I can't believe I did it

bna · Post by **bna** » Sun Jun 08, 2008 12:30 pm

On Thurs early a.m. I received a call that no one ever wants to receive. My husband called to say that he had been in MVA on the way to work. He said he was fine but was going to the ER to be checked out. Initially, I felt the rush of outright fear but had to pull it together because I had 3 kids to get off to school. One of which was in the room with me when I got the call.

I was able to breath and focus on the thought he's ok that I had spoke with him. A few minutes later, I received a call from the local police that my husband had been in a accident. The police officer said that both my husband and the other driver were very lucky to be alive given that both vechiles were compltely totaled and that my husbands truck had rolled over. The other driver had crossed the lane divide and my hsuband had swerved to avoid a direct head on collison. They still collided but not completely head on.

I was beginning to feel the overwhelming sense of terror. I thought I was going to fall down.But I told myself i needed to focus on my breathing and that he was ok. I spoke with him and he said he was ok. I kept repeating that to myself over and over.

I got the kids off to school and raced to the ER. I kept telling myself over and over that thank God he's ok, and that I can do this. I was so frightned of what I would find when i got there. I kept praying Dear Lord give me the strength to cope.

I am so happy to report that he had only a few cuts/brusies and Thank God the young man who hit him was also ok, he wasn;t even wearing a seat belt.

Even in the ER, I kept focusing on the fact he was ok. I would not allow myself to negatively what if. I kept telling myself God was good and my husband and the other driver were alive.

It had taken a while for my husband to be discharged. It turns out, there had been MVA victim from another accident who was the same age as my husband who did not survive his accident. Then it hit me, I started to cry. I thanked the nurse and left with my husband. I was barely able to talk. I started to cry but not hysterically as I would have had in the past. It was amazing.

When we got to the car,I sat there a few mintues and cried and then told myself it was time to pull it together.

I went with my husband to tow yard because he had to retrive his belongings out of his vechile. I told myself I could and would do this. I was able to go there and remove his wallet ,licese and personal belongings without losing it. Instead of focusing on the wreckage, the what ifs and that the fact that the truck had been totaled. I focused on the how well built the vechile had been. How blessed and lucky we were to have a vechile that withstood an impact and roll over. I silently thanked the vechile for what it did to save my husband's life.

I know this is a long post but I am simply amazed at how i dealth with this situation. In the past, I have been the one who always fell apart when there was an emergency. the one who couldn't cope because my anxiety and panic attacks were so severe.

I have refuse to let my mind dwell on the what if scenarios. When I find myself having a moment I just thank God for His goodness. That my husband and that the other driver are both ok.

I thank God for many things especially that my husband and other driver are ok but also for this program. I know if I had not gone through this program, with my coach Toni, there is absolutely no way I could have handled this situation and come through it feeling fortunate and blessed. In the past I would have been immobilized in sheer terror/panic/negativity and being completely overwhelmed with scary obessive thinking.

So thank you for listening. I know there are some new members out there who are not sure that this program may work for them. I am here to tell just make a commitment to the program and you will succeed. Take care and God Bless.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jun 08, 2008 12:52 pm

BNA - what an awesome post. I am very proud of you for handling the situation the way you did! Now with that behind you - you should continue to have the confidence that you can do this the next time and the next time and the next time! You can do it!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 6:28 am

Thank you so much for sharing this story. It helps others so much to hear good things. I wish you well as you continue your journey

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 7:24 am

I am so glad everyone was able to walk away from this accident. It sounds like you were one of the lucky ones too by handling the situation the way you did. I hope this gives you more confidence in your recovery process. I'll say a little prayer for all involved.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 1:28 pm

Thank you all for all your kind words and well wishes. It has meant so much to me. I am definitely changed by this situation. It amazes me but I feel so Blessed at this moment in my life. My husband and this other driver are both ok, Thank God and so I am . I feel so empowered and strong to survived this. I am really very proud of myself. Thank God and this program for helping me to achieve this. Take care and God bless/

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 3:44 pm

You go girl! Congrats on SHOWING your growth. Hope hubby is feeling fine. Your story is an inspiration to us all!