Hello Everyone,
I'm really in need of support from people who understand what I have/how I think. I'm going through a very difficult time right now emotionally. I'm currently in my second semester of teacher's college and I'm scared to death that I'm not smart enought for the program and that I'm in way over my head. I'm in a placement right now where I'm learning from a grade 6 mentor teacher. Just by watching her I'm filled with an incredible amount of anxiety and feelings of inadequacy. I just really want to be good at something and feel good about myself. I really feel like the only thing I have in life is an incredible amount of pain, anxiety and depression. I'm finding it harder and harder to function and enjoy life. I have been "working on" my anxiety for about 8 years now and I dont feel like I've made any progress other than gaining a greater understanding of what anxiety and depression is and what causes it. Although I recognize and accept the fact that it is my thoughts and feelings that create my pain and suffering, it feels like I have no control over them. No matter what I do (hypnotize, breathe, challenge the thoughts) the terrible feeling is still there. I'm 24 years old and I'm terrified for the future. I would rather stay in bed than go out into the world every day and feel insecure, afraid, uncomfortable everyday. I dont get why I'm like this! I have great friends, an amazing family and I had a great girlfriend. I don't want to live this way anymore, I dont see the point. Help!
Ben22
Need Support
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Iwillbebetter
- Posts: 484
- Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
- Location: Minnesota
Re: Need Support
I never even thought about it until reading your post, but in anything "new" I do, I never feel adaquate either. I always think I will not learn it right, and mess everything up when I am left to do it on my own. Even if deep down I know I can do it 100% my mind does not agree and knows I will screw it all up!!
Seeing/realizing is 1/2 of the fight, but I think it's staying with it that helps us to get better. We have to keep fighting the negative until there is none left. Until it becomes second nature. I believe if you keep fighting/practicing you can get better. But you have to keep doing the work.
I know I have been working at it for sometime and continue to work at it. I have still not "gotten it down" I know it will take a lot more work. But the more I do it, the better/easier it gets!!
You can do it!!
Seeing/realizing is 1/2 of the fight, but I think it's staying with it that helps us to get better. We have to keep fighting the negative until there is none left. Until it becomes second nature. I believe if you keep fighting/practicing you can get better. But you have to keep doing the work.
I know I have been working at it for sometime and continue to work at it. I have still not "gotten it down" I know it will take a lot more work. But the more I do it, the better/easier it gets!! You can do it!!
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."
Re: Need Support
I have these same fears with everything I do as well like I need to appear I understand and I am in control and I get it. Then when I make a mistake or i really don't get something I feel so stupid and inferior I just shink into my own world and I wanna run away. It is a problem that I have just started to face in the last two months and I can tell I have a long way to go. I just try to stay positive and manage my feelings as well as record them in my journal so I can process and understand what is going on. Just remember you are not alone and we are in this fight togeather and as long as we all support each other failure does not stand a chance.
Ron
Ron
Re: Need Support
I can certainly relate to what you are saying. I am a middle school teacher. I have been teaching for 11 years. And there are still days when I think..what am I doing 
But I have to stay encouraged and it is hard especially with dealing with the anxiety as well. As I write this I am having an anxious episode right now and have tears in my eyes. I have had anxiety for 9 years. Sometimes it goes away and I think I am cured than it comes back. I can say it is better now than it was two years ago. Sometimes like now I feel tired of dealing with this and just want to be "normal". But I to realize that we all have crosses to bear. Everyone is going through something. But we have to stay uplifted and encourage each other. I am taking my own advice.
If you are a religious person, prayer has really helped me in my time of despair with anxiety. Find some uplifting scriptures to help you. Most importantly don't let the anxiety win, you have power over it.
Stay encouraged, stay positive
But I have to stay encouraged and it is hard especially with dealing with the anxiety as well. As I write this I am having an anxious episode right now and have tears in my eyes. I have had anxiety for 9 years. Sometimes it goes away and I think I am cured than it comes back. I can say it is better now than it was two years ago. Sometimes like now I feel tired of dealing with this and just want to be "normal". But I to realize that we all have crosses to bear. Everyone is going through something. But we have to stay uplifted and encourage each other. I am taking my own advice.
If you are a religious person, prayer has really helped me in my time of despair with anxiety. Find some uplifting scriptures to help you. Most importantly don't let the anxiety win, you have power over it.
Stay encouraged, stay positive