Is calmness boring?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jun 11, 2008 11:41 am

I don't really have a lot of friends. I have one very good friend, to the point we consider ourselves sisters, and her mom introduces me to people as her other daughter. This friend suffers from clinical depression. She is on meds for it. She doesn't like leaving her house (though she does when needed). As a result, she has a hard time holding a job(other health issues contribute), and she often has barely enough money for food. She can be a very negative person. Some of her negativity comes from her (proven many times over) psychic ability to know when something very bad is going to happen somewhere, or to know when someone close to her or someone she knows is going to die soon. She will feel these events weeks before they occur. Her biggest depression comes from the fact that while she will feel these things, she isn't able to tune in to who or what specifically and that bothers her. She senses all the badness in people when she goes out, so she stays in as much as possible. My point here is, I would never want to lose her as a friend. She looks to me for positive energy and the only one she has ever been able to talk to. My hope is that as I go through this program, I'll be able to help her more. Even if just by example. (I've made her copies of the workbooks and CDs but I don't know if she's bothered to try them yet). I don't want to grow away from her, but with her. And I don't want to lose the fun I have all by myself either. I have a VERY vivid imagination, that I know doesn't help my anxiety, but I still don't want to lose as I have a lot of fun with it too. I hope I don't get boring. That's one thing I've never been.

Luli · Post by **Luli** » Thu Jun 12, 2008 11:00 am

I have gone through this thinking myself. Just over a year ago I quit drinking and was amazed by how most of my old "friends" drifted away.

At first I was concerned thinking that maybe I had become boring or not very interesting, however, I started doing some different activities and noticed that I was making some new friends.

Now after about a year I feel better than ever because when I look at it from a different perspective I realize that some of the people that I thought were "friends", were really just "good time Charlies". A couple of the people that I have met in this time are proving to be excellent friends and I don't have to get half licked to enjoy their company.

As far as calmness being boring......I don't really think that this is the case....for example just take a look at a flower starting to bloom or some other nature scene and just realize how beautiful some things in life really are.

The person who said to take some time to smell the roses really knew what they were talking about. Is this boring ?...If so....I like boring.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Jun 12, 2008 11:31 am

Thank you all for all the wonderful thoughts you share on this topic. I was wondering the exact same myself

.. .and as hard as some times it gets, I'm choosing peace --of mind as well-- over anything else.

Peace and happy journeys!
Ivonne

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Jun 12, 2008 2:18 pm

Thanks everyone for the comments. I see we all voted for calmness and peace.
Tallboy- your comments made me see how similar it actually is to stopping drinking and changing who you spend time with. Interesting. I guess if my old friends think I am now boring I have no choice but to make new calmer, more peaceful friends. A possible blessing in disguise!