Hi,
I am usually a very positive thinker and self-motivator, however, since I started this program I feel like I am going through the motions. Although I am doing the relaxation audio, listening to my sessions 3 times a week, watching the coaching dvd, and doing the work in the workbook... I don't feel like "distracting" myself with the tools we've learned when I feel anxious or depressed. I kind of soak in my own sadness, sleep, or space out and do nothing. I know that I need to just stop complaining and get up and do it, but I've been a weird funk. For instance, for years I've been extremely positive about my issues and have pushed forward but in doing so I haven't truly dealt with some of my emotions because I distract all too well. I have a tendency to create this busy schedule that doesn't allow me to deal with my sorrows. Now that I have slowed my life down in all ways I am struggling with really sitting with my emotions without avoiding them with distractors. I understand that we should distract but what if this has been my vice. I don't feel like I'm accepting how I feel when I do this. How do I balance healthy distracting from anxiety & depression and distracting myself to the point of avoiding my problems like I always do?
Distracting Myself
Hi Sweetspassion3,
Sometimes it is good to change the word "distraction" to "diversion". To temporarily forget how we are feeling, we sometimes do other things. We divert our thinking. We are overriding our subconscious mind into believing that anxiousness doesn't exist. The conscious mind, through these diversions, is redirecting the subconscious mind into thinking that there is something better and more fun to to concentrate on. We obviously come back to being aware of our anxiety but during the diversions we feel better. So, it's all about using diversions to train the conscious mind into "tricking" or "fooling" the subconsious mind. If we practice it enough we can actually replace the subsconscious' anxious, scary thoughts with positive, healthy thoughts. It takes lots and lots of practice.
Please don't think that distraction is bad or that it is "avoiding" problems. It isn't. It is a key technique to teach the conscious mind to alter the subconscious mind, where all of our anxiousness exists. It is replacing the old, negative thinking with new, positive thinking. When you do this and practice this many times, it will become second nature and anxiousness will become less and less.
You ARE on the right track with distraction (or diversion). A busy schedule is a good thing if it is doing things that you like and that are interesting to you. By doing these things your conscious mind (actions) is interrupting the negative self-talk of the subconscious mind and allowing changes to take place whether or not you recognize it right now.
You are doing fine. Distraction (diversion) is a HUGE key to overcoming anxiety. Good luck!
Sometimes it is good to change the word "distraction" to "diversion". To temporarily forget how we are feeling, we sometimes do other things. We divert our thinking. We are overriding our subconscious mind into believing that anxiousness doesn't exist. The conscious mind, through these diversions, is redirecting the subconscious mind into thinking that there is something better and more fun to to concentrate on. We obviously come back to being aware of our anxiety but during the diversions we feel better. So, it's all about using diversions to train the conscious mind into "tricking" or "fooling" the subconsious mind. If we practice it enough we can actually replace the subsconscious' anxious, scary thoughts with positive, healthy thoughts. It takes lots and lots of practice.
Please don't think that distraction is bad or that it is "avoiding" problems. It isn't. It is a key technique to teach the conscious mind to alter the subconscious mind, where all of our anxiousness exists. It is replacing the old, negative thinking with new, positive thinking. When you do this and practice this many times, it will become second nature and anxiousness will become less and less.
You ARE on the right track with distraction (or diversion). A busy schedule is a good thing if it is doing things that you like and that are interesting to you. By doing these things your conscious mind (actions) is interrupting the negative self-talk of the subconscious mind and allowing changes to take place whether or not you recognize it right now.
You are doing fine. Distraction (diversion) is a HUGE key to overcoming anxiety. Good luck!
Sweetpassion3, I think it's ok for you to sometimes allow yourself a day of no motivation. It's normal to have good and bad days. You said you were still listening to the cd's which I think is a good thing. Are you writing down your negative thoughts and counteracting them with positive ones? Don't forget to do ALL the work. Just like your post here, maybe your last few days you just weren't feeling it, but good for you for still listening to the cd's! As for you distracting yourself from your sorrows, that's a great thing. The whole idea of this program is to help us eliminate us from our sorrows. But distracting yourself from your problems won't make them go away. Deal with your problems, but just try and do it on a day your feel very strong and positive! Good luck!
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Sweetspassion3
- Posts: 7
- Joined: Wed Nov 17, 2010 10:18 am
@FrvrNumb Yes, I am writing down my negative and positive thoughts...the life coach I have for this program actually encouraged me to set aside 15 minutes of worry time where I am writing down my worries then asking myself can I change/control/fix it? If the answer is yes, I write a more positive realistic thought to counterbalance it. But if the answer is no, I do my best to let it go... then to relax after. This is easier said than done, but I've done it this whole week and it has helped. It has helped for me to worry during a set time of the day & to not worry about my issues again til tomorrows worry time. This has helped me to do a whole lot of journaling I hadn't "felt" like doing...but we're anxious people...I need my worry time, so it kinda forces me to do it! 
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Paisleegreen
- Posts: 1778
- Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:27 pm
Hi Sweet Passion--I wonder about that as well. I get very busy with my distractions or diversions and then my family wants to take them away from me, in so many words. So then I'm really left w/o my distractions that I guess the family didn't like! 
So now I'm here and with a new psychologist trying to get it all figured out.
Even my Psychologist would question the different things that were bothering me or that I was blaming my anxiety on. So he is trying to get that figured out, what is the real problem.
I'm glad you able to journal your worries and ask the questions of what you can do about them. I guess that is what I'm suppose to do w/ hubby is take care of one of my main frustrations is an unfinished bathroom. Boy, did that open a whole new can of worms! LOL! But I guess if DH and I can work this out, then we will have made a lot of progress in what brings me anxiety.
You go girl! Keep working those 15 mins. Paislee
So now I'm here and with a new psychologist trying to get it all figured out. Even my Psychologist would question the different things that were bothering me or that I was blaming my anxiety on. So he is trying to get that figured out, what is the real problem.
I'm glad you able to journal your worries and ask the questions of what you can do about them. I guess that is what I'm suppose to do w/ hubby is take care of one of my main frustrations is an unfinished bathroom. Boy, did that open a whole new can of worms! LOL!
But I guess if DH and I can work this out, then we will have made a lot of progress in what brings me anxiety. You go girl! Keep working those 15 mins.
Paislee