I was doing well in session 3, but can't see the positive in this situation, hopefully you can help, its like in the tape when they talk about a woman driving to the doctors and made a wrong turn and beat herself up, she couldn't see the positive, well neither can I in this situation.
This morning at work I was having my breakfast, there are 4 of us who work in our department, In arrived the boss with breakfast bought from a café in town, Our workshop is situated in a very rural location so something like this is a treat and rarely happens, I commented sarcastically
"It was nice to be asked if I wanted something"
the boss replied
"If I had of asked you would you of taken something"
"I may well of"
and got no reply, I later found out the boss paid for the other guys breakfasts, so there I was sitting like a tool, while the other guys commented on how great there breakfast was,
This isn't the first time this has happened, I got left out of Christmas dinner before aswell, its the point of the thing.
But all day I have been filled with negative thoughts and am really angry.
This all sounds very very petty doesn't it? but still, it has wound me up the wrong way all day, the feeling of rejection, I get a lift with the boss every morning and an hour previous he was bad mouthing everyone.
Need help seeing the positive in a negative situation
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Guest
I kind of know what you mean.
When I was really badly agoraphobic and my anxiety was a lot worse, my friends would always invite me out to do things and I would decline. As I began to get better and felt like I could and wanted to go out and do these things my friends just kind of stopped asking because they got use to me declining. I found this out because when I would ask what they were up to on a particular weekend they would tell me the plans and Id say " why wasn't I old about it?" and I would get " well you always say no when we do that so we assumed you wouldn't go "
Now if they asked me to go I probably would have gone. But I would get upset even when I couldn't go because I felt like I at least deserved to know about the plans given that they are my friends.
Assertiveness and just expressing how I felt about being "slighted" went a long way into changing things.
Maybe your situation is absolutely nothing like mine, but when I obsess enough about something that it is consuming my thoughts I know it is time to decide about whether I am going to speak up and resolve it, or simply let it go.
When I was really badly agoraphobic and my anxiety was a lot worse, my friends would always invite me out to do things and I would decline. As I began to get better and felt like I could and wanted to go out and do these things my friends just kind of stopped asking because they got use to me declining. I found this out because when I would ask what they were up to on a particular weekend they would tell me the plans and Id say " why wasn't I old about it?" and I would get " well you always say no when we do that so we assumed you wouldn't go "
Now if they asked me to go I probably would have gone. But I would get upset even when I couldn't go because I felt like I at least deserved to know about the plans given that they are my friends.
Assertiveness and just expressing how I felt about being "slighted" went a long way into changing things.
Maybe your situation is absolutely nothing like mine, but when I obsess enough about something that it is consuming my thoughts I know it is time to decide about whether I am going to speak up and resolve it, or simply let it go.
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Guest
Thanks for that, I think its just time to let go, I've been rattling over it all day annoying myself.Originally posted by EddyJ:
I kind of know what you mean.
When I was really badly agoraphobic and my anxiety was a lot worse, my friends would always invite me out to do things and I would decline. As I began to get better and felt like I could and wanted to go out and do these things my friends just kind of stopped asking because they got use to me declining. I found this out because when I would ask what they were up to on a particular weekend they would tell me the plans and Id say " why wasn't I old about it?" and I would get " well you always say no when we do that so we assumed you wouldn't go "
Now if they asked me to go I probably would have gone. But I would get upset even when I couldn't go because I felt like I at least deserved to know about the plans given that they are my friends.
Assertiveness and just expressing how I felt about being "slighted" went a long way into changing things.
Maybe your situation is absolutely nothing like mine, but when I obsess enough about something that it is consuming my thoughts I know it is time to decide about whether I am going to speak up and resolve it, or simply let it go.