What things bring you up?

NinjaFrodo · Post by **NinjaFrodo** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 2:55 am

There is soooooooo much negativity on this website, we really need alot more positive things because we all want to get better right? So what i want to know is what makes you more happy, more motivated, more loved and loving? What gives you peace and comfort?

I suggest putting as much detail into it as you can as lists are ok but do they really make you feel good? Live the feelings, Live the memories of those good things. If you feel good after doing this then you know that you're doing it right

Mike

NinjaFrodo · Post by **NinjaFrodo** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 3:03 am

Getting myself to sleep before 11 makes me feel amazing the next day as my anxiety has decreased and I have alot more energy.

Getting things accomplished makes me feel happy because I'm making a good use out of the day and I'm also working towards some goals.

Using guided meditations bring the stress way down as It takes me away from the focus of myself and the stressful events in my life.

Making Yummy food and eatting it makes me feel really great because I'm a guy for one and guys are happy from good food and for 2 I feel good because I put effort into something and I get to judge the results right away.

Seeing where a negative thought has come from and accepting that I have it makes me feel better because it reassures me that this is normal to react this way and it allows me to overcome it easier.

Acknowledging accomplishments because it builds my self-esteem and confidence and it makes me want to go after more goals

and the last one for right now, Exercise. This makes me feel better because of those lovely endorphins going through my body, I get a great sense of accomplishment and I know that it works directly on my health.

Mike

Can't_be_beat · Post by **Can't_be_beat** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 3:23 am

Good Post. I was on the chat site for a couple of years and i found that too often my anxiety would increase because it seemed a lot of folks just wanted to complain instead of searching for answers and victory. I know anxiety is difficult...been there, done that...am there, doing that.

Anyway, things that bring me up...

1. Positive stories and feedback from people

2. Reaching out to help people

3. having positive conversations with ANYONE I run into, no matter how I feel

4. Not feeling like doing something BUT doing it anyway and realizing it wasn't bad at all

5. Looking at your picture, is that a mohawk? I love it! It's very fun.

The list could go on but in general the things that lift me up are positive people and being a loving person to others.

NinjaFrodo · Post by **NinjaFrodo** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:05 am

Well what is it about these things that bring you up? and why do you think they bring you up?

Oh and you definately got a chuckle out of me for that last one. It is a faux hawk. It's great because If i need to look more professional i just leave the hair down and it looks normal but I can make it look funky and put it into the hawk when i want as well

I agree with the chat thing as well. I've even tried going in there to give people hope and try bringing people up. It seems like whenever i'd try involving people in something I know would help out alot or just telling people about some really inspiring things...they don't respond at all. I'm also feeling similar to the forums too. I seen a negative thread that had over 2000 views but then i looked at some of mine and they were like 236 or something. I'm actually starting to question if it is worth it but I believe there are people on here who genuinely want to overcome their conditions and are greatful for the help and so i'm still here and you know it isn't so much about the words that you type in these threads but the energy you put behind them that makes the diffrence.

You know what, I'm glad that you had mentioned about the chat thing. As i'm typing this i just realized why i feel a little negative about posting. I've been focused on the people who are just here to complain and not on the ones who want to grow. Now I know my focus and i'm going to choose who i respond to more carefully.

Mike

monty'smom · Post by **monty'smom** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:13 am

My List,

Doing this program..has to be my first because through it I have learned to feel better about myself, that I'm not alone and I will love life for the first time in many years, I'm motivated most days, I'm off meds, I will only improve and that's exciting, lots more to feel good about!

Quitting smoking..I'm down to 10-11 a day from 25 - 30..big accomplishment for me.

Sitting by my fireplace with my fur babies, I get so much from loving them.

Watching it snow, natures way of making winter so pretty.

Doing my best to help someone feel better.

Making something special for dinner that my husband loves, I didn't enjoy cooking when I was so depressed and now most days I do..again.

Reading posts of accomplishments others have made is very uplifting as I'm happy for them and it all adds hope for me if it's something I'm still working on overcoming.

OMG, I think I could write more but will leave it at this for now.

DMP720 · Post by **DMP720** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:37 am

Whats brings me comfort and peace

My dogs, I have a golden retriever and a teddy bear and they are the greatest things God has blessed me with. They stay with my mom but whenever I come over they are ALWAYS happy to see me and always come to lick up the tears when I cry. They are amazing!!!

Decorating for Christmas. I love the season, and the holiday, its so joyful!

The new belief I have in myself. Knowing that I AM going to be ok. No matter how annoying a symptom is, I know that in time it will pass.

Finishing a hard day of work. I dont know why.. but I LOVE to work hard. Everything that comes my way I work it to the greatest..(sometimes thats not in my favor--aka anxiety lol) So when a hard day at the icecream shop is over...I feel FANTASTIC!!

Bodybuilding...Yes I am getting back into it. The feeling I get when I trained hard and see the results..is great!!! I love it!!!ENDORPHINS!!!!!

Watching ELF..I LOVE this movie!! I swear I could watch it over and over. My younger sister and I watched it 6 times last year lol...I already have seen it twice this year.

I know I have more...haha

monty'smom · Post by **monty'smom** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:37 am

Originally posted by Gale D:
It seems to me that those who are projecting negativity in their posts are in desperate need of support of others here on this forum. They are reaching out to others in search of someone who cares and might offer a few encouraging words. Isn't that one of the functions of this site, to help others and in the process, help ourselves?

Yes Gale,
I feel personally it is a very important part of the site and the program and it helps me both in reading and in replying and has from the beginning. Lucinda actually asks that we visit our peer group each day and this forum was made available for all to use as it was seen as a vital part of the program. As most of you know I am on here a lot and get so much from it.

Best Wishes To All!!

NinjaFrodo · Post by **NinjaFrodo** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 6:24 am

Gale D

I understand exactly what you are saying, I was in their boat as well and we can still support them. The problem is that when we "directly" give them the words they are looking for, it may help them for a very very short period of time and sometimes they use it as an excuse to not have to try. Keep in mind the lesson about secondary gains. Some people stay in this condition because they get the attention that we give them and instead of getting themselves out of it and overcoming that fear that they might not get that same attention afterwards, they stay stuck and use it as an excuse.

We still care and we will still encourage them when they make accomplishments and support them when they work on their limitations. Many of these people on a subconscious level do not believe that they even deserve this kind of help and they have to do it on their own in order to overcome it. I'm sure you can understand this as well, how many times have you seen someone be told what they can do in order to improve their lives and it still didn't really click? (I'm not saying this is a bad thing, some people just aren't ready to accept the words).

The function of the site is definately to help others and ourselves but you have to be wise on where to spend your energy and you must understand that even if the focus is on the ones who are truely ready to change, it is still open for people who are getting to that point. This is why many people can view the posts without having to respond. This is alright too.

I'm not going to post directly on a thread if i feel that the other person isn't willing to take action on their own part. I am not intrested on taking away other people's anxiety and doing all the work.

I'm not going to post on a thread if it doesn't feel right to me and I feel bad or hopeless. This doesn't make me feel any better and it just brings people lower.

I'm not going to post for the sake of my own ego either. I'm not intrested in putting myself above other people. This further brings people down.

I may post on a thread even if i do not feel that it will benefit the person who started it but only if i feel that it will benefit someone else.

The cold hard truth is that you cannot take people's anxiety away, you cannot force them into taking action and you cannot save everybody. The best you can do is give them the tools and support them when they make accomplishments or put effort into it.

Many of these people know what they have to do but they excuse their way through it for many reasons. I do not blame them because anxiety and depression can be very very painful and things can become soooooo difficult and everyday can bring suffering. I really feel for these people and I wish everyone to become better and I send good energy to everyone but I'm going to work on the ones who will spread this wish in order to make it stronger.

Mike

NinjaFrodo · Post by **NinjaFrodo** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 6:28 am

That sounds great DMP720. I take it the other job you were in didn't work out so well. That's alright, you did an awesome job with the efforts you put forth to overcome your limitations.

It is also great that you have this belief system and your exercise routine! There is no doubt that you'll do wonders in this program and in life!

Mike

NinjaFrodo · Post by **NinjaFrodo** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 6:30 am

monty'smom

That was a very great post you made there. I can tell you put your heart into it and congrats on the smoking accomplishment. I know from personal experience that this can be a huge struggle to overcome and you're doing an awesome job.

Mike