Stress Center Peer Support

I'm new and just started the attacking anxiety program. I'm currently in my 2nd week. I've only told a very select group of people about my anxiety because I want them to be aware of not only the fact that I have anxiety, but also understand the steps I'm taking to conquer it. My question: I am debating telling my boss and co-workers. They have noticed a change in my behavior over the last couple of months and recently reached out to me asking if everything was OK and if there was anything they could do. My family supports me telling them. I feel like a weight will be lifted if I tell them but I'm also afraid they will see me as weak or fire me.... although I think the firing part is more of an obsessive scary thought than reality.

Any advice would be much appreciated.

I know many may disagree with me, but I haven't found it such a terrific idea to share my issues with everyone. It feels to me as though they scutinize everything I do! Every mis-step, no matter how small, they blame on my problems with anxiety. I don't need that negative thinking.

I did tell my husband and closest friends with great results, but some others were not so supportive. I understand that, unless they've felt as I do, they can't understand. I now just say, when I have "off" days, that I don't feel particulary well. It's true, but not overly specific.

But I do think you should do what you are comfortable with, as I don't fully know your personal position. I believe that anxiety and depression are as real as any illness, but I've personally found that some folks just see it as something we need to "get over". And I don't need or want to deal with them.

Good luck, and have a wonderful day!

Good morning starr.... I too am new to the program. This is actually my first day. I also debated tellimg my boss about my depression and anxiety. I grew up being told that you don't tell people your business. Personal stuff stays at home. As an adult, I don't believe that at all. I think holding everything in is unhealthy. I think you should tell your boss about your anxiety. He or she may be able to help when they see you getting upset. I told my boss and he is great. He knows that when I get depressed I seclude myself from the world. So, if I call in sick he calls me several times throughout the day to make sure I am ok and not "faking an illness" so I can hibernate in my room. You don't have to go into detail, but let people know so that they can better understand you. If you snap at someone they might not take it as personal. Anyway, hang in there. Lillie

I had to tell my boss because I was supposed to go take notes at a meeting they didn't tell me about till 30 minutes prior and it sent me into a level 10 attack! I was feeling anxious already that morning for no reason and that did it. I even took a xanax but it didn't seem to help. Anyhow they were cool about it and the following month let me know it was okay if I couldn't do it. I just needed more than few minutes notice!
I think it's healthly to talk about it. For one you might help someone else and why should you be quiet about it? It's nothing to be ashamed of.

Other than my docs, I have told only 2 people. My dad and my husband. I also am afraid of sharing my story. However, before I knew I had anxiety/panic and understood that this was why I had problems in my life, I was constantly talking about my problems. Some people were very understanding and helpful and some people would stop interacting with me.

I think my troubles are too big and although some people are very caring, others just don't know what to say to help me, so they tend to create distance between me and them. Now that I understand my anxiety/panic, I understand why some people keep a distance from me. I often wonder if I explained my anxiety/panic to the people I trust, if it would make them more fearful of me or more understanding.

I would really like to talk to my closest friends, but I'm afraid that THEY may worry that they might have to call an ambulance or something if I have an attack. Or they may think I might have a nervous break down in their presence or something and they wouldn't know what to do. And I'm REALLY worried that they may be concerned leaving their children with me for a play day with my daughter. People may be afraid that I have some sort of serious psychiatric condition just because they don't really understand the anxiety disease and I do not have any psychiatric imbalance (manic depression or paranoid schizophrenia or anything of the like). Not that I have negative opinions of people that do have these unfortunate circumstances. But, none of these types of episodes ever happens with me. I'm just afraid that people just won't understand it and may become afraid. And this shows one of my grand fears that stems from my anxiety!

I've decided to explain to people (only if they ask) that I have a hormone imbalance that my nutritionist is helping me straighten out. And this is true for me. Everyone is very supportive and understanding about that. I guess since it sounds less from the world of "mental disease", it makes it easier for people to understand. Don't know if I'm right to do this or not, but it works for me - for now anyways.

I have only told very few people at work. People I consider friends. I've never mentioned it to my boss, just because I'm not close to him and my anxiety/depression does not seem to affect my ability to get my job done. One friend is very supportive, but seems to be always on the look-out for a sign that I'm having problems. That's good, I guess, to have a friend to turn to. But she also misinterprets a busy, hectic hello for one that means I'm have a "bad" day. So, my advice would be to tell a friend at work first before you go to your boss. See how it feels to talk to you friend. Get his/her advice about whether you should mention it to your boss. Good luck whatever you decide.

I left a job of 8 years to start a new one last March. One of my interview questions was did I mind traveling, which of course I do! I hate flying or driving long distances so I said yes, I do mind traveling and explained my situation. I said I had anxiety and that I am working on fixing it. And two weeks later I was called and told I got the job. I'm still there and love it. I made a lot of friends and I told them all I have anxiety and guess what, no one cares. Everyone has a problem, whether it be drugs, alcohol, depression, money whatever... don't be ashamed. Also, they can't fire you for having anxiety. I'm sure if they are reaching out to you, they care about you, and won't judge your problem. Good luck in whatever you decide.

A funny thing happened at my job a couple weeks back. I know some people know something's going on with me at my job. You can't "fake" how you feel 8 hours a day and sometimes your anxiety slips out within those hours. So, about 3 or 4 people came in my section and started talking about their issues with anxiety, past and present. I was just sitting there listening and debating whether I should confess my issues. I didn't. I have that same belief that you have Granbury... you don't talk about personal stuff like that at work. I've always been taught that people at work aren't your friends because in the end it all comes down to the money and they'll do what they have to do to keep their jobs. But anyway... I know they were trying to get me to open up about my anxiety issues because they noticed them. It felt like I was having an intervention LOL or something. But I felt very uncomfortable about it so I shut down because I didn't trust telling them. That's just my personal experience, but you do what God is leading you to do. You're job experience might be totally different than mine. There's also some other issues of why I didn't feel comfortable opening up to these individuals that I don't wish to discuss. But once again, you do what your heart and God is leading you to do because your situation might be totally different from mine.

Hey. I used to be so scared of telling people about my anxiety because I was afraid of what they would think of me that they would think I am weird or crazy, but I just got to the point where I really don't care what people think of me anymore with my anxiety. I have actually found out, in telling more and more people that I find more and more people that I KNOW who have the same problem, and I end up having people to talk to about it. I found out several of my sisters friends have bad anxiety and even my sister does! Which I didn't know. No one treated me different and people were open to talking about it. I heard a lot of people say, "Everyone has their own thing or own problems". One of my sisters friends even introduced me to this program, because she went through it. And she is someone you would never think has had panic at all or ever had the problem. She acts in city theatre and won singing competitions and is just a really beatufiul talented woman. I don't think it's as big of an issue as WE make it out to be because anxiety and depression really are so common these days. I told my boss and co-workers the first day so they knew. My boss wanted to drive with me across town, well I can't do that, so I just ended up telling him. I think if you feel it's a good idea to tell them then do it. There is nothing wrong with sharing personal information with people you are with almost everyday of the week for hours a day. If they are concerned they obviously care. But like abundant living said, there are different work environments and situations and it might not be the best thing for every situation, but only you can tell if it is or isn't. Personally I feel it's a good idea to be open about it, there is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. So do what you feel is right. Good luck!

wow, thank you all so much!

Lots of different perspectives and it gives me much to think about. I've decided that the window for me to tell my boss will be tomorrow, so it's kind of like now or never. I really appreciate all of the feedback - I'll let you know how it goes!