Who Am I?
Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:44 am
I am beginning to see how my justified beliefs maintain my anxiety and depression. I see how I've used others to not only criticize, but to use in contempt of my own irrational justification. It's easier to do rather than take a hard look and challenge what I believe. This is reacting. This is blame. I'm able to see how through this defensive behavior, my negative habits need justification from others. I need validation from others to know who I am, to know my place. I've become complacent because I'm so used to just accepting others viewpoints. I don't know my own! I know I don't always have to care, but I don't have to accept others opinions because I don't care.
I'm confused as to who I am and have become over the past few years. What are my goals, even just short term? Who am I? I'm used to people telling me. It's easier than deciding for myself. This awareness is, of course, overwhelming but I'm allowing it. Letting it in. I'm trying not to obsess about all the past decisions I can now see I made from fear. Because of the Program, I can stay in my present moment and only move forward. Practice makes proficiency. This Session really forces you to look in the mirror, I'm trying not to be too hard on the person I see.
I'm confused as to who I am and have become over the past few years. What are my goals, even just short term? Who am I? I'm used to people telling me. It's easier than deciding for myself. This awareness is, of course, overwhelming but I'm allowing it. Letting it in. I'm trying not to obsess about all the past decisions I can now see I made from fear. Because of the Program, I can stay in my present moment and only move forward. Practice makes proficiency. This Session really forces you to look in the mirror, I'm trying not to be too hard on the person I see.