New relationship

Soldier Of Panic · Post by **Soldier Of Panic** » Sat Nov 13, 2010 3:32 pm

I just started dating a new girl and i really. Like her now im having panic attacks about it because i actually found someone i like any advice? Last major relationship when i felt like this about someone was back in 2004 and it ended bad and im worried about getting hurt again

*slimjim · Post by *slimjim » Sat Nov 13, 2010 6:06 pm

Hey Soldier. Join the club. I've not been in a serious relationship since my divorce from my wife over 28 years ago. So I'm going to a threapist at the clinic I belong to and I'm going to hopefully verbize all my fears of starting another relationship even though I don't think I'm going to still really commit myself to someone else. But we'll see maybe I'll get to the heart of my phobia with the opposite sex and get some where with one. You know I've got one major rule which is NO KISSING OR ANY THING ELSE AT THE START! I'm sure you can understand that chemisty has a way of clouding ones judgment of what real and what's not. So my advice is take things real slow and easy. Find things that you have in common and enjoy the time and conversation and stay way from the lower parts of a relationship. Don't fall for THE TENDER TRAP!

Paisleegreen · Post by **Paisleegreen** » Mon Nov 15, 2010 4:38 am

I hope all goes well for with this girl. I agree with SlimJim. Keep your actions honorable, so that your feelings don't get confused.

SoWhatif · Post by **SoWhatif** » Mon Nov 15, 2010 5:05 am

First off thank you for your service SOP.

Take your time,as in moving to a new unit we get very nervous. Being yourself is most important. Don't be to easy to catch for her or any female, it takes all the fun out of the chase.

P&P · Post by **P&P** » Tue Nov 16, 2010 1:55 am

I felt this way when I started dating my boyfriend. I was very scared of getting hurt but then one thing led to another and I found myself falling for him. We did break up at one point and it made me realize that it really wasn't in my control. You can do your best to be a good partner but sometimes we can't control the possibility of being hurt. I know it's hard to let go, but start small and you'll get there.

Soldier Of Panic · Post by **Soldier Of Panic** » Sun Nov 28, 2010 10:11 am

I feel like im running out of time (although im really not) im only 30 but its been since i was 26 that i had a actual Girlfriend. Ive dated but i havnt found someone i like in a long time and when i do i try and find everything wrong with the person and why it wont work on purpose i guess to scare myself and cause my own panic attacks. We went out to a nice lunch yesterday and i almost lost it (i kept it cool and maintained) but for a brief minute i felt like i was going to get out of control. I have 99% beat the panic attacks its been almost 10 years BUT when it comes to relationships and only relationships i feel like im starting at day 1