Nervous about wedding tomorrow

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jadee
Posts: 36
Joined: Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:48 am

Post by jadee » Fri Jul 18, 2008 7:46 am

Tomorrow it is my friends wedding, and although I know I have no reason to be nervous, I have that stomach turning feeling. I am just really nervous about sitting in the church for however long it takes for them to be married, and I really dont want to have to get up and leave. Sometimes when I have panic attacks I feel really faint and I worry that this will happen in front all the guests. I have already missed the bridal shower and bachelorette party, so I feel more pressure to be at their wedding so I can show them support. I guess I just need somee positive feedback from you guys to put my mind (and stomach) at ease.
When I am anxious it is because I am living in the future. When I am depressed it is because I am living in the past. ~Author Unknown

Confused and Distressed
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 26, 2007 11:23 am

Post by Confused and Distressed » Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:34 am

I have been in your shoes before, Jadee. The thought of being in a church cooped up for the ceremony is enough to make any of us uncomfortable. These are some of the things I tell myself in these situations.

1. I'm obsessing about embarrassing myself in front of others. This is a bad habit and I'm not going to freak out or do anything to embarrass myself during the ceremony.

2. Would I be feeling this way if I weren't going to a wedding tomorrow? For example, if I were going to garden, ride my bike or go for a walk, would I feel these feelings? No, so it is just the anticipatory anxiety kicking in. I know what this is.

3. I'm not alone. I will not be the only one in the church who has anxiety/panicky feelings. There are others around me who are worrying about the exact same things I am right now. I'm not abnormal.

4. Good for me that I'm here to support my friend during this important time in her life. She will really appreciate me being here.

5. What if I have to get up and leave? So what? People are going to be watching the bride and groom. Who am I to think that all the attention would be directed to me if I would have to get up and leave.

Finally, I promise you..you will make it through just fine. All these anxious feelings..they are only anticipatory anxiety and excitement. Float through them.

Good luck! I have my 10 year class reunion this weekend and am having anticipatory anxiety as well. I just tell myself I'm really excited! :)

farmchick
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jun 15, 2007 11:03 am

Post by farmchick » Fri Jul 18, 2008 9:13 am

Jadee just tell yourself its excitement. I am excited to be able to attend my friends wedding and I will have a fabalous time. I will enjoy sitting in church for the beautiful ceremony. Distract yourself with the flowers, the dresses, the beautiful bride and the decor of the Church. the same thing when you get to the reception-enjoy the moment and you'll surprise yourself asnd have a great time. let us know how you did. Take care and God bless.

bjjcr26
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 9:30 pm

Post by bjjcr26 » Fri Jul 18, 2008 9:17 am

Improudofwhoimbecoming go and have a great time at your reunion. Enjoy the moment. Be proud of who you are -anxiety and all. You are a special person. Take care and God Bless.

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:59 am

Hi Jadee!
I've been where you are and have missed far too many exciting life events because of it; HOWEVER, there is NOTHING I can do about it now, just like there is nothing you can do about the shower and party. For me the worst part has always been getting ready for the event, once there I usually have a really good time.

improud... gave you some really great suggestions- especially giving yourself permission to quietly leave the service if necessary. If you sit in the back on an outside aisle, no one will notice (or care).

I also completly agree with bna about living in the moment and focusing on the details to distract yourself.

Hope this helps and you have a wonderful time!
fischee

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Jul 20, 2008 5:54 am

Well I went to the wedding yesterdayy and I couldnt have had a better time :) The ceremony at the church was beautiful, and I felt so happy for my friends who were getting married. The reception was also amazing, it was nicely decorated and had a beautiful ambiance. As the night progressed I forgot I even had anxiety issues! I met another girl who suffers from social anxiety and depression, and we were able to chat, so its true I wasnt alone in my situation. Closer to the end of the evening, can you guess who caught the bouquet? Thatss right it was me, and I had to slow dance with the guy who caught the garter. That was a little awkward because I had no idea who he was, but we were able to introduce ourselves to eachother while we were dancing to "Going to the Chapel" Lol... all in all it was a great night! Thank you guys for your suggestions on how to keep cool, it really helped!

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Jul 20, 2008 7:29 am

CONGRATULATIONS JADEE!!! U should be very proud of yourself! I'm glad u had a great time. God bless

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Jul 20, 2008 8:51 am

Good for you, Jadee!!!
Tuck this memory away for the next time you feel anxious about socializing.

fischee

Oh, and congrats on finding a new friend, catching the bouquet, and managing to dance with a complete stranger (is he cute? *giggle and blush*)!

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Jul 20, 2008 12:51 pm

Im so glad you had a good time! Thats wonderful! Kudos to you!

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