I cannot handle conflicts

[SergioMart]

I am a passive person who whenever there is a conflict I immediately avoid. Like last week my brother,17, who is three years younger than I started acting out and he just goes ballistic. He started cursing out my mother and I as the eldest boy wasn't going to sit there, I swallowed my fear and we unfortunately got into a physical altercation. He ended up being kicked out of the house. And that same night while I was trying to sleep all the sudden my thoughts started racing, and the one that really made me scared was "What if I was dead?" I immediately jumped out of bed and took two of my Clonzapam meds, while pacing in my kitchen talking myself out of that thought. The next few days it kept happening and I started breaking down crying with my mother, I was really afraid. She as well as the program reassured me that they are just thoughts, death is a natural thing that happens to all of us and that I will not act on that thought. I was able to calm myself down but now there is a constant panic in my chest and stomach where I have trouble sleeping. Brother came crawling back because school was starting and I feel on my edge because I don't want this altercation to happen again. What should I do? I hate conflicts.

[RosalesT]

Hey man. I know all about trying to avoid conflicts. I do kickboxing and BJJ as a workout, but while sparring one on one with a friend of mine, the idea of having that much adrenaline and fear of hurting that person too much went into my mind. Unfortunately, when youre in the middle of it, I had other thoughts of people around me thinking I was weak or insufficient if I stepped back, so I continued on. Afterwards, my breathing became very labored, my legs were shaking uncontrollably, and I felt I was going to faint. At the same time, Im also a customer service manager, so when I have an angry customer come in, its sometimes very hard for me to find resolutions to calm them down, instead leading to me hiding away until absolutely necessary. The best I can say is that the chest pains and stomach pains are symptoms of anxiety themselves, and that the best you can do is grab an ice pack, use the breathing technique this program gives you, and use some great mantras to drown out these thoughts in your head. One I love to repeat to myself is "I am stronger than my anxiety!" Saying it with determination has shown me the best results between breaths. Just remember that you are better at handling things than what you can give yourself credit for, and to use confidence rather than fear suppression to make yourself aware of the situation

[bonita2243]

Hey man. I know all about trying to avoid conflicts. I do kickboxing and BJJ as a workout, but while sparring one on one with a friend of mine, the idea of having that much adrenaline and fear of hurting that person too much went into my mind. Unfortunately, when youre in the middle of it, I had other thoughts of people around me thinking I was weak or insufficient if I stepped back, so I continued on. Afterwards, my breathing became very labored, my legs were shaking uncontrollably, and I felt I was going to faint. At the same time, Im also a customer service manager, so when I have an angry customer come in, its sometimes very hard for me to find resolutions to calm them down, instead leading to me hiding away until absolutely necessary. The best I can say is that the chest pains and stomach pains are symptoms of anxiety themselves, and that the best you can do is grab an ice pack, use the breathing technique this program gives you, and use some great mantras to drown out these thoughts in your head. One I love to repeat to myself is "I am stronger than my anxiety!" Saying it with determination has shown me the best results between breaths. Just remember that you are better at handling things than what you can give yourself credit for, and to use confidence rather than fear suppression to make yourself aware of the situation

SORRY ABOUT YOUR BROTHER AND HOW YOU FEEEL I ALSO CANNOT HANDLE CONFLICT.