Hi,
My anxiety has been increasing and I had a panic attack today during an oil change. I dropped my son off at school and stopped to get an oil change/transmission flush. It ended up taking an hour and 45 mins, I couldn't stand the panic anymore (after feverishly going to the front to the back of the van, tapping my feet,ect trying to get rid of the adrenaline). I got out and asked the guy how much longer. He said about 10 more mins. I had a chiropractor appt in 20 mins and it was 20 mins away. So I knew I'd have to cancel. I told the guy that I was having a panic attack and he said his wife gets that too. Then I said (and I can't believe I did!), "so if I come crying to you, can you help me?" I never cry during attacks, I felt dizzy and like I was going to pass out. He asked if I needed to walk around outside. I did and felt better. Then the second I got back into the van, I felt trapped and anxious. I fear dying alone without my husband and kids.
I also get weird thoughts like, "cars are abnormal to travel in, a large hunk of metal traveling 60 miles an hour is so unnatural." Of course a plane is 100 times worse. At this point, I feel like I've wasted $1100 on our plane tickets, I don't think I can go, let alone sit for a 4 hour interview. Just 2 weeks ago I was doing really well. What gives?
When I have a severe attack, I try to do the breathing and calm myself down, but I can't lately. I feel like I have no control whatsoever and I want so much to be over this forever (after having it for 12 years with a few years of being 'normal). I feel defeated and foolish and even now I feel somewhat anxious like I'm on the verge of an attack.
I try to calm myself by saying it's just anxiety, you aren't going to die, just relax...but even if I do calm down, another wave washes over me and I'm back to square one!
Thanks,
Ocean
What do you tell yourself during an attack?
Hi!
I can totally relate to your "anxiety episodes". I think many of us can! I get those same sensations..racing heart, dizziness, feelings that I just want to get out! But great job at sticking through an 1 1/2 hour oil change! Almost anyone in your situation would have been fidgetty (sp?) don't beat yourself up so much. Accept the feelings..say to yourself, "Something must be bothering me..I'm sure I'm just panicky because I don't want to be sitting here in an unfamiliar place without an option to just get up and leave." "I'm sure I'm anxious because I know I have an appointment with my Chiropractor in 20 minutes and I don't want to be a 'no show'."
I imagine all of this was going through your head either on a concious or subconcious level. All the while, you were releasing that nasty little adrenaline which made your body symptoms heighten. Once you started to feel the body symptoms, you heightened your intensity level by worrying that you were going to have a panic attack and not be able to leave the auto shop.
1) You are not alone. Look how many people around you have those same sensations? More than you think..the repairman's wife for example! So many people feel the same thing as us..we are just blessed to know what it is and how to handle it.
2) Be kind to yourself when you have these. Don't curse that you have these, rather accept them. Tell yourself, hey, somethings bothering me. I may not know what that is at the moment but I won't let these feelings scare me..they always go away.
3) The thoughts you were having about the car being a strange object. Everyone gets these "out of reality" thoughts every once in awhile. They are normal and won't hurt you. They go away right away so next time you get them, laugh and say, it will go away soon, it won't hurt me.
Good luck to you! I'm getting nerved up about this weekend as I'm going to a wedding with my boyfriend. The social anxiety of being cooped up in a church with all those people is anxiety enough, let alone this is the first time I get to meet his ex-wife (who is also in the wedding). AHHH!! I know I will have sensations but I also know they never hurt me. They are uncomfortable but I know they go away. I give them no power.
I can totally relate to your "anxiety episodes". I think many of us can! I get those same sensations..racing heart, dizziness, feelings that I just want to get out! But great job at sticking through an 1 1/2 hour oil change! Almost anyone in your situation would have been fidgetty (sp?) don't beat yourself up so much. Accept the feelings..say to yourself, "Something must be bothering me..I'm sure I'm just panicky because I don't want to be sitting here in an unfamiliar place without an option to just get up and leave." "I'm sure I'm anxious because I know I have an appointment with my Chiropractor in 20 minutes and I don't want to be a 'no show'."
I imagine all of this was going through your head either on a concious or subconcious level. All the while, you were releasing that nasty little adrenaline which made your body symptoms heighten. Once you started to feel the body symptoms, you heightened your intensity level by worrying that you were going to have a panic attack and not be able to leave the auto shop.
1) You are not alone. Look how many people around you have those same sensations? More than you think..the repairman's wife for example! So many people feel the same thing as us..we are just blessed to know what it is and how to handle it.
2) Be kind to yourself when you have these. Don't curse that you have these, rather accept them. Tell yourself, hey, somethings bothering me. I may not know what that is at the moment but I won't let these feelings scare me..they always go away.
3) The thoughts you were having about the car being a strange object. Everyone gets these "out of reality" thoughts every once in awhile. They are normal and won't hurt you. They go away right away so next time you get them, laugh and say, it will go away soon, it won't hurt me.
Good luck to you! I'm getting nerved up about this weekend as I'm going to a wedding with my boyfriend. The social anxiety of being cooped up in a church with all those people is anxiety enough, let alone this is the first time I get to meet his ex-wife (who is also in the wedding). AHHH!! I know I will have sensations but I also know they never hurt me. They are uncomfortable but I know they go away. I give them no power.
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Guest
I forgot to mention something..I always wondered..do you think we get anxiety episodes when we are bored with nothing else to occupy our time? I think so because if I'm not busy doing something, my mind begins to race and the body symptoms start. Sitting for 1 1/2 hours in an auto shop would sure give you time to really start internalizing..
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Guest
Hi,
Thanks so much for your words. I understand what you are saying about sitting and having nothing to do. I tried listening to the anxiety tapes, but it was too late and just made me focus more on the anxiety. The oil change guy was trying to sell me another service too and the whole time he was talking, I was experiencing the waves of panic (this was before I told him I had anxiety). It WAS comforting that his wife had anxiety because I then felt that he was more 'safe', you know? I realized as I was sitting there that I should have brought a book to read while I was waiting. I was anticipating it prior too, thinking that I had hoped it wouldn't take too long, the guy said that my van had a huge transmission, so I think that is what took so long, it had to be emptied and then new stuff put in.
Good luck to you for your wedding! That is definitely anxiety producing and meeting the ex for the first time. Good for you for going! Weddings are so cheerful, but I know hard with anxiety. I sang at my sister's wedding and was the matron of honor and I had terrible panic attacks and of course I forgot the first line of the song...only adding to the anxiety and that was almost 5 years ago!
Fortunately, the chiropractor is my uncle, so I got home and called and apologized and they were able to give me a second appt later today.
Thanks so much and take care!
Ocean
Thanks so much for your words. I understand what you are saying about sitting and having nothing to do. I tried listening to the anxiety tapes, but it was too late and just made me focus more on the anxiety. The oil change guy was trying to sell me another service too and the whole time he was talking, I was experiencing the waves of panic (this was before I told him I had anxiety). It WAS comforting that his wife had anxiety because I then felt that he was more 'safe', you know? I realized as I was sitting there that I should have brought a book to read while I was waiting. I was anticipating it prior too, thinking that I had hoped it wouldn't take too long, the guy said that my van had a huge transmission, so I think that is what took so long, it had to be emptied and then new stuff put in.
Good luck to you for your wedding! That is definitely anxiety producing and meeting the ex for the first time. Good for you for going! Weddings are so cheerful, but I know hard with anxiety. I sang at my sister's wedding and was the matron of honor and I had terrible panic attacks and of course I forgot the first line of the song...only adding to the anxiety and that was almost 5 years ago!
Fortunately, the chiropractor is my uncle, so I got home and called and apologized and they were able to give me a second appt later today.
Thanks so much and take care!
Ocean
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Guest
Ocean,
After twelve years of dealing with an anxiety disorder, you have probably experienced all the different symptoms it can throw at you. Its probably safe to say you have also been in almost(aside from avoidances) every kind of situation when a panic attack hit, or some kind of intense anxiety episode. Have you ever almost died from anxiety? have you ever flipped out and went crazy from anxiety problems? Has the anxiety been so intense one day and just kind of so,so the next, or tottally not there? I have dealt with anxiety problems as you have and thought that I would never live through some days. My turning point was when I started to recognize that all these symptoms kept reappearing, and in different situations too. How many times did have to go through an attack or have a bad day and react to the same symptoms every time, over and over! When I new damn well that I experienced the same crap nearly every day before and I didnt flip out and I didnt die and None of my anxiety fears ever hurt me other than how I reacted to it in my own mind. This was the turning point to stopping the maddness. I still have days that really suck but they're better than my best days back then. I just keep remembering, This is physiological imbalance in my body, I have a hyper sensitve nervous system that turns on my fight or flight. This always goes away, always. Ride it out! It takes practice, but it first takes that suttle shift in attention, where you start to observe yourself and observe the symptoms, and then intervene right there, take the left road or the right road. Wish you the best.
After twelve years of dealing with an anxiety disorder, you have probably experienced all the different symptoms it can throw at you. Its probably safe to say you have also been in almost(aside from avoidances) every kind of situation when a panic attack hit, or some kind of intense anxiety episode. Have you ever almost died from anxiety? have you ever flipped out and went crazy from anxiety problems? Has the anxiety been so intense one day and just kind of so,so the next, or tottally not there? I have dealt with anxiety problems as you have and thought that I would never live through some days. My turning point was when I started to recognize that all these symptoms kept reappearing, and in different situations too. How many times did have to go through an attack or have a bad day and react to the same symptoms every time, over and over! When I new damn well that I experienced the same crap nearly every day before and I didnt flip out and I didnt die and None of my anxiety fears ever hurt me other than how I reacted to it in my own mind. This was the turning point to stopping the maddness. I still have days that really suck but they're better than my best days back then. I just keep remembering, This is physiological imbalance in my body, I have a hyper sensitve nervous system that turns on my fight or flight. This always goes away, always. Ride it out! It takes practice, but it first takes that suttle shift in attention, where you start to observe yourself and observe the symptoms, and then intervene right there, take the left road or the right road. Wish you the best.
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Guest
Ocean,
I will say this: At least you did get the oil change & tranny flush. You stayed there nearly 2 hours- good for you! I know it must've been hard but you also did verbalize your problem to the manager. Isn't a small world- his wife also gets them. two guys i worked with had wives who had this problem and little did they know that I was a sufferer.
I know what you mean about those weird thoughts. I get them too sometimes. But think about what a vehicle is and does: It is a transportation device designed to operate as safely as possible. That's all it is. I'm sure covered wagons seemed unnatural at one time to people.
In a couple of hours I get to go sit through a job interview myself- probably 2 hours. I've been anticipating it for a couple days now but really, I don't care if I feel anxious about it at this point. I don't care if I feel anxiety once I get there. It is actually excitement because it is a job I'd like to have and I don't have to feel perfect.
Don't try to relax, practice letting go. Accept the feelings as they come and keep thinking calm thoughts & breathe slowly. Distract yourself in some way. It is a practice we have to enact daily to retrain ourselves.
I will say this: At least you did get the oil change & tranny flush. You stayed there nearly 2 hours- good for you! I know it must've been hard but you also did verbalize your problem to the manager. Isn't a small world- his wife also gets them. two guys i worked with had wives who had this problem and little did they know that I was a sufferer.
I know what you mean about those weird thoughts. I get them too sometimes. But think about what a vehicle is and does: It is a transportation device designed to operate as safely as possible. That's all it is. I'm sure covered wagons seemed unnatural at one time to people.
In a couple of hours I get to go sit through a job interview myself- probably 2 hours. I've been anticipating it for a couple days now but really, I don't care if I feel anxious about it at this point. I don't care if I feel anxiety once I get there. It is actually excitement because it is a job I'd like to have and I don't have to feel perfect.
Don't try to relax, practice letting go. Accept the feelings as they come and keep thinking calm thoughts & breathe slowly. Distract yourself in some way. It is a practice we have to enact daily to retrain ourselves.
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Guest
Sierra and Sparkus,
Thank you so much for your encouragement. I realize that I am still fighting this instead of letting go. I still tell myself that I am not going to be anxious and I will sit there and act normally, ect... of course, that causes the anxiety to increase! I re-read my original post and it should say that it took an hour and AFTER 45 mins in to the oil change is when I told the guy I needed to get out. Instead it looks like it took 1 hour and 45 mins, in reality it was an hour. But still much longer than I thought! It was a Valvoline and I thought it would be like 20 mins tops (I thought they could do the oil and tranny flush at the same time, but I really have no accurate perception on these things!
I do need to tell myself that I am just hypersensitive and when I'm home and with family, I'm fine. Just when I'm out in the world, I'm afraid. You are right though, I DID get through it and I DID NOT die and nothing like that EVER happens. I'm healthy and not quite 30 and it would be rare to impossible for someone like me to have a heart attack. I just wish the darn symptoms weren't so uncomfortable, you know?!
Well, I'd better make lunch, I've been loosing weight again lately due to this increase in anxiety and that makes my mom nag at me which only increases the anxiety and makes me worry about my health.
I'm going to try your suggestions as I am leaving in the next hour and a half for my appointment and it's a 30 mile drive roundtrip.
take care,
Ocean
Thank you so much for your encouragement. I realize that I am still fighting this instead of letting go. I still tell myself that I am not going to be anxious and I will sit there and act normally, ect... of course, that causes the anxiety to increase! I re-read my original post and it should say that it took an hour and AFTER 45 mins in to the oil change is when I told the guy I needed to get out. Instead it looks like it took 1 hour and 45 mins, in reality it was an hour. But still much longer than I thought! It was a Valvoline and I thought it would be like 20 mins tops (I thought they could do the oil and tranny flush at the same time, but I really have no accurate perception on these things!
I do need to tell myself that I am just hypersensitive and when I'm home and with family, I'm fine. Just when I'm out in the world, I'm afraid. You are right though, I DID get through it and I DID NOT die and nothing like that EVER happens. I'm healthy and not quite 30 and it would be rare to impossible for someone like me to have a heart attack. I just wish the darn symptoms weren't so uncomfortable, you know?!
Well, I'd better make lunch, I've been loosing weight again lately due to this increase in anxiety and that makes my mom nag at me which only increases the anxiety and makes me worry about my health.
I'm going to try your suggestions as I am leaving in the next hour and a half for my appointment and it's a 30 mile drive roundtrip.
take care,
Ocean
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Guest
To Ocean/Sierra,
Ocean, I have had panic attacks (symptoms just like yours, almost exactly) for almost 3 yrs now. Your initial post vividly reminds me of situations (every day) where I would be going somewhere alone and it would strike. I rarely have any when others are around - so I rationalize that I am afraid of being alone. I haven't reached a creshendo as Sierra points out even though I continue to tell myself that I am fine, keep breathing (etc). But I do hope my tipping pt will soon arrive because my feelings of glum, out-of-sync and not myself have been numerous lately. I have been taking effexor xr for severa yrs - reducing my dosage months ago; only recently increasing to 150 to curb the panic attacks so I can work and be productive at home. Like both of you - I want very much to manage this better and eventually get off medicine entirely.
I wish you both the best and please post any additional feedback you may have
All the best,
(dm18265)
Ocean, I have had panic attacks (symptoms just like yours, almost exactly) for almost 3 yrs now. Your initial post vividly reminds me of situations (every day) where I would be going somewhere alone and it would strike. I rarely have any when others are around - so I rationalize that I am afraid of being alone. I haven't reached a creshendo as Sierra points out even though I continue to tell myself that I am fine, keep breathing (etc). But I do hope my tipping pt will soon arrive because my feelings of glum, out-of-sync and not myself have been numerous lately. I have been taking effexor xr for severa yrs - reducing my dosage months ago; only recently increasing to 150 to curb the panic attacks so I can work and be productive at home. Like both of you - I want very much to manage this better and eventually get off medicine entirely.
I wish you both the best and please post any additional feedback you may have
All the best,
(dm18265)
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Guest
I tell myself that I will be ok, that it will pass, and that--no matter what happens--it will not be the end of the world.
It is very tough. I try to envision myself in a situation that I would consider very relaxing--a warm bath, a cozy hammock, whatever--and sometimes even that calms me down a bit.
It is very tough. I try to envision myself in a situation that I would consider very relaxing--a warm bath, a cozy hammock, whatever--and sometimes even that calms me down a bit.
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Guest
Hi! I used to have panic attacks on a daily basis. I never could pinpoint when they would occur or what set them off. I especially had them a lot right before I went to sleep. Once, I woke up in the middle of the night with one (that was absolutely the worse!), and I even woke up from anesthesia after having gall bladder surgery having a panic attack! I began by learning to recognize the symptoms I had that indicated I was heading towards a panic attack. This was usually tingling in my arms and legs and a feeling of fear in my chest. When I recognize that I am feeling these symptoms, I tell myself: "I am experiencing some panic. I am not going to have a panic attack!" Somehow, by telling myself a few times that I am not going to let myself have a panic attack, I am able to ward it off. This has been especially helpful. Good luck!
Genie
Genie