bad relationship situation and dont know what to do
I just broke up with my girlfriend of two years.and I am just starting this program today. over the past two years it was constant fighting mainly because she kept bringing up the past of things that happened before we were together. sometimes I would react back in horrible ways and get angry and start yelling. but finnaly two weeks ago I just could not take it any more and I left. she started telling me that I did not love her and that if we broke up the next girl that gave me a chance I would just jump in it even if i did not love her. well any ways she called and left a message last week saying that all she cares about is if I love her she wanted to try again I have not called her back yet but I want to so bad. I do love her more than anything but the thing holding me back is that this same repetative pattern happens over and over all the time we get in a fight I leave she she she will quit worrying about thing and accusing me of them and i come back. I just need some advice on what to do
-
Guest
Hi there!
I'm certainly not an expert on this type of thing - not at all.
However, my thought is that this is probably a habit on both your parts. You say you've been fighting for 2 years.
So it seems like you should slow down on this for awhile. Maybe you should work on the program first. You might suggest that she , too, could get the program and work on herself.
But separately for awhile. You guys could visit on the phone at times and give each other some space. It sounds like that maybe the both of you have some self-esteem issues.
If the each of you could gain some trust and peach within yourselves - then you might be able to make it later on - in a more mature relationship.
But the main issue now is for both of you to learn to be complete within yourselves.
You see, no one else can make you happy. No one else can make you complete.
First you have to be whole within and then you walk side by side, facing outward , not leaning one on the other. Two people just enjoying each other , without demands but sharing your differences. with trust.
I think the program will help you acheive this.
Just slow down and grow to like yourself.
There is no hurry.
Mary Jane
I'm certainly not an expert on this type of thing - not at all.
However, my thought is that this is probably a habit on both your parts. You say you've been fighting for 2 years.
So it seems like you should slow down on this for awhile. Maybe you should work on the program first. You might suggest that she , too, could get the program and work on herself.
But separately for awhile. You guys could visit on the phone at times and give each other some space. It sounds like that maybe the both of you have some self-esteem issues.
If the each of you could gain some trust and peach within yourselves - then you might be able to make it later on - in a more mature relationship.
But the main issue now is for both of you to learn to be complete within yourselves.
You see, no one else can make you happy. No one else can make you complete.
First you have to be whole within and then you walk side by side, facing outward , not leaning one on the other. Two people just enjoying each other , without demands but sharing your differences. with trust.
I think the program will help you acheive this.
Just slow down and grow to like yourself.
There is no hurry.
Mary Jane
-
Guest
I agree. I don't know how old you guys are but life is constant growing. You won't be any happier continuing the same old cycle. Take the time to help yourself and grow. If you ever want to have a healthy relationship with her or anyone else . A healthy relationship is not selfish. I had to learn that the hard way...and to be honest I'm still learing and trying. Well, don't get too down about it. I think you made the right decision to stop the "madness" it was wise of you to step away for now. You don't have to decide anything right now. What's meant to be will be. That's just how I think. Well, I hope my rambling helps. I'm not that good at articulating my thoughts...but that's ok. 