Hi ladies, Hope things are being manageable.
I have been nearly overwhelmed with things since taking on Moms well being. I do believe the sibling rivalry has crested and can now have things get to a steady pace and schedule. whew what a ride. I will give a much more detailed version soon as I am able and i do miss you folks.
J, do get with the alzheimers assoc, they will get you in touch with info and preventative knowlege for your DH. They are wonderful folks that are there to help and because they want to be there not because they have to be. You will see what I mean. Best wishes for you and the earlier it is diagnosed and worked with the better the outcome. Bless ya in your efforts.
Tina I hope your fit as a fiddle and keeping the ball rolling.
Later
R
Dear Diary
Re: Dear Diary
Hi R.,
I'm so glad that things are settling down for you and becoming more manageable. Thank goodness!!
I am on an interesting sort of "inner journey". It's so hard to explain, but I'll try...
I am needed. My DH needs me, Brooke needs me and calls me to talk her off the ledge approx 3X per day, Julie needs me and does the same, etc.
I read recently that that is not a good thing to always be so needed. I have to get to the bottom of why I seem to thrive in always being needed. So, I recognize that it isn't necessarily a great trait, and maybe especially if I need something too.
So, I also identified a feeling I've been walking around with. I was calling it "anxiety" until I thought about it further and recognize that I'm feeling "fear". Fear for my future. So many uncertainties. I can take care of anyone and everyone but I'm afraid to take care of myself once and for all.
I told this to Dr. Welby. I said I feel "fear" constantly now. She said "it's about time". She said I have been in denial and compartmentalizing my life like no-one she has ever seen before. Now, I am no longer compartmentalizing anything and I am scared. I will some day have to depend on ME.
I've been applying for jobs and will follow up next week with phone calls. We've only been here less then two weeks but I've accomplished much.
But sometimes I am so afraid. What if something happens to DH? Who will take care of me?
Will I be able to take care of me?
That's the big question that I have been too afraid to ask.
Love to all.
XOXO
J.
I'm so glad that things are settling down for you and becoming more manageable. Thank goodness!!
I am on an interesting sort of "inner journey". It's so hard to explain, but I'll try...
I am needed. My DH needs me, Brooke needs me and calls me to talk her off the ledge approx 3X per day, Julie needs me and does the same, etc.
I read recently that that is not a good thing to always be so needed. I have to get to the bottom of why I seem to thrive in always being needed. So, I recognize that it isn't necessarily a great trait, and maybe especially if I need something too.
So, I also identified a feeling I've been walking around with. I was calling it "anxiety" until I thought about it further and recognize that I'm feeling "fear". Fear for my future. So many uncertainties. I can take care of anyone and everyone but I'm afraid to take care of myself once and for all.
I told this to Dr. Welby. I said I feel "fear" constantly now. She said "it's about time". She said I have been in denial and compartmentalizing my life like no-one she has ever seen before. Now, I am no longer compartmentalizing anything and I am scared. I will some day have to depend on ME.
I've been applying for jobs and will follow up next week with phone calls. We've only been here less then two weeks but I've accomplished much.
But sometimes I am so afraid. What if something happens to DH? Who will take care of me?
Will I be able to take care of me?
That's the big question that I have been too afraid to ask.
Love to all.
XOXO
J.
Re: Dear Diary
Dear Diary,
Ok. I've been in Fl for exactly one month today. I just got back from the beach with my best friend where we swam all morning.
Diary, are you sitting down? I have my first job interview tonight at 6pm. There is a very upscale 4 star boutique hotel one block from my house and they are hiring a front desk attendant. The manager just called me (OH MY GOSH HE IS SUCH AN ASS) but anyway he wants to meet me for an interview tonight. The job I'm applying for is a salaried position with benefits.
Wish me luck because I will need it. The manager is in love with himself and doesn't have great phone skills to say the least but maybe he was having a bad moment today.
I'm scared.
Love,
J.
Ok. I've been in Fl for exactly one month today. I just got back from the beach with my best friend where we swam all morning.
Diary, are you sitting down? I have my first job interview tonight at 6pm. There is a very upscale 4 star boutique hotel one block from my house and they are hiring a front desk attendant. The manager just called me (OH MY GOSH HE IS SUCH AN ASS) but anyway he wants to meet me for an interview tonight. The job I'm applying for is a salaried position with benefits.
Wish me luck because I will need it. The manager is in love with himself and doesn't have great phone skills to say the least but maybe he was having a bad moment today.
I'm scared.
Love,
J.
-
tina martin
- Posts: 792
- Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2010 9:24 pm
Re: Dear Diary
Do not be scared. He's lucky to get you. If he can't see that send him to a good optometrist. Be cool, calm, and just your beautiful self.
Lots of luck, XO.......T
Lots of luck, XO.......T
Re: Dear Diary
Thanks Tina.
The interview went GREAT!! I met with the director of operations and he feels I am a great fit. They have completely "cleaned house" over the past 2 months and are in the process of building a new team. I would be in charge of problem solving and decision making at the front desk. He liked that "I know and understand their guests", so to speak.
He wasn't a jerk at all. He was very professional and I liked him a lot. So, the next step is an interview with the head of HR and if that goes well I will meet with the manager of the hotel for an interview. He said if I don't hear from HR by Monday to call him.
I feel so happy right now. It is so tough to get a job in this economy but I feel like I might have landed a perfect position. He is a team builder and is looking for a professional person that excels at multi tasking. That's me.
I hope you are well. Please don't be a stranger and tell me about YOU.
XOXOXO
J.
The interview went GREAT!! I met with the director of operations and he feels I am a great fit. They have completely "cleaned house" over the past 2 months and are in the process of building a new team. I would be in charge of problem solving and decision making at the front desk. He liked that "I know and understand their guests", so to speak.
He wasn't a jerk at all. He was very professional and I liked him a lot. So, the next step is an interview with the head of HR and if that goes well I will meet with the manager of the hotel for an interview. He said if I don't hear from HR by Monday to call him.
I feel so happy right now. It is so tough to get a job in this economy but I feel like I might have landed a perfect position. He is a team builder and is looking for a professional person that excels at multi tasking. That's me.
I hope you are well. Please don't be a stranger and tell me about YOU.
XOXOXO
J.
-
tina martin
- Posts: 792
- Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2010 9:24 pm
Re: Dear Diary
Such good news, happy for you. You are so capable, smart, competent. All you have accomplished speaks volumes of the person you are which I always recognized. Just remember: don't despair if this is not what you think it may be; something else will be.
There would be a few things to report, but basically I am holding on with much varied exercise, meditation every day twice a day, plus Qigong (sort of standing meditation) which The Old Boy and I do every morning to slow music. So despite some terrible things, I am mostly at peace. Thankful I do not have to look for work because I could not do a SINGLE THING. Am rooting for you. Love...........T
There would be a few things to report, but basically I am holding on with much varied exercise, meditation every day twice a day, plus Qigong (sort of standing meditation) which The Old Boy and I do every morning to slow music. So despite some terrible things, I am mostly at peace. Thankful I do not have to look for work because I could not do a SINGLE THING. Am rooting for you. Love...........T
Re: Dear Diary
Dear Diary:
I was staying over at my mom's place for a couple of days when she started to have chest pains.
She called 911 and they took her to the hospital emergency room. She was admitted to the
hospital. A few days later she got a pacemaker for her heart. She was released from the hospital
after being in there for an entire week. She has recently been having problems with her pulse
and it has been out of control. Now, with the pacemaker, her heart rate is back to normal.
I stayed at her place for a couple of weeks during her illness, so I was not at my own apartment.
I visited her at the hospital every day and after she was discharged I helped her follow-up on
her doctors appointments. She is feeling more like herself now and she is getting back to her
regular routine(s). She is 82 years old and she lives alone. She takes care of herself, but also
has a helper lady come in twice a week to help her out with personal care and house-cleaning.
I try to help her out by taking her to her doctors appointments and by taking her to the grocery
store and to the drug store. I usually spend two days and two nights of each week at her condo
with her, keeping her company and trying to be a good daughter for her.
It has been a tiring and long two weeks now. The last time my mom
was in the hospital for heart problems was in February 2012. I hope she does well on the pacemaker
and that she does not have to go back to the hospital soon.
Lynda
I was staying over at my mom's place for a couple of days when she started to have chest pains.
She called 911 and they took her to the hospital emergency room. She was admitted to the
hospital. A few days later she got a pacemaker for her heart. She was released from the hospital
after being in there for an entire week. She has recently been having problems with her pulse
and it has been out of control. Now, with the pacemaker, her heart rate is back to normal.
I stayed at her place for a couple of weeks during her illness, so I was not at my own apartment.
I visited her at the hospital every day and after she was discharged I helped her follow-up on
her doctors appointments. She is feeling more like herself now and she is getting back to her
regular routine(s). She is 82 years old and she lives alone. She takes care of herself, but also
has a helper lady come in twice a week to help her out with personal care and house-cleaning.
I try to help her out by taking her to her doctors appointments and by taking her to the grocery
store and to the drug store. I usually spend two days and two nights of each week at her condo
with her, keeping her company and trying to be a good daughter for her.
It has been a tiring and long two weeks now. The last time my mom
was in the hospital for heart problems was in February 2012. I hope she does well on the pacemaker
and that she does not have to go back to the hospital soon.
Lynda
Re: Dear Diary
Hi Tina and Lynda!
Tina, I have been thinking about you as I've started mindful meditation once a week in a group and I'm also taking yoga again every Thursday night. My friend's friend holds classes in her home and it's really fun. I love it and think of you when I'm doing my different stretches, etc.
Tina, mindfulness is so interesting. I'm sure that your advanced practices have made you into the lovely and serene person that you are. I can't imagine standing in one position for a very long period of time. Your muscles must be so strong.
When we practice mindfulness the instructor tries to put us in a sort of trance. We visualize going down 10 steps and stepping into our perfect utopia and all these other visualizations. I always imagine going down the steps of a boat into clear blue water, etc.
This week my mind wandered and I was thinking about how you do this and are so good at it and then I realized my mind was wandering. Practice makes perfect I guess.
Lynda, you are such a fantastic person and daughter to be giving your mother the care she needs at this stage in her life. Don't forget to take care of YOU.
So, I continue to talk to Brooke every day on the phone and I send her Books to read and we discuss them. Her release date is September 26th and it won't be soon enough.
Julie's fiancé just landed a great new job with great benefits and insurance so they are happy. The wedding is 8/4.
AND
I have my 2nd interview for the front desk position at the boutique hotel on Monday at 11AM. Dr. Welby wants me to be assertive and tell them that I am the best person to assure that their guests are satisfied and happy and I will be a valuable asset to their establishment. Blah blah blah. She said to tell them that I must have a full time position with benefits.
I have to practice being assertive. I'll work on it. It's SO hard to land a job, but I think my chances are fair to good at this point.
Rick, I hope you are taking care of YOU too and enjoying being outdoors with your cute dogs.
I swim in the ocean almost every day.
Love to all.
J.
XOXOXO
PS
Editing is so annoying.
More XO's
Tina, I have been thinking about you as I've started mindful meditation once a week in a group and I'm also taking yoga again every Thursday night. My friend's friend holds classes in her home and it's really fun. I love it and think of you when I'm doing my different stretches, etc.
Tina, mindfulness is so interesting. I'm sure that your advanced practices have made you into the lovely and serene person that you are. I can't imagine standing in one position for a very long period of time. Your muscles must be so strong.
When we practice mindfulness the instructor tries to put us in a sort of trance. We visualize going down 10 steps and stepping into our perfect utopia and all these other visualizations. I always imagine going down the steps of a boat into clear blue water, etc.
This week my mind wandered and I was thinking about how you do this and are so good at it and then I realized my mind was wandering. Practice makes perfect I guess.
Lynda, you are such a fantastic person and daughter to be giving your mother the care she needs at this stage in her life. Don't forget to take care of YOU.
So, I continue to talk to Brooke every day on the phone and I send her Books to read and we discuss them. Her release date is September 26th and it won't be soon enough.
Julie's fiancé just landed a great new job with great benefits and insurance so they are happy. The wedding is 8/4.
AND
I have my 2nd interview for the front desk position at the boutique hotel on Monday at 11AM. Dr. Welby wants me to be assertive and tell them that I am the best person to assure that their guests are satisfied and happy and I will be a valuable asset to their establishment. Blah blah blah. She said to tell them that I must have a full time position with benefits.
I have to practice being assertive. I'll work on it. It's SO hard to land a job, but I think my chances are fair to good at this point.
Rick, I hope you are taking care of YOU too and enjoying being outdoors with your cute dogs.
I swim in the ocean almost every day.
Love to all.
J.
XOXOXO
PS
Editing is so annoying.
More XO's
-
tina martin
- Posts: 792
- Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2010 9:24 pm
Re: Dear Diary
J, so glad to hear from you. Meditation is not easy necessarily. Not always for me either. It is good to do it in a group, can also be done alone. I sit twice a day, am and pm, 15minutes. The mind will wander but we bring it back to whatever we want. It can be wonderful in many ways. I also do Qigong which I consider standing meditation. Similar to Tai Chi, but easier. Go to yoga at city rec. centers Mon. and Fri. but do Sun Salutations and other poses right at home to nice music.
Julie is very fortunate with her husband to be. He seems like a great guy. Books with Brooke long distance is excellent. read countless books with son that way. Joy. Sept. is not far off. And, yes, be assertive re the job. Toot your own horn because you are a fabulous person.
Julie is very fortunate with her husband to be. He seems like a great guy. Books with Brooke long distance is excellent. read countless books with son that way. Joy. Sept. is not far off. And, yes, be assertive re the job. Toot your own horn because you are a fabulous person.
Re: Dear Diary
I love you Tina. Just saying. I really love you. XO