Jan 5th, 2009
I finally finished my last schedualled shifts at the restaurant and I feel sooooo relieved now. I was resenting having to work both that job and the call centre at the same time. I was so bitter because I didn't get a single day off. I really don't like feeling so crusty but now I'm free!!!
Another day at the call centre job...I don't particularly like Mondays and Today was no exception...I didn't feel like getting out of bed at all, I didn't get to do a few of the things I wanted to do before leaving for work and then I got to work and found out we had to do cold calling!!! Yay!!! I really don't feel comfortable cold calling...It's a great learning opportunity for me but I just don't feel ready about it yet...if only I was less anxious.
A friend of mine had suggested that I write about 3 things a day that I'm greatful for and that on its own I don't feel completely comfortable doing, I don't know why but, I feel what I need to do right now is look at what I do have if I start thinking negatively...thinking about things I don't have and characteristics I lack.
Ok so Ya I may not like Mondays and that's ok because it is the beginning of the work week and I'm still working through my anxiety so It is only normal to feel this way but I only work in the morning now and then I have the evening to do whatever I want.
I didn't feel like getting out of bed at all because I get all groggy in the morning but it doesn't last the whole day and I'm really happy that I have a job that gives me enough to afford a life.
I didn't get to do alot of the things that I wanted to do in the morning but, I did get to do some of the most important things.
I found out we had to do cold calling and I really hate cold calling and it isn't suprising as It forces me to face my anxiety head on and it feels really uncomfortable for me but I got to talk to some really good people and I grew and pushed through my wall of limitations even if it was just a little bit and This'll help me become who I want to be even quicker.
I had a hard time with working on my anxiety because I was so focused on the diet aspect...I found the lemonade diet I did which helped flush out my system had got me to a state that nothing else did so it seemed like it was the only way I could get over the anxiety...The truth is that it isn't and in fact there was a time where I felt even better than I did on the lemonade diet and during that time I was soooo bored I went to bed alot earlier for a few weeks, I didn't really have to do anything stressful and I had just ended a very stressful job so I was feeling really relieved....I was eatting somewhat Ok but it was about relieving stress not about my diet. The main problem is that I'm not able to cope with the stress so ultimately it's reducing the stress that's going to help me over come this.
Mike
NinjaFrodo's Everything Journal
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NinjaFrodo
- Posts: 1263
- Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2004 3:00 am
Here is the link to the Letting Go thread which is designated for venting
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
http://forum.stresscenter.com/viewtopic ... 52&t=25087
You can follow me on Twitter, same username or check out my blog
http://ninjafrodo.blogspot.com/
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Guest
Thanks for sharing. It's really yucky here in Georgia this morning(cloudy&raining). I felt like just going back to bed after I took my girls to school but i didn't. I did my neg. to pos. writing. It helped alot! I kept telling myself I'm so tired, I'm so sleepy. But then I was like No I'm not doing this. I got out my notebook and started writing every neg. thought that would come. I couldn't think of anything pos. at the time to replace it. So I decided to do some problem solving. That helped alot too!
I know what my Problem is today. I'm giving myself credit for at least knowing what's causing most of the depressed feelings.
I just wanted to tell you that your post helped. It helped me to know That I'm not the only one that wakes up and has a bad morning. I wanted to tell you too... that I still would like to try the journaling thing on here but I guess I feel like I don't know how to go about it. You may not remember me....I don't know?... but I posted on a topic about journals...
Take-care
I know what my Problem is today. I'm giving myself credit for at least knowing what's causing most of the depressed feelings.
I just wanted to tell you that your post helped. It helped me to know That I'm not the only one that wakes up and has a bad morning. I wanted to tell you too... that I still would like to try the journaling thing on here but I guess I feel like I don't know how to go about it. You may not remember me....I don't know?... but I posted on a topic about journals...
Take-care
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Guest
No, I do remember you saying you wanted to do the journaling...Let me give you some advise...write about something that you have passionate feelings about...what i mean passionate I mean somehting that was very strong. This can be either Negative or Positive as long as it has meaning for you...Maybe some Eureka Moments where things just click. What is it you're focusing on in that day? What's going on in your life?
Why plan what you write in a journal at the beginning? Is it really that important? Try asking questions to yourself to figure out what to write if you get stuck.
Mike
Why plan what you write in a journal at the beginning? Is it really that important? Try asking questions to yourself to figure out what to write if you get stuck.
Mike
Yo NF, You're a busy dude. Restaurant job over now? Call Centre job speaking to you? Except for cold calling. You probably can reframe your thoughts about cold calling. Realize many books have been written about this most frightening sales presentation: The Cold Call. It's not unheard of to have no enthusiasm for it, but reframing it somehow could make it more of a challenge. Some steel in the constitution doesn't hurt either. Good Luck.
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Guest
reframing it? Oh you mean building some kind of foundation in the form of cold calling skills?
You know it is really funny as I really wanted to know more about how to do it accurately but not once did I think that maybe there were books about this. This is an awesome idea, thank you very much again for the 2nd time. I think a trip to the Library would be a great idea.
Mike
You know it is really funny as I really wanted to know more about how to do it accurately but not once did I think that maybe there were books about this. This is an awesome idea, thank you very much again for the 2nd time. I think a trip to the Library would be a great idea.
Mike
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Vegasmomof4
- Posts: 31
- Joined: Sat Aug 07, 2004 3:00 am
Jan 7th 2009
So Today was a very intresting day. I had bought a necklace for a friend of mine because I was just inspired to do it. I don't know why and I didn't expect anything out of it, I just knew i needed to do it. I did it and she was really excited and it made me feel good too. One of her dreams is to be a well known singer and have grammys and the necklace is like a big O so I told her to let it represent her first platnum record.
Work wise the first 4 hours were horrible and I wasn't getting any recrutes and other people were getting a few it just made me feel like the pressure was on. I felt really stressed and felt like i'd be fired if I didn't start getting people. I just kept hearing that the phone was disconnected or not in service or that it was the wrong number. However I feel that there was a very important lesson in this...I needed to learn how to say no to people and to feel alright to not have to give people their own way. If i'm worrying about having to give people their way all the time it will continue to be very easy to manipulate me and how is that suppose to help my self esteem?
Another work related issue...I was brought into the office again and again I was afraid that I was going to be fired. That wasn't the case this time just as it wasn't last time either. They suggested that I get off track alot on the phone which makes it too long and leaves me less time to get more people into the groups...I realized shortly after that I had overlooked something in the screener which was very significant...Most people I was talking to over the phone were complaining that the screener was taking too long and that was because I was listing off every brand of cereal that we had on the list. We weren't suppose to do that, we were just suppose to ask these people which brands they ate and let them answering instead of giving them the options on the paper. I also realized that I didn't need to go and tell my supervisors that I realized this...in fact it might get me in more trouble.
I did end up getting more people later on and my luck changed. I think i needed to realize those last 2 things i mentioned before my luck changed.
I've focused my Wayne Dyer meditation on Health lately and it's almost as if i'm putting life into a dead rotting corpse...or at least it used to be a rotting corpse but now it's coming back to life. The passion is growing in this wish and I feel more excited about becoming healthier. I will become healthier.
I also felt inspired to work on breathing whenever I started to feel uncomfortable. No expectations on it relieving my anxiety, no expectations on it relieving depression or anything...I just did it when I was feeling bad and it did help...alot more than when I was expecting actually now that I think of it...maybe i'll do it again tomorrow.
Mike
So Today was a very intresting day. I had bought a necklace for a friend of mine because I was just inspired to do it. I don't know why and I didn't expect anything out of it, I just knew i needed to do it. I did it and she was really excited and it made me feel good too
. One of her dreams is to be a well known singer and have grammys and the necklace is like a big O so I told her to let it represent her first platnum record.Work wise the first 4 hours were horrible and I wasn't getting any recrutes and other people were getting a few it just made me feel like the pressure was on. I felt really stressed and felt like i'd be fired if I didn't start getting people. I just kept hearing that the phone was disconnected or not in service or that it was the wrong number. However I feel that there was a very important lesson in this...I needed to learn how to say no to people and to feel alright to not have to give people their own way. If i'm worrying about having to give people their way all the time it will continue to be very easy to manipulate me and how is that suppose to help my self esteem?
Another work related issue...I was brought into the office again and again I was afraid that I was going to be fired. That wasn't the case this time just as it wasn't last time either. They suggested that I get off track alot on the phone which makes it too long and leaves me less time to get more people into the groups...I realized shortly after that I had overlooked something in the screener which was very significant...Most people I was talking to over the phone were complaining that the screener was taking too long and that was because I was listing off every brand of cereal that we had on the list. We weren't suppose to do that, we were just suppose to ask these people which brands they ate and let them answering instead of giving them the options on the paper. I also realized that I didn't need to go and tell my supervisors that I realized this...in fact it might get me in more trouble.
I did end up getting more people later on and my luck changed. I think i needed to realize those last 2 things i mentioned before my luck changed.
I've focused my Wayne Dyer meditation on Health lately and it's almost as if i'm putting life into a dead rotting corpse...or at least it used to be a rotting corpse but now it's coming back to life. The passion is growing in this wish and I feel more excited about becoming healthier. I will become healthier.
I also felt inspired to work on breathing whenever I started to feel uncomfortable. No expectations on it relieving my anxiety, no expectations on it relieving depression or anything...I just did it when I was feeling bad and it did help...alot more than when I was expecting actually now that I think of it...maybe i'll do it again tomorrow.
Mike
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Mary Wargo
- Posts: 274
- Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2008 12:37 pm
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Belinda333
- Posts: 15
- Joined: Tue Jun 26, 2007 6:05 pm
Jan 8th 2009
Intresting day today, normally I do the wayne dyer chant type meditation and then just a normal guided meditation one after the other...I decided to split them up today and do the normal meditation right when i woke up before even getting out of bed...and then the other one after I did a few things like put together lunch and I ended up feeling more relaxed about it. I also decided to bring a few elements from the relaxation cd from the program which was the breathing technique and the muscle tension and relaxation into the normal guided meditation. It seems to do the same thing that following the relaxation cd on it's own would do. I'm glad because I need variety in my life.
I decided to walk to work today, I miss walking so much and haven't done it as much since i work really early in the morning. I left a bit late but that was alright and I walked part of the way there and took the subway the rest of the way and I felt pretty good that I at least did some walking even if it wasn't all the way.
Another intresting thing I noticed is when I was at work today I was already pretty passionate about getting those recrutes that I needed today and the intresting thing was that I got exactly the ammount they were looking for...6. They were alot easier for me to get today which is a big change from yestaurday morning's bad luck. It makes me think....Is luck really luck or is it the response of the universe to the passion/karma of the person.
I had a great practice opportunity today with one person...The guy's wife was on our database and I guess we haven't called her in awhile. I asked for her and he said well who the hell are you. I thought to myself well that was kinda rude but whatever and then I told him I was Mike from consumer vision and I guess he thought I was a telemarketer or something and was complaining about something and didn't even listen to what I had to say and historically, I would feel that I needed to defend myself and I just believed that however they respond was the right way to respond. That old guy was acting like a 4 year old and frankily that's his own problem.
I'm noticing more and more that a typical response of mine when someone is frustrated or impatient is, I would give myself anxiety to push me to meet their expectations and stress out just to please them. I felt I had to justify everything that the people I work for do and have me do and mroe and more I'm realizing that this is not my responsibility. I am not responsible for how someone else is thinking or feeling...I cannot make them think a certain way and I'm not provoking a certain response. If they're going to be frustrated then frankly that is their own issues and I doubt it even has 30% to do with me so I don't have to put so much stress on me for this...it's not a bad thing, it's just stupid on my part and thats just the path my life has taken me on.
I'm continuing to do the breathing thing whenever I feel uncomfortable and I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'm not really focusing so much on good or bad or expectations. I'm just inspired to do it that's all.
Speaking on inspiration, I'm actually reading a book by Wayne Dyer called Inspiration and it is such a powerful book for me. It has shown me things that throughout my life I've experienced and nobody has ever talked to me about, ever. One of the biggest things I've gotten from the book so far is that in our spirit form or the formlessness good and bad don't exsist. So when people are mean and nasty well it really isn't based on anything real. Our core selves are like the One (whomever you believe to be the higher power).
Ok as I know there may be younger people who visit this site i'm going to be a little careful with my wording in this next part. I'm feeling bad as I believe one of the symptoms of anxiety and depression for me is that my drive for special adult time is little to nil. I think about it and I desire it but when the time comes when I do have it, I get virtually nothing out of it. There is the occasional time but most of the time it is just boring or I get anxiety because I'm not getting anything out of it. It is extremely frustrating for me but it is also another motivator to get me to a healthy state where my life isn't controled by anxiety and depression anymroe.
Mike
Intresting day today, normally I do the wayne dyer chant type meditation and then just a normal guided meditation one after the other...I decided to split them up today and do the normal meditation right when i woke up before even getting out of bed...and then the other one after I did a few things like put together lunch and I ended up feeling more relaxed about it. I also decided to bring a few elements from the relaxation cd from the program which was the breathing technique and the muscle tension and relaxation into the normal guided meditation. It seems to do the same thing that following the relaxation cd on it's own would do. I'm glad because I need variety in my life.
I decided to walk to work today, I miss walking so much and haven't done it as much since i work really early in the morning. I left a bit late but that was alright and I walked part of the way there and took the subway the rest of the way and I felt pretty good that I at least did some walking even if it wasn't all the way.
Another intresting thing I noticed is when I was at work today I was already pretty passionate about getting those recrutes that I needed today and the intresting thing was that I got exactly the ammount they were looking for...6. They were alot easier for me to get today which is a big change from yestaurday morning's bad luck. It makes me think....Is luck really luck or is it the response of the universe to the passion/karma of the person.
I had a great practice opportunity today with one person...The guy's wife was on our database and I guess we haven't called her in awhile. I asked for her and he said well who the hell are you. I thought to myself well that was kinda rude but whatever and then I told him I was Mike from consumer vision and I guess he thought I was a telemarketer or something and was complaining about something and didn't even listen to what I had to say and historically, I would feel that I needed to defend myself and I just believed that however they respond was the right way to respond. That old guy was acting like a 4 year old and frankily that's his own problem.
I'm noticing more and more that a typical response of mine when someone is frustrated or impatient is, I would give myself anxiety to push me to meet their expectations and stress out just to please them. I felt I had to justify everything that the people I work for do and have me do and mroe and more I'm realizing that this is not my responsibility. I am not responsible for how someone else is thinking or feeling...I cannot make them think a certain way and I'm not provoking a certain response. If they're going to be frustrated then frankly that is their own issues and I doubt it even has 30% to do with me so I don't have to put so much stress on me for this...it's not a bad thing, it's just stupid on my part and thats just the path my life has taken me on.
I'm continuing to do the breathing thing whenever I feel uncomfortable and I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'm not really focusing so much on good or bad or expectations. I'm just inspired to do it that's all.
Speaking on inspiration, I'm actually reading a book by Wayne Dyer called Inspiration and it is such a powerful book for me. It has shown me things that throughout my life I've experienced and nobody has ever talked to me about, ever. One of the biggest things I've gotten from the book so far is that in our spirit form or the formlessness good and bad don't exsist. So when people are mean and nasty well it really isn't based on anything real. Our core selves are like the One (whomever you believe to be the higher power).
Ok as I know there may be younger people who visit this site i'm going to be a little careful with my wording in this next part. I'm feeling bad as I believe one of the symptoms of anxiety and depression for me is that my drive for special adult time is little to nil. I think about it and I desire it but when the time comes when I do have it, I get virtually nothing out of it. There is the occasional time but most of the time it is just boring or I get anxiety because I'm not getting anything out of it. It is extremely frustrating for me but it is also another motivator to get me to a healthy state where my life isn't controled by anxiety and depression anymroe.
Mike
Last edited by NinjaFrodo on Thu Jan 08, 2009 5:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.