Posted: Wed Mar 10, 2010 4:58 am
Hi Lilly,
Taking on anything new is stressful. When I went back to school in my thirties, the first year, especially, was awful--but congratulations to you for taking on more education. Some helpful things that have been passed along to me, I'd like to pass along to you:
Meds can lose their effectiveness over time-sometimes you do need to change dosage or med and it's not because YOU are at fault in any way--it's just the way of the medicine.
Everyone has a different view on meds. I've had quite a variety of experiences with them, and I've come to know and accept that my life with them is better than my life without them.
The right medication won't "fix" you; but it can level the playing field, so that YOU can start dealing with what you want to work on. And also, if it's a 'crutch'? Who cares? Would you deny a person with a broken leg a pair of crutches? do what works for you.
Early on, thankfully I was told by a professor of mine, that when you're feeling the best, is, strangely enough, exactly when you start thinking that you don't need the additional help anymore. And then of course, once you quit doing what made you feel better, you start feeling even worse, with the added benefit (lol) that now you beat yourself up for 'failing'. And the vicious cyle restarts with a vengeance.
So, that said, ease up and be kind to yourself. All of this is a learning process and the most valuable information has come to me through other folks like me--and you, and all of us--
You said you were wondering what to think? You should be proud of yourself for trying. Be proud of yourself for school, for having the good sense to call your husband, for your courage in trying yet again.
And maybe next time you feel anxious about the driving, plug in the Relax tape and tell yourself that you'll only drive as far as you can--and if you don't make it farther than five minutes from your house, so be it--give yourself permission to turn around and go home if you feel like it.
Be gentle to yourself,
sorry to be so wordy,
Karen
Taking on anything new is stressful. When I went back to school in my thirties, the first year, especially, was awful--but congratulations to you for taking on more education. Some helpful things that have been passed along to me, I'd like to pass along to you:
Meds can lose their effectiveness over time-sometimes you do need to change dosage or med and it's not because YOU are at fault in any way--it's just the way of the medicine.
Everyone has a different view on meds. I've had quite a variety of experiences with them, and I've come to know and accept that my life with them is better than my life without them.
The right medication won't "fix" you; but it can level the playing field, so that YOU can start dealing with what you want to work on. And also, if it's a 'crutch'? Who cares? Would you deny a person with a broken leg a pair of crutches? do what works for you.
Early on, thankfully I was told by a professor of mine, that when you're feeling the best, is, strangely enough, exactly when you start thinking that you don't need the additional help anymore. And then of course, once you quit doing what made you feel better, you start feeling even worse, with the added benefit (lol) that now you beat yourself up for 'failing'. And the vicious cyle restarts with a vengeance.
So, that said, ease up and be kind to yourself. All of this is a learning process and the most valuable information has come to me through other folks like me--and you, and all of us--
You said you were wondering what to think? You should be proud of yourself for trying. Be proud of yourself for school, for having the good sense to call your husband, for your courage in trying yet again.
And maybe next time you feel anxious about the driving, plug in the Relax tape and tell yourself that you'll only drive as far as you can--and if you don't make it farther than five minutes from your house, so be it--give yourself permission to turn around and go home if you feel like it.
Be gentle to yourself,
sorry to be so wordy,
Karen