First time to Grocery store, struggled.

John61 · Post by **John61** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:30 am

My wife is sick and I'm embaraced to say I went to the grocery store for the first time by myself in our 18 year marriage. I haven't had an attack for a while but I had one today. I was able to keep it from escalating by using the steps and some EFT but I'm a little discouraged. I feel very shaken right now and am feeling like I have ruined all of the progress I made.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:35 am

John - That was the FIRST time you've ever gone to the grocery store!!! Instead of looking at this as a failure - look at it as an accomplishment! Good for you that you went! Of course something new like that is going to be scary...and anxiety-producing, but you did it! Give yourself a break! Don't beat yourself up over this - it's a good thing that you did something new!!!

You are posting on session 2, but you registered last year...have you completed the program? If so - just go back and review the panic attack session...and remember your breathing. Don't be discouraged! Be proud of this accomplishment!

It's OK that you feel a little shaken...it comes with the territory!

Just float through this and remember that those thoughts that produced the anxiety - are just thoughts...they can't hurt you.

YOU DID IT! Good for you!

Blessings,
Dawn

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:45 am

John - That was the FIRST time you've ever gone to the grocery store!!! Instead of looking at this as a failure - look at it as an accomplishment! Good for you that you went! Of course something new like that is going to be scary...and anxiety-producing, but you did it! Give yourself a break! Don't beat yourself up over this - it's a good thing that you did something new!!!

I echo what Prv31Mom has said. You did it, focus on that, not what you perceive as failure. You went to the store for your wife, first time by yourself. Holy moly, pat yourself on the back man!! You don't lose the progress you make. Trust me, I had "self attacks" after making significant progress. They stopped me only for a couple of hours at a time. At times I would wake up with a "self attack". But after they were over, THEY WERE OVER. You used self-talk to help you through. Great!!! You're saying it was effective. It doesn't stop working. Keep truckin'. You did great, John. Congrats!!!

Carolyn Dickman · Post by **Carolyn Dickman** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:46 am

Thanks Dawn,

I've been to the Grogery store with my wife but never by myself doing the whole order. It was intense, I don't have a fear of going to stores but that was something new for me. I felt like a fish out of water. It really caught me off guard to have the panic, I wasn't ready for it but I did keep it from getting bad.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 3:01 pm

John61,
I agree you should be praising yourself. I go to Walmart a couple of times a week and kick myself for it. Too long lines and too many people- with a kid or two in tow at that.
If these are the things bothering you, and if I could give some advice, I'd suggest trying to go shopping early in the morning because the stores get hectic around lunch. I'd also try to find a smaller, less active store. We have a Save Right about 45 minutes away that I'd rather shop at. Hope some of that helps!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 4:35 pm

What an accomplishment. You should be very proud. I remember last year going to the grocery store by myself for the first time in a year. That was hard. And I did have panic attacks for about the first 10 times. But I got better and better. The best way to face these things is practice. Go at slow times. And always take a list. That helps.

Angla · Post by **Angla** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:46 pm

good job baby, its better to have done it, so you can learn from it.... Pick out the things that you were talking yourself into during your trip to the grocery store or during the time you were shopping. write it down and find a comforting positive thought to replace it with. The next time u are in the position of shopping alone again...I want you to focus on the replacement thought. It works.

god bless you.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 1:04 am

I really didn't expect this to cause any panic. I wasn't going there with antisapatory anxiety. I had been feeling anxious all morning and the store just pushed me over the edge. The attacks are one thing but I get that spacey feeling and smaller attacks for a few days after. Is this normal?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 1:29 am

John -

There is no "normal" per se, but what you described has been experienced by a lot of us!

You did it, though! Just keep remembering that. Sure you had an anxiety episode, but you were at the store by yourself for the first time...and you made it through! This is a red-letter day for you in my estimation!

Like Don was saying - sometimes these things happen when you are making progress in your recovery. Don't give up - float through it.

You did great! If you don't believe yourself saying that...then BELIEVE US! YOU DID GREAT!

Dawn

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon May 05, 2008 5:57 am

CONGRATULATIONS JOHN

It's OK to feel anxiety, you have conquered something new, and it feels kind of strange, but in time it will feel natural. Good for you! Very proud of you. Pat yourself on the back!!!! I agree with the other posts, you deserve to feel proud!!!! Take care, and keep up the program.

The journey of a thousand miles, begins with one step!!!!!