I can relate to not wanting to write it down, but it is a technique to help desensitize you from the thoughts. As for the "images or scenrios to write" do you not have particular scary thoughts that repeat? I know I did. . . both relating to being afraid I'd go crazy and hurt myself or my kids (I'll spare you the details) and another scenario relating to going crazy and having to go to the hospital. (again sparing details. LOL)
So, Boon's suggestion would be to write it all out and let the thoughts flow on paper almost like you're writing out a story, and don't hold back. Let it get as far out there as your imagination lets you. Then, when you read that scenario over and over. . at first it will be scary and anxiety producing. After awhile it will lose its power as your mind gets sort of bored with it. This type of thing helped me in the past. . .actually for me just writing it out and reading it a couple times, made me realize how silly it was. I would never hurt myself or anyone. And, just the fact that the thought of it scares you so much is proof you won't do it. (I know you know this but) people that are 'psycho' WANT to hurt others.
Can Anyone Relate? Obsessive Thought Recovery
Hi!!
Great Thoughts on this guys.
I have the same problem. I have been through the progam before and am repeating it a third time now.
I've been struglling lately with obsessiveness.
I will be completly fine one day and let them float in and out and the next I can be all high strung, sick to my stomach, and feel like at any moment, I will lose it!
My thoughts, I've noticed have nothing to do with the content like Boon said. I NOW see I am afraid of the FEELINGS it produces and the FEELING of losing control.
Not suicide, homicide, or going completly nutzo but the loss of control feeling. THat's the BIGGIE!
Can you believe I realized this today?
I was Ok last night until I began thining, Why do I always talk about me and my feelings with my Mom and my Boyfriend? (Now for me this is my biggest hurdle- I always look to them for reassurance and am aware this needs to change in order to get through this on my own). THen I began obsessing about that, which then led to other obsessions which then led to me feeling SO anxious!
Well i ended up realizing it and going ot bed but guess what thought was there when I woke up?
"why?"
"why do I do this?"
What's wrong with me?"
"DO I need to go to a mental institutuion?"
"I hate that I ask Michael and my Mom ALL the time for reassurance."
"WHY, WHY, WHY?"
That was enough to make you want to scream. My mind was freaking out a million miles a minute!!!
I got to work and finally calmed myself down.
So here I am, felling a bit "off" still but you guys, I am SO DETERMINED to really get over this, this time.
I mean really face it ALL head on, FLOAT with the scary thoughts and feelings and see that I can handle them and live. This I think IS the only way out.
Like Boon said, the only way out is through!
Wish me luck and to all of you as well!!
We are SO STRONG and will not act on these silly thoughts...
I have to share some that I had last night,
"what if I scream right here in the restaruant?"
"what's wrong with me?"
"Why am I still doing this?"
"what if I killed myself?"-(thats my biggieand boy does it scare me!)
"what if I freak out and never come back?"
"what if I bit Michael?"- That one is funny...
gotta love anxiety huh?
Take care all,
Lisa
Great Thoughts on this guys.
I have the same problem. I have been through the progam before and am repeating it a third time now.
I've been struglling lately with obsessiveness.
I will be completly fine one day and let them float in and out and the next I can be all high strung, sick to my stomach, and feel like at any moment, I will lose it!
My thoughts, I've noticed have nothing to do with the content like Boon said. I NOW see I am afraid of the FEELINGS it produces and the FEELING of losing control.
Not suicide, homicide, or going completly nutzo but the loss of control feeling. THat's the BIGGIE!
Can you believe I realized this today?
I was Ok last night until I began thining, Why do I always talk about me and my feelings with my Mom and my Boyfriend? (Now for me this is my biggest hurdle- I always look to them for reassurance and am aware this needs to change in order to get through this on my own). THen I began obsessing about that, which then led to other obsessions which then led to me feeling SO anxious!
Well i ended up realizing it and going ot bed but guess what thought was there when I woke up?
"why?"
"why do I do this?"
What's wrong with me?"
"DO I need to go to a mental institutuion?"
"I hate that I ask Michael and my Mom ALL the time for reassurance."
"WHY, WHY, WHY?"
That was enough to make you want to scream. My mind was freaking out a million miles a minute!!!
I got to work and finally calmed myself down.
So here I am, felling a bit "off" still but you guys, I am SO DETERMINED to really get over this, this time.
I mean really face it ALL head on, FLOAT with the scary thoughts and feelings and see that I can handle them and live. This I think IS the only way out.
Like Boon said, the only way out is through!
Wish me luck and to all of you as well!!
We are SO STRONG and will not act on these silly thoughts...
I have to share some that I had last night,
"what if I scream right here in the restaruant?"
"what's wrong with me?"
"Why am I still doing this?"
"what if I killed myself?"-(thats my biggieand boy does it scare me!)
"what if I freak out and never come back?"
"what if I bit Michael?"- That one is funny...
gotta love anxiety huh?
Take care all,
Lisa
[COLOR:PINK]|||Progress... Not Perfection|||[/COLOR]
-
Guest
Lisa,
I hear your pain and have felt your pain. The pure "o" ers have so much in common. We have formed a little informal group here on the site. We send out messages every day so that we can share and relate to other Pure "o" ers. If you care to join the little group you are more then welcome.
Just PM me and I will add you to the group.
Zoe
I hear your pain and have felt your pain. The pure "o" ers have so much in common. We have formed a little informal group here on the site. We send out messages every day so that we can share and relate to other Pure "o" ers. If you care to join the little group you are more then welcome.
Just PM me and I will add you to the group.
Zoe
-
Guest
My coach made this suggestion but I'm not sure how to put it into play:
I haven't been diagnosed with 'pure o' but I have a strong feeling that is a good label for me.
Because, on one hand I know I'm self-centered, but on the other hand. . . we're told to watch our thoughts to try to work through them. So, I'm trying to 'figure that out' which is hard for me.Please limit the time you spend on thinking about "you" each day. Such as, how you feel, how you are, how you are anxious, how you are sad, how people treat you. When you find that you are dwelling on you, switch that to how your kids feel, how your family is doing, how you can do something for someone else, how can you make others happy, how you can improve your relationship, work, faith, health.
I haven't been diagnosed with 'pure o' but I have a strong feeling that is a good label for me.
-
Guest
Chris,
Watching your thoughts is not the same as ruminating about them. When thoughts come in just allow them to pass through with no attachment to them. No emotional attachment and no inner conversation back and forth. When you find yourself ruminating about "you" bring your attention to something outside of yourself (as your coach suggested). When watching your thoughts without attachment is what needs to be done then that is what you do. When bringing your attention to something outside of yourself is warranted then that is what you need to do. You will know in any given moment which is necessary at the time. Don't bring tension into this exercise just "flow with it". Bringing tension to this exercise will keep you from doing it at all because you will be afraid of doing it wrong. There is no wrong. Being present will guide you. What feels right to do will also guide you.
Lisa:
You never answer a WHAT IF question. Never. Your scare voice does not have a crystal ball. It does not have the answers. When the "what if's" start just practice bringing your attention to your breath and say to yourself, I don't answer what if questions. Always return to your breath. You're creating a new habit when you do this.
Another tool when you are ready to apply it is to simply say: WHATEVER. What if I bite Michael (love it)- Whatever. What if I scream in the restaurant - Whatever. What if I kill myself - whatever. What if I kill Michael - whatever. It takes trust, I know, to use this technique, but the more you treat your scare voice like "chicken little" the sooner it will leave you. And remember to feel the discomfort when applying this exercise becauses there will be resistance to it. Breathe into the feelings and tell yourself that it is OK to feel this discomfort. You are doing a new exercise and it's uncomfortable right now. These feelings are temporary and will pass soon.
Watching your thoughts is not the same as ruminating about them. When thoughts come in just allow them to pass through with no attachment to them. No emotional attachment and no inner conversation back and forth. When you find yourself ruminating about "you" bring your attention to something outside of yourself (as your coach suggested). When watching your thoughts without attachment is what needs to be done then that is what you do. When bringing your attention to something outside of yourself is warranted then that is what you need to do. You will know in any given moment which is necessary at the time. Don't bring tension into this exercise just "flow with it". Bringing tension to this exercise will keep you from doing it at all because you will be afraid of doing it wrong. There is no wrong. Being present will guide you. What feels right to do will also guide you.
Lisa:
You never answer a WHAT IF question. Never. Your scare voice does not have a crystal ball. It does not have the answers. When the "what if's" start just practice bringing your attention to your breath and say to yourself, I don't answer what if questions. Always return to your breath. You're creating a new habit when you do this.
Another tool when you are ready to apply it is to simply say: WHATEVER. What if I bite Michael (love it)- Whatever. What if I scream in the restaurant - Whatever. What if I kill myself - whatever. What if I kill Michael - whatever. It takes trust, I know, to use this technique, but the more you treat your scare voice like "chicken little" the sooner it will leave you. And remember to feel the discomfort when applying this exercise becauses there will be resistance to it. Breathe into the feelings and tell yourself that it is OK to feel this discomfort. You are doing a new exercise and it's uncomfortable right now. These feelings are temporary and will pass soon.
-
Guest
-
Guest
Boon!!!
How was your Alaska adventure???
I always love your advice. You know I KNOW what I need to do, HOWEVER, when I am in "it" Obsessing, I don't do what I am supposed to.
So even if it means I go around all day saying "whatever", that's ok?
I can't believe I am hitting a growth spurt like this. I don't know if it's because I am redoing the program again and it's all sort of there, journaling, listening to the cd's and workbook and stuff, but whew, I thought I was done with this.
I do feel like I took a fe steps back in one way yet, in another way I KNOW how far I've come and I know I've struggled with anxiety since I was little.It may take some time for me to break this.
=) I can still smile at myself though!!!!=)
There is one good thing, I don't seem to get depressed, just EXTEREMELY anxious!!!
Funny part- Michael and I were driving home and I asked him, what did you say to me this morning again?
and he said, "Oh I was just imitating what you sounded like in the morning at 6! You sounded like Barry White when you rolled over and said, "I will go to the gym after work not now!".
He used a very DEEP voice. I was laughing and then thought, "Huh everytime I get a scarey thought, I should give my voice a tone like Barry White. It would go something like this.
" Uh Huh Baby.. What if you killed yourself or someone else!"
(VERY DEEP VOICE)
ANyways, I am slap happy, it's been a lonnnnnnnggg week...
Overall I know I am doing beter today. I know I'm improving, I have went through many hardhsips, lost many friends and family this year including my wonderful Grandfather.
With all of that, Ihave come through and if I am still dealing with some scary thoughts- then so be it. I also have moved jobs and I am happy here where at my old one I wasn't.
Take care and HUGS to all of you!!
Lisa
How was your Alaska adventure???
I always love your advice. You know I KNOW what I need to do, HOWEVER, when I am in "it" Obsessing, I don't do what I am supposed to.
So even if it means I go around all day saying "whatever", that's ok?
I can't believe I am hitting a growth spurt like this. I don't know if it's because I am redoing the program again and it's all sort of there, journaling, listening to the cd's and workbook and stuff, but whew, I thought I was done with this.
I do feel like I took a fe steps back in one way yet, in another way I KNOW how far I've come and I know I've struggled with anxiety since I was little.It may take some time for me to break this.
=) I can still smile at myself though!!!!=)
There is one good thing, I don't seem to get depressed, just EXTEREMELY anxious!!!
Funny part- Michael and I were driving home and I asked him, what did you say to me this morning again?
and he said, "Oh I was just imitating what you sounded like in the morning at 6! You sounded like Barry White when you rolled over and said, "I will go to the gym after work not now!".
He used a very DEEP voice. I was laughing and then thought, "Huh everytime I get a scarey thought, I should give my voice a tone like Barry White. It would go something like this.
" Uh Huh Baby.. What if you killed yourself or someone else!"
(VERY DEEP VOICE)
ANyways, I am slap happy, it's been a lonnnnnnnggg week...
Overall I know I am doing beter today. I know I'm improving, I have went through many hardhsips, lost many friends and family this year including my wonderful Grandfather.
With all of that, Ihave come through and if I am still dealing with some scary thoughts- then so be it. I also have moved jobs and I am happy here where at my old one I wasn't.
Take care and HUGS to all of you!!
Lisa
-
Guest
Lisa. . . I have some stuff printed out and bookmarked so when I'm "in it" and I can't think clearly I can read my reminders of how I'm "supposed" to think. Sometimes it helps.
Or I'll tell myself: "my thoughts are a little weird right now because of adrenaline . . if I calm down they will be more normal in a little bit, so ignore them for now"
Or I'll tell myself: "my thoughts are a little weird right now because of adrenaline . . if I calm down they will be more normal in a little bit, so ignore them for now"