Moving to another State...leaving My childhood home.

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creamcheesepuff
Posts: 87
Joined: Mon Apr 19, 2010 9:37 pm

Post by creamcheesepuff » Fri Sep 24, 2010 7:27 pm

Dwelling on the bad things has been with me forever it seems. REtraining my mind from childhood fears and depressing situations is never easy... I am swirling into this sinkhole of depression and anxiety again...I am afraid to leave my home, I have to , my brother is selling it....I have this unnatural attachment like a security blanket that is dangerous to my mind, it makes me physically sick....has anyone ever had this situation and how did you deal with it.???

creamcheesepuff
Posts: 87
Joined: Mon Apr 19, 2010 9:37 pm

Post by creamcheesepuff » Sun Sep 26, 2010 2:05 pm

If anyone ever experienced living in their childhood home again after so many years and having difficulty disembarking from it please let me know how you did this....I am having such a difficult time with this.????

creamcheesepuff
Posts: 87
Joined: Mon Apr 19, 2010 9:37 pm

Post by creamcheesepuff » Wed Sep 29, 2010 6:42 pm

I wish someone could relate to my situation....someone.....very hard to do this moving to another state.

megs mom
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Oct 04, 2010 8:11 pm

Post by megs mom » Sat Oct 09, 2010 8:15 am

I can sort of relate to your situation, although It was not my childhood home (I have been married 15 years). We just moved away from all of my family. Really not too far about 15 min. but for me it seems really far away. It was a choice we made to better our lives and have a home of our own. I am really having a hard time with this desision. I just tell myself it is only anxiety and everthing will be ok and I know that my family is just a phone call away!

THH
Posts: 860
Joined: Mon May 10, 2010 10:53 am

Post by THH » Tue Oct 12, 2010 3:29 pm

Creamcheesepuff,
I'm sorry I did not see this post till today. I'm kinda hit and miss on here.

I grew up in my grandmas farm house. I moved away for 11 year out of state. When I returned home, I was really home sick and my grandma had passed. My uncle was living there, and I found out he had basically lost her house to forecloser. He had spent money like a drunkin sailor. Her house was paid for. years ago. I had a full scale range of emotions. Sadness was one that took the longest to get over. (anger too)
Change. Life changes and we always don't like to change. We want to hold on to what we know, even if its good or bad.
I'm not sure why you have to move, but if its a done deal, you do have to move on. Maybe your new place will be very nice and you may enjoy the new area. Try to dwell on some positive things, I'm sure you can find a few to focus on. Dwelling on the past leads nowhere. I hope there is something in here that will help you. My best to you... :)
Maybe this move will prove to be the best change for you yet?

cream cheese
Posts: 104
Joined: Tue May 22, 2007 6:33 pm

Post by cream cheese » Tue Oct 19, 2010 5:15 pm

THH, I have been trying to email you through the stresscenter and through your private email but was having a problem....frustrating these machines!!! Thank you so much for answering my post. I am so happy someone was out there reading it!!!! I am 54, divorced for some time, no kids, have one best friend who I will be leaving behind here in NJ. Its very very tough. I feel disconnected at times, like I am zoning out. So strange to be attached to wood, concrete and vinyl siding!!!LOL MY Childhood home!!! Hope you see this email soon...My move in date is Nov. 17th.....I am sulking, and crying everyday here....cant block it out but have to move on with my life...there is nothing here but my best friend who I am trying to convince to come and move up there with me. I wish he would change his stubborn mind. Sandra creamcheesepuff

Paisleegreen
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Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:27 pm

Post by Paisleegreen » Thu Nov 11, 2010 9:35 am

I can understand completely! That is my difficulty is that I feel these things so deeply. First off, I went by my childhood home last spring in another state. They had changed the LR large pane window to one more energy efficient. So that meant it cut up a nice big "picture" window into some windows that could open and let the breeze come through. As well as "mirror" coating so that it reflects and you can't see in.

They did this to my old bedroom window as well, made it smaller and more in a tri-pane configuration. Then I noticed they put pavers in where there was lawn, which I understand that as well. Helps to make a driveway/pathway to the door. Anyway, in the past the previous owners who bought the house from my Dad would let me in to see the changes, not so with the new owners who didn't speak English very well and had just moved in and was leaving at the moment.

I left when they did, but returned and took a picture. It just wasn't the same, so it saddened me a bit. But then the whole city, county, state wasn't the same so it was hard and gave me some anxiety.

The other thing is that my parents moved to be near me in a house I had picked out for myself one day after touring it and knew that there was no way I could ever afford that house to live there, but passed on the info to my parents when I knew they were going to move to be near me. While in that house, I did feel that I would be a part of it someday, somehow.

Well, they saw the house and bought and lived there for over 11 years and unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, we did move into the house for about 10 months after the house we rented went up in rent and my husband had lost his job. So there are many memories in that house as well, with my children, parents and relatives that visited.

So guess who got to clear out that house when my parents died. Moi! I have a lot of their stuff now at my house, I didn't have time to peruse the house at my leisure as I had wanted when my mother had passed and my eldest sister was visiting to go "through" their stuff and give it away. She's the organized one.
Even had an argument or discussion over that issue.

She had no ties to this house, but I did. Well, the house sold and once my Dad had moved out, I had to clear it out for the new buyers to close the "deal". A lot of pressure on me and my family to "clear it out". It was awful.

But I have some of their stuff at my house and its causing issues, along with other stuff that due to my losses is causing issues. So I completely commiserate with you while you are leaving your family home.

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