I think I must have been watching television when I heard someone mention a victim's mindset and soon after that I started to question if this was something I had. I did an Internet search to find out more about it and had to agree that this was something that had plagued me all of my life. Someone who has a victims mindset thinks of lots of different situations where they are being taken advantage of, being treated unfairly, on the short end of the stick, etc. This was a great thing for me to discover about myself because I could not only have a definition for my mindset, but also start to understand how to deal with it. The best way that I find to deal with having a victim's mindset is to start letting go of past feelings of being victimized however far back it goes. I felt like I had been victimized in so many ways; not having my father around, feeling neglected by my mom and siblings, not having true friends, not trusting girls, being poorly treated at work, struggling with bills, and on. I feel like I am in a position to address all of these subject and more in ways I had not all of my life, by addressing the validity, and recognizing that these things are not a current part of my life, but the past. I feel so much relief by letting go of my pain toward all of these things physically, mentally and spiritually free. I would invite everyone who reads this to ask themselves if they have a victims mindset and then address it. There are so many thoughts in my mind I am constantly countering these thoughts, but the more I do it the better I feel.
Paridygmn
Discovering my victim mindset
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Paisleegreen
- Posts: 1778
- Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:27 pm
Thanks for posting your thoughts on this. I didn't grow up feeling that I was a victim nor did my parents ever voice themselves or talk as if they were victims. I noticed it more after I got married and my in laws seemed to be more negative.
It took a lot of praying and studying and as well as hard work to overcome feelings of despair after different negative events or "trials" in life were more abundant after becoming a newlywed. It truly was a trying experience, which I have and continually am overcoming the disappointments and hard times I experienced raising a family and interacting with the world in all its negativity.
I had to grow up...I was no longer sheltered by my more positive family of origin and the temperate weather of the state I grew up in. I also was not a college student whose only daily concerns was homework, dating, and getting along with my roommates. That was a piece of cake after entering marriage and motherhood and all the responsibilities that come with that.
I'm glad that I got married and had the children I have and now some grandchildren. I just experienced "life" and now I'm experiencing the next "stage of life". I only can hope that I will survive and do as well as I have in overcoming hurdles and obstacles in my past in the days ahead.
...was it just yesterday that I happily made mud pies in my backyard until the day turned into night?
:p Paislee
It took a lot of praying and studying and as well as hard work to overcome feelings of despair after different negative events or "trials" in life were more abundant after becoming a newlywed. It truly was a trying experience, which I have and continually am overcoming the disappointments and hard times I experienced raising a family and interacting with the world in all its negativity.
I had to grow up...I was no longer sheltered by my more positive family of origin and the temperate weather of the state I grew up in. I also was not a college student whose only daily concerns was homework, dating, and getting along with my roommates. That was a piece of cake after entering marriage and motherhood and all the responsibilities that come with that.
I'm glad that I got married and had the children I have and now some grandchildren. I just experienced "life" and now I'm experiencing the next "stage of life". I only can hope that I will survive and do as well as I have in overcoming hurdles and obstacles in my past in the days ahead.
...was it just yesterday that I happily made mud pies in my backyard until the day turned into night?
:p Paislee