Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Don't let a setback discourage you, face the challenge and come out stronger for it. Celebrate your successes and be open to all of new opportunities that are about to come into your life.
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AP2884Moss
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:59 pm

Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by AP2884Moss » Wed Dec 21, 2011 4:53 pm

Hello everyone. I just experienced my first "growth spurt" in the last couple days and, as we all do, I'm looking for some advice or thoughts. I'm a 28 year old man, single, in Minnesota. I finished the program in February, and I was doing really, really well since then. I gradually stopped taking my medicine (Citalapram) and completely stopped about a month ago. Things were still going really well. One of my big issues is having people like me, so being assertive is tough for me. I'm also a hypochondriac and worry about the health of myself and my family. I think work has been stressing me out lately, and instead of relaxing and using the steps in Session 14, I let it get to me and finally caused a bit of a panic attack yesterday where I lost my breath and legs felt rubbery. Also, in the last couple days, my Mom told me she was getting a colonoscopy for some stomach issues. There's no blood, and she's 62 years old, so it's more of a "make sure nothing is wrong" than "something is definitely wrong". But I always expect the worst, and combining that with my negative thoughts about work recently, I think that's the main cause. Our company also laid off about 30 people between 3 buildings in the last month. So, the hardest thing is putting my finger on what exactly caused it. So then I obsess about that and keep thinking about it when I should be focusing my attention on other things. Anyway, I know this is kind of sporadic and not laid out the best way, but I'm in a hurry and wanted to get this on here. Any similar stories or ways you've handled growth spurts in the past would be helpful! Thanks and happy holidays! :D

Iwillbebetter
Posts: 484
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
Location: Minnesota

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by Iwillbebetter » Thu Dec 22, 2011 9:26 am

I'm not as far as that yet, but from reading your post I would first say, I would think all of those things helped contribute to your feelings!! Sometimes it's not one thing that sets us off but when things add up. Then it's just the "final straw" but all the things on the pile helped get you there... If that makes sense :) I would suggest maybe getting out some of the CDs and listening. The 6 steps to put a end to attacks (I think session 2) and or session 3 the positsive self talk. Not sure if the others would be helpful also. But I would start there.
I would try to not think about it to much either... thats when the thinking snowballs and you get to feeling worse and worse as the mental snowball gets bigger and bigger!!

* I can already see there will be a couple discs I will be going back to.... :) *
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."

AP2884Moss
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:59 pm

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by AP2884Moss » Thu Dec 22, 2011 4:22 pm

Thanks for the response! Yeah, you'll have to go back and re-listen to discs for sure. That's the frustrating part about it, you'll do so well for so long and then you'll hit your "growth spurt" and get a little discouraged. I went back a couple nights ago to listen to disc 14, and I've done my relaxation disc for the first time in a long time. I think the thing that helps me most is the positive self-talk, just getting it into my brain that everything is fine. I know you're not supposed to focus on your symptoms, but when you're having trouble breathing and your heart is beating fast, what do you focus on?? That's the hard part. When I step back and look at it, it doesn't make sense to me why I have anxiety because my life is good, I have a job, a place to live, make enough money, my family is healthy. But my brain doesn't listen to all that common sense :) It's not going to just be an easy fix. Like the program says, you've programmed your brain with negative thoughts your entire life, it'll take a while to reprogram it to think positively. That's the struggle we all have but it'll be worth it! Again, thanks for the response and happy holidays!

Iwillbebetter
Posts: 484
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
Location: Minnesota

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by Iwillbebetter » Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:06 am

You don't have to thank me for repsonse, it was my pleasure!! :) I'm sure it can be hard not to focus on symptoms when they are there, I think it's also the way we focus on them. Instead of I dont' know feeding it I guess.... what if I stop breathing, what if my heart gets faster and I have a heart attack.... that is just going to make it worse mentally and might make symptoms worsen. Instead ok I'm having trouble breathing, what's going on, I must be anxious about something. Or maybe turn the focus on your breathing... I have learned breath in think calm breath out think peace that might help slow the heart down.... but it's more about telling yourself you are ok. The feelings are normal. When you focus on them in a negative manner, that's when we make it worse on ourselves.... and Yes I know easier said than done, that's where the practice and patience comes in!! :) We spent how long getting here.... it's going to take a little time and work to get where we now want!! :)
Funny I think that sometimes.... really my life isn't so bad how/why do I feel this way, I use to be able to go on and on and get myself feeling pretty bad, for feeling bad... crazy how it works.... it's nice to be able to see it for what it is for a change!! :)
I think even when we get where we "want to be" we still have to work to stay there. Kind of like I was just telling my oldest when he got his report card. It was all A's & B's . I said I know you are feeling good about where you are sitting, I know it took a little work to get there, but don't get to comfortable, you still have to do the work to stay where you are. If you get to comfortable and take it for granted your grades will slip. I think it's the same here. We have to work to get where we want to go, but when we do finally get there if we get to comfortable we will just as easily slip back where we were. We have to keep at it, keep working to stay where we are when we get there....

anyway I could go on and on :) Happy Holidays to you also :)
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."

coach21
Posts: 65
Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2011 2:01 pm

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by coach21 » Sat Dec 24, 2011 11:28 am

Great post. Couldn't agree more. Alot of times individualswill finishthis program and think in terms of elimination. When they have re-established their confidence they quit doing what they did to get their. Through several growth spurts myself I found this to be true. I found that staying on the affensive is key. Creating a collaborartive program for yourself that incorporates bibliotherapy; spirituality; peer suport (check up from the neck up); these skills; self help CD's, ect.. Similair to four legs on a chair when we overcompensate on one leg the others are a tab off balance. Because we are not immune to our old ways of reacting, often times unmanaged stress will manifest into anxiety. We are human it's o.k.. But with the knowledge you have acquired you recognize when your reacting in old ways and realize your chair is "off balance". Then through these growth spurts you discover new coping skills and establish a sound continuing care program. God Bless and keep pressing forward!!!

Iwillbebetter
Posts: 484
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
Location: Minnesota

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by Iwillbebetter » Sun Dec 25, 2011 10:05 am

I am finding even in working the program, when I have my "bad days" it seems to be mostly the days that I haven't had a chance to do much of my work. When I stay active in working on myself I have more "good days" (I just had this awakening within the last day or two)
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."

Paisleegreen
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Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:27 pm

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by Paisleegreen » Mon Dec 26, 2011 10:08 pm

I agree---I do better when I work on the skills learned. Sometimes, I don't practice relaxation skills and later it affects me. Also, I have slipped a little bit on my healthy eating, with the holidays I have eaten more chocolate than I have since I first had my panic attacks and then anxiety. So I have had to go back to eating just the good foods that have kept me calm. There is so much junk food around Christmas time and I just can't eat the way I use to, my body is not a "calm" or able to handle the rush that straight sugary foods give me. Especially since I'm not getting the aerobic exercise as much as I did when the days were longer and warmer. Paislee

Iwillbebetter
Posts: 484
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 8:35 am
Location: Minnesota

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by Iwillbebetter » Wed Dec 28, 2011 8:08 am

I haven't gotten to the eating yet... but can see how that would also make a big difference. I think Excersize can also play a part. Since I've started when I do have days I miss, I can tell, I do feel a little more down than the days I am able to do it. Even if it's only stretch's I get done. Maybe part of it is just knowing that I did it :)
"Only rainbows after rain, the sun will always come again, and it's a cirlce, circling around again it comes around again...."

Kathy1365
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2006 10:05 pm

Re: Had my first real "growth spurt".. thoughts?

Post by Kathy1365 » Fri May 25, 2012 4:28 pm

I'm getting so much out of reading these posts! Thank you! I've been struggling with growth spurts too so by reading these I don't feel so alone. I've come to the conclusion that you pretty much have to live the Program--all the time. I'm trying to not pay too much attention to the symptoms (heart palpitations) and it's not easy. But I do find that when I'm relaxed, distracted, and feeling more upbeat, I don't get them, at least, not nearly as much.

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