Please read my story and tell me what you think???

angela52884 · Post by **angela52884** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:02 am

Hi everyone. I just wanted to post a story and get opinions on what is wrong with me????? 1st, I remember worrying about things as a child such as getting a disease or something being wrong with me. I remember that I would always get sweaty hands and my mom would say it was just hormones. I woke up when I was 12 and was hyperventalating and my mom took me to the ER, I was pretty much fine by the time I got there. My family moved alot when I was in high school, probably like 8 different times. My junior and senior year I missed alot of school!!! I just woke up and felt nervous and scared and I just didnt want to go. To this day, I have no clue why I had those feelings. Sometimes before bed I would dry heave, but not actually get sick. I remember a few times I just didnt feel right in my mind, and my mom would ask me if I wanted to go the the ER, which I didn't. I have had panic attacks before, or got the panicky feelings which I hate!!! I just feel like Im not normal. Now I feel like I am afraid to do anything!!!! I am pregnant also and worried about everything about it, will I get high blood pressure, will I have any complications?? I have a 3 year old son and had a great pregnancy with him. I dont know why I feel this way now??? Even when I go to the doctors I feel really anxious and panicky and I always have a really high heart rate when I am there. I walk outside and everything just looks funny and it scares me!!! I drove to kroger last night to get stuff for dinner and when I got there I felt like I couldnt even go into the store!! I was scared and just felt funny!! Someone please help me this is not me!!! I just want to cry! I just want to be normal!!!! My fiance and I just bought a house a couple months ago, and I am not working right now, my car is broke and needs fixed but we dont have the money right now to fix it. I am pretty much stuck at home everyday until my fiance gets here. Most of my days are spent on the computer looking up anxiety symptoms trying to figure out what the heck is wrong with me!!! I just want to feel better and right now I feel totally out of control!!!!!!! Thanks is you made it through this long post!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:10 am

angela - I think you sound pretty normal to me, for someone who is dealing with anxiety and panick. I think most of us have had the same type of story that you have. For me, I later was able to realize that my breathing was what was giving me the light headed funny feeling. My wife will always catch me when she hears me doing the shallow breathing. We have to work through this program, and overcome our problems. If your first pregnancy was fine this one should be to, just don't overthink the situation, enjoy the moment, and everything in it. Good Luck with all you do.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:33 am

thank you!! its really hard, I just wish these feelings would go away!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 3:56 am

Hi angela!!
To have anxiety is normal, everyone have this. But when it's effecting our lives and takes a lot of time to deal with it we must tried to do something about it. I don't know if you are doing the programme, because we have to learn skills to handle with the anxiety. It's very important that we are nice and treat ourselves good.I just started over with the programme and it helped me a lot when I was doing the programme the last time. I wish you soon feel better. Hugs from Moa!!

Craw · Post by **Craw** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 4:07 am

Angela -
I totally understand you. When I was younger, I used to get asthma attacks - yet that wasn't what they were - they were anxiety attacks. So when they'd put me on the asthma meds, I'd end up in the hosiptal overdosed. I would wake in the middle of the night and be afraid of dying or not being successful or not being someone.
When I was pregnant, I too read all the books and worried about everything. I am inbetween jobs so I have a lot of time on my hands to overthink everything right now too and is why I started the program. Do you have the tapes? You're not crazy and neither am I. We just need to learn how to help ourselves out of this dark hole that anxiety pushed us into.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 4:11 am

Thanks so much for all your responses. Do you feel nervous all day long though?? I just feel like something is wrong all day long and I dont know what it is!!!!!! Maybe it is because I dont work and I have way too much time to sit and think about stuff!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 4:53 am

Hi Angela. What you're feeling is very common. So many people on here feels like you do, we can relate to what you're going through. Are you doing the program? You need to have the tools from the program to deal with this. Try to relax a d do some slow deep breathing. You will be fine. Try to find something relaxing that youblike and do that. Take care of yourself Angela.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 5:17 am

Hi again angela!! Yes I feel exactly the same way you do so I perfectly understand you. I'm nervous from the moment I woke up in the morning until I go to bed. It usually feels a little bit better in the evening but as far as I go to bed and try to sleep my thought's started. I maybe sleep an hour then I woke up and I wish I had a stop button in my brain. I lay there and think that I haven't done a good job at work, I'm not a good mother, my boyfriend will soon leave me because I can't feel good about myself and so on. I worried about the next day if I can't sleep I'm so tired and as my job as a nurse I must be focused and concentreated. I will go through the programme again because in this way I feel very bad. Moa!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 5:34 am

Hello Angela. I was recently hospitalized with my mood disorders. While in there a therapist came up with what I think is a great idea. When you are not feeling anxious put on slips of paper activities that you like to do or that may possibly distract you and place them in a container. Ideas might include taking a warm bath or shower, taking a walk with your son, coloring a mandala (there are free ones to be printed on the Internet), listening to soothing music. The main thing is to think of things that you think may possibly distract you. Then when you are feeling anxious, draw one of the slips of paper from the container and make the cmmitment to do it even though you may not want to. I think half the fun comes from not knowing ahead of time what you pull out. It's worth a try anyway. Hope you feel better today.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 6:32 am

hey Angela, i read your post and what has helped me is being busy to take your mind off of yourself i have been going through this stuff for 3 years and still have times where i forget i have this disoorder i have yo get grounded and work wiyh the tools given in the program and the part about things looking funny and feeling funny thats when i know my anxiety is acting up again hang in there like my granpa told me nothing lasts for ever god bless