Feeling Upset Today

DebDeb · Post by **DebDeb** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:30 am

I keep thinking about moving forward in our relationship and having a baby. My husband
has an addiction problem (it is under control now)
but there have been a few issues that I haven't been so happy about lately.
I cried in my car this a.m. while stuck in traffic. I am SO SCARED of moving forward.
Then to TOP IT off I had mentioned to my mother
that his neck is still bothering him and that he
went back to the pain doctor.
She says; OH he is doing this an excuse just to get painkillers. !!!!!!! WTF!!!!!!!??????? I blew up at her and told her that I am not talking to her anymore if she is going to make up stories like that.
I am going to just ignore her because she blows everything out of proportion. (the Overprotective narcissistic parent).

jugray · Post by **jugray** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:44 am

Sometimes I feel like our emotions are connected. I am crying this morning as well, but for no apparent reason. Just woke up this morning with the blues and now I'm at work and my eyes keep welling up with tears. I don't know what is wrong with me. I had a great day yesterday. I have 26 third graders asking me what's wrong and I've had to tell them I got makeup in my eye!!!

DebDeb · Post by **DebDeb** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:07 am

Awww; I hope you feel better too!

I just wrote down all of my feelings this a.m.
and it really helped me to put everything in perspective.
I am trying to use my skills of being positive and trying to keep it all under control.
I can't change my mother's behavior and I can't
change a lot of negativity in my life but I will
try to accept it and move forward<--this is the
hardest part for me.
My mother is very negative and she feeds on anything that concerns me and makes it one hundred times worse. No sympathy or consolations
from her.

There must be something that is worrying you -
sometimes our subconscious mind keeps it hidden.

Superman · Post by **Superman** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:09 am

Deb.
This program is teaching us to walk slower, but most important.... never walk backwards.
Forward is the place you want to go, and yes it is scary.
I was doing well but never was my total self, so I've decided to try this program,
My anxiety has risen ever since. but its normal, I'm looking inwards and feeling and question every motion,
I know in time I will be able to control my anxiety. I'm getting there.
So if there are day that you feel like cry, have a good cry, but afterwards try to find out why you did, this will eleminate the anxious feeling.
As for your Mom.
Well Mom;s will be Mom;s.
Bottom line, I don;t think there are trying to hurt us, only pretect us. But they forget that the baby bird has already flown away from the nest.
Deb, be kind to yourself don't be too hard on yourself, that was and still is one of my biggest problems tht I'm working on.
Ciao Steven

sleeplessMom · Post by **sleeplessMom** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:11 am

DebDeb: I know what you mean about feeling stuck. But I think that is part of this condition. I have trouble with any kind of change, and you are contemplating a big change in your life.

jugray: I just responded to you private message. I hope your day improved. I cry too when I don't sleep, and I have two kids at home (4 and 8 now), and I tell them I cry sometimes when I have trouble sleeping, and they seem to accept that. The makeup in the eye is a good idea. I should have tried that at work!

Jennifier · Post by **Jennifier** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:21 am

Deb
I have a mother in law lije your mom. I know how you feel. It is hard going through addictions to anything and I pray that your husband will be able to get through his addiction and keep it out of his life. I pray you will find the answers to the whole baby issue. Maybe you aren't ready yet if you are still thinking about it. It is something you don't want to jump into unless you are 100% ready. Maybe you are doubting things in your life because you aren't sure whether it has changed or not so test the waters and make sure you and your husband are both ready for a baby. And remember that babies are blessings from God. God bless you! I pray that your tears will stop and that you will find peace!

DebDeb · Post by **DebDeb** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:34 am

Originally posted by Superman:
Deb.
This program is teaching us to walk slower, but most important.... never walk backwards.
Forward is the place you want to go, and yes it is scary.
I was doing well but never was my total self, so I've decided to try this program,
My anxiety has risen ever since. but its normal, I'm looking inwards and feeling and question every motion,
I know in time I will be able to control my anxiety. I'm getting there.
So if there are day that you feel like cry, have a good cry, but afterwards try to find out why you did, this will eleminate the anxious feeling.
As for your Mom.
Well Mom;s will be Mom;s.
Bottom line, I don;t think there are trying to hurt us, only pretect us. But they forget that the baby bird has already flown away from the nest.
Deb, be kind to yourself don't be too hard on yourself, that was and still is one of my biggest problems tht I'm working on.
Ciao Steven

Hi Steve

You are right I should be more patient with myself- I am not ready to move forward just yet because this morning's anxiety just justifies it. I hope this program will help me face my fears but I am not going to dwell on it. and
beat myself up over it if I am not ready yet.

DebDeb · Post by **DebDeb** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:36 am

Originally posted by sleeplessMom:
DebDeb: I know what you mean about feeling stuck. But I think that is part of this condition. I have trouble with any kind of change, and you are contemplating a big change in your life.

jugray: I just responded to you private message. I hope your day improved. I cry too when I don't sleep, and I have two kids at home (4 and 8 now), and I tell them I cry sometimes when I have trouble sleeping, and they seem to accept that. The makeup in the eye is a good idea. I should have tried that at work!

You are right-it is a big life event that I am
contemplating-
Do you know that song; Everybody wants to rule
the world? That's what made me cry LOL

Sybil · Post by **Sybil** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:37 am

Tell your mom less & try to keep it positive; that really might help. Best to you!

DebDeb · Post by **DebDeb** » Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:39 am

Originally posted by Jennifier:
Deb
I have a mother in law lije your mom. I know how you feel. It is hard going through addictions to anything and I pray that your husband will be able to get through his addiction and keep it out of his life. I pray you will find the answers to the whole baby issue. Maybe you aren't ready yet if you are still thinking about it. It is something you don't want to jump into unless you are 100% ready. Maybe you are doubting things in your life because you aren't sure whether it has changed or not so test the waters and make sure you and your husband are both ready for a baby. And remember that babies are blessings from God. God bless you! I pray that your tears will stop and that you will find peace!

Thank you for your wise words. I am not sure
if it's because I am not sure of HIM or if it's just my anxiety/fear of a major life change.
Probably a little of both I guess. You are right
babies are a blessing but I am not sure if I am
ready but there is also pressure as the biological clock ticks (think of Allie McBeal)