ocd thoughts ra escaring the crap out of me!

PGood21 · Post by **PGood21** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 11:47 am

haha wow..well my name is Patrick..yours is Patricia..maybe that has something to do with it??? lol

jk! But anyway I know exactly how hard it is to deal with these stupid thoughts. You can try to ignore them all you want, and even though you know you're not the type of person who would hurt yourself for instance (and I know you aren't) you still feel the fear of the thought all the same. But they are just thoughts..remember you aren't going to lose control! You are too strong..and you will overcome this stupid condition we have..just because we have it though doesn't make us weak..I mean people don't make fun of people with Diabetes..it's just a condition, and we can all overcome it! I'm actually afraid to eat and drink right now..hahaha..the most basic forms of survival, and I'm afraid of it because I'm afraid someone might slip some drugs or poison in my food..but I have to force myself to eat because I know I can't live otherwise..that's the key to feeling better because until 4 days ago I was over my anxiety..just keep going with your life and remember that when ur at rock bottom there's no way to go but up..don't let stress take control..it's gonna be alright I know;)

chrit · Post by **chrit** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 3:36 pm

Hey Patrick and Patricia, my name is Christi so I guess it is not a name thing. LOL. I hate this crap!!!!!! Mine started about a year ago when i was put on some med for the stroke i had and then BAMMM!!!! One night I was thinking what if i drown my son in the tub, could i!!1 This was so scary i went straight into a panic. The hospital told me that it was the med and they were gonna keep me there (Ina therauputic enviroment, LOL) until the med got out of my system. WHATEVER, they threw me in ACT a crisis center with people with true mental illnesses and they told me the freakest stuff from i was gonna kill my kids to the devil was in me, to the people that worked here were gonna make me crazy and that they wouldnt listen to me or anything. Well I survived and got out 5 days later but about two weeks after started doubting reality and was my son really there and could i go crazy and hurt them or me. This makes me so sick and I too can not eat or sleep. I tackled the thoughts and they were away for a while but then the other night I watched a movied where a guy lost touch with reality and then it started. then i heard on the news where a man klled his 3 kids one at a time in a motel!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HELP HELP HELP now the freakin thoughts started and i cant stop them . HELP HELP , I need a friend. Sorry so long.

PGood21 · Post by **PGood21** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 4:54 pm

I definitely understand how that is Chrit!! But you are not a bad person!! If you were truly evil and wanted to kill your son..you already would have done it! The reason you get so scared and sick is the mere fact that you do care so much, and you love so much! People like us love more than the average person i think because we think so much more and probably more deeply than most..but you are NOT crazy. I really freaked out when I watched the movie A Beautiful Mind..but I got over it..you just have to find things that you enjoy that occupy your mind in the time the obsessive thoughts try to..I know it's not easy because I deal with it daily..even right now..but honestly..you are NOT going to kill your child..you LOVE your child and I know because you get so worried it makes you sick..one day we will all be free of this burden, and imagine how much stronger we will be for it! Remember..God never puts more on our plates than we can handle..when you think ur sinkin to rock bottom..just remember the sunlight always shines after the rain..you should be thankful..everyday should be a celebration of life!!

Sit-N-Spin · Post by **Sit-N-Spin** » Mon Apr 28, 2008 7:04 am

BeatAnxiety07 great info thnx !!!!!!!!!

Ri · Post by Ri » Wed May 14, 2008 5:17 pm

Here's something I think will help......Always remember petafiles or serial killers get a sense of joy from their actions. In other words, it mskes them feel good to do those things not scared. They love it not fear it.So the fact that you worry and fear it -is a good sign!!!!!!!Keep that in mind for the next time you see something horrible on tv.
Keep in touch. (:

lucie · Post by **lucie** » Fri May 16, 2008 2:39 am

I also have thought of harming kids and my own child. So much so that I cannot sleep or wake in a panic that I did something wrong. Then the doubting and checking start. I will get so emotional over the thoughts that I will cry to the point of vomiting. Not a fun cycle. It seems to occur more with stress in my life, and I actually will "feel" myself come down from the level of anxiety. This actually happened last night. Today I see things clear, and my thoughts seem silly. It's a hard process, much harder than anything I have ever dealt with. Just letting you know you're not alone.
Lucie

sackingzlover · Post by **sackingzlover** » Sun May 18, 2008 7:47 pm

i have had this since i was 16. these thoughts will pass. it might come up everey now and then.there is something bothering you that u don't want to deal with. was there any trauma in your life? is things in your life thatt are stressful. you won't act on these thoughts it is your mind believe it or not tring to protect you from really bothering you..try to journal and write if you do hat it might help to give you insight to what is bothering you..your not alone. accept these thoughts try not to be afraid of them.. easier said than done i know but they will pass

sackingzlover · Post by **sackingzlover** » Sun May 18, 2008 7:54 pm

i guess that was a year ago my bad...