems and stomach issues. I finally just told myself, enough is enough. Through this program, I am getting stronger. I am able to voice my needs now and not feel guilty, well less guilty. Life is short. This is not a dress rehearsal but the final act. We cannot take one moment for granted. We need to spend every waking moment achieving our goals. Figure out what matters most to you and what you cannot live with out. Discuss it with your boyfriend and if you do not envision the same future, you will know what to do. As for finances, we are all there. Times are tight. Set up a payment arrangement and just do what you can. For your illnesses, take of yourself body, mind and soul. You will feel better in time.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 6:39 am

hey special k (love the name),

first off, congrats on obtaining your masters degree and the new job!

secondly, school loans are one of the most (if not THE most) flexible loans that you can have (I know, I am working on my Masters degree right now). If you went through a bank, there are many options including deferments and forebearances(spelling?) for economic hardship.

keep in mind, this is not saying that you can't pay your loans back, only that right now it is just too tough. the interest will probably accumulate while the loan is on hold, but once your finances are once again in order you will be able to pay off those loans!

if your bank is giving you a hard time, look into consolidating with the federal governments Ford program. I have my loans through them, and they have always been more than flexible with paying back what I owe.

My wife has acid reflux, and she finds that the rx- plutonix(?) works wonders for her. we are pregnant right now, so they say she can't take it, but has been taking TUMS in the meantime.

Congrats on being off of anxiety meds, and if you stick with this program it will help you tremendously.

Question: how is your current exercise regimen?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 7:08 am

Thanks for writing me back. I currently exercise everyday, I run 5-6 days per week for 40 minutes and also lift weights on the other days. The exercise has helped but has not helped enough. I feel like I need something else to take the edge off. My boyfriend is not the most motivating person. I need someone who is emotionally there for me. I need someone to motivate me. Any ideas? I need to start making changes in my life so I enjoy life.