Realizing about friendships/social anxiety

[Iwillbebetter]

Thanks keep smilin, ahhh busy busy... We are down to less than a week til we move, and I have a church event tonight. Every month the women get together on the 3rd Tuesday from like 6:30-8 for a class type thing and socializing. I am now on the "comittee" to plan them, so I will be going to that tonight, and have to make strawberry shortcake for it also... But I have been doing pretty well with it. I have been taking advantage of the chances I get to get things done around the house, have actually gotten A LOT done. Didn't even realize until last night, my boyfriend was asking what he could do to help, and most things he suggested, I had already done. I am doing my best not to let the stress get to me, although I did lose it a little over the weekend, but it's all about the ups and downs right. I was able to realize, and am back to myself now! I did also sit and talk with my 11 year old Saturday morning (when I started feeling it) and let him know I did A LOT of work Friday (my little ones were with a friend from church for the day) and was tired and exhasted. Let him know I may be a little crabby/sensative, but assured him it has NOTHING to do with him!!

And I agree with you and Lynda there, a variety of friends is a GREAT way to go. I think a variety of friends is perfect as there are so many different parts to us, there is no one group of friends to go with that. (Might have made more sense in my head lol)

[keepsmilin]

Aw good. You were assertive in telling your 11 year old that you may be grumpy but it has nothing to do with him. Good for you
Good luck with everything!!

I am going to a movie tonight with two friends and I am sooo excited. Not at all anxious. I have been up since 6am...working out...singing...phone calling...e-mailing...doing the program...cooking...etc...and I am getting loooads done. This is a PRO but can also be a CON, for I usually overwork myself every week. I am learning balance..but some days just feel so good if you keep them busy! Other days...lessen the work out and rest. I am very happy to be able to get my stuff done and then socialize tonight as my treat!

[LyndaLu]

I am going to a movie tonight with two friends and I am sooo excited.

Hope you had fun on your "night out". I used to love going to the movies with my
co-worker friends from my old job. There was a certain group of us that celebrated
each one of our birthdays with a lunch and a movie together. That was pretty special
and I really enjoyed that. The whole group would do gifts, a lunch, and a movie.
Now-a-days it is really hard to get a whole group
of gals together at one time with everyones busy lives . . . . but everyone always
showed up for our birthday lunches. Getting the gifts wasn't too bad either, ha ha.

Lynda

[Iwillbebetter]

Keepsmilin - I know what you mean, there is always so much that could be done, it is not hard to go overboard. I do have times that I just seem to have more energy and am able to do more, I don't fight that, but when I'm ready to stop I stop, no more pushing to do more. I am learning to be more ok with the days I don't do as much! I am glad you are able to reward yourself with getting out to a movie with friends. And not anxieties about it that's AWESOME!! Hope you had a good time

[keepsmilin]

Thank you both for the replies and support. I really enjoyed myself last night!

On being so busy..... I have lots to do today, but I will try not to push too hard. Everything will get done in good time.
Usually...when I reach the point that I am too tired to continue...I will still continue and push...but I am learning to stop. The goal is to stop before I reach that point. It'll take practise.

Iwillbebetter, you're right about going with the energy...if you have more...go with it...if you're tired...slow down or stop.

Lynda, the B-day lunches sound so lovely! You're right..it's hard to collect a bunch of ppl together in one day nowa days! When it happens...it's fantastic!


Stay strong!! We're all doing good things for self improvement! I am so proud of all of us!

[LyndaLu]

dear iwillbebetter:
I think I might just start looking for a church to attend each Sunday in my neighborhood.
I sure need something to get me out of my apartment and out into the real world. The church
would have to be close-by; don't want to use a far-a-way location as an excuse not to go.
Well, it is just a thought. I need to get my life movin' along.
Lynda

[LyndaLu]

dear keepsmilin:
Thanks so much for your support.
Better days are ahead.
Lynda

[keepsmilin]

Church would be a good reason to get out of the house. Good for you. And you're welcome

[Iwillbebetter]

I agree, church would be a great idea to get you out of the house. You may also find a new friend or two while going. And just the feeling alone that you may feel while going is so worth it!! I've got to imagine there are a few that would be close. Now a days there seems to be churchs everywhere!!

[LyndaLu]

I have been going to church now for the past four Sundays.

The church I have been attending is close to where I live and so it is quite a convenient location.

I don't have to stress about a commute to church, it is an easy process to get ready to go.

The church is a nice sized church, not too big and impersonal. The people I have met have

all been nice to me. I have met the pastor and his wife and the other pastor as well.

I have been attending a bible class with three ladies and a man from the church.

After the church service and the bible class we go out to eat brunch at a small restaurant nearby.

It is good for me to get out and about and to be around people. I am getting used to this very slowly.

I have not been around people on a regular basis since I lost my job 3 years ago, I have become so

agoraphobic. I am going to continue attending this church and I will try not to have those overly

excessive high expectations that people like us tend to have ! I will just go with the flow and

each time I attend I will treat it as a new and interesting experience.

Lynda