—I kid you not, and in a recent job interview with a famous shipping company’s hiring managers and their concern if I submitted my resume on the company website when I am right in front of them with the resume. 
It absolutely sends me into orbit that my current company puts its numbers and stats ahead of its employees’ bodily functions. Other people just accept it and it doesn’t bother them. For me it’s degrading and callous and eats at me like a tape worm. This is the main reason (though there are a couple of more) for my looking for a new job. The company also has a “if you don’t like it, you can leave” attitude.
The interview with the famous company also boggles my mind because I am thinking, “Are you interested in getting the right candidates or how you get the candidates?” This is a prime example of how when another person/company’s view differ with mine I get ticked off. I am result—oriented. It’s like if I was going to drive from New York to Florida to visit my relatives I don’t care how I get there as along I get there safe and timely. The hiring managers gave me their cards only for me to email them the receipt I got after applying online. A week and a half later I got an email from their recruiter that they weren’t interested.
I feel like I have insanity at work, I am trying to escape it, and enter into more insanity, albeit a different type of insanity.
My reactions to situations which are contrary to my view/opinion/etc are shock, outrage, anger, upset, frustration, stress, mild depression and mild anxiety. A new reaction occurred today: very, very mild dizziness. My wife today removed wall decorations while I was at the supermarket. I wasn’t happy about this because she didn’t discuss it with me. But I was no where near “off the charts” like in the job scenarios. I expressed my displeasure with her very calmly and the issue was let go. (I will put back the decorations.) Being that I have been going through all this job distress for the past several months and now she plucked a nerve, I got the very, very mild dizziness. I lay down and rested. The dizziness left in about a half hour and I soon realized I needed help in dealing with my reactions to upsetting situations. I also need help in my thinking about these scenarios. I realize when a situation occurs that is contrary to my beliefs the resulting upset, frustration, etc occurs.
I joked with my friend who dealt with pure obsession OCD and said maybe I have non obsession OCD—getting upset when things are not as I think they should be. (Kind of like an more emotional Monk.)
If you go through this, please share with me how you deal with it and also any books or sites that would be helpful.
Thanks so much.
