Stress Center Peer Support

I'm experiencing some of this. In the program it is suggested to take opportunities to face your challenges but not to give yourself too much advance notice. Well I have some things in June that I have to do, one a dental appointment and one Jury Duty, that are mandatory. Both my fear is more based on overactive bladder and ibs than having an actual panic attack, which I know I can deal with now that I have the tools, but not the former.

So how do you deal with the anticipatory feelings when you know you have to do something anxiety producing way ahead of time?

My issues are mostly feeling confined, which is not an everyday occurrence - do you have any ideas for me with this. I'd like to take some practice opportunities so I could be more comfortable with these upcoming events, but not sure how without having to have an appointment that just causes the anticipatory anxiety ball rolling.

Shifrah,
I always recommend doing a best case scenerio for each thing you are going to be doing. Write it for twenty minutes on each topic and then read it daily for 45 minutes. No matter how tired or how bored you get - read it daily.

The other thing is that you and your dentist can have a signal thing going on before he/she actually begins the work. You can let him know about your ibs and that it may be necessary for you to use the bathroom. Raise one hand slightly or whatever you two decide the cue will be. With jury duty you will need to explain to someone of the ibs. They will either excuse you from jury duty (hip hip hooray) or they will accommodate you. Speak up. Don't be afraid to say you have special needs.

The anticipatory anxiety? FEEL IT. Don't run. Breathe into it and do whatever you have to do inspite of it. One day you will find that anticipatory anxiety is at a minimal and often goes away completely in many circumstances.

Boon, wow thanks so much for that!

I will definitely write those ideas down and read them daily. That's a great idea.

I did speak with the dentist's office about my overactive bladder, it's a new dentist and they said the bathroom is actually in the examination room and it's no big deal if I tell them I have to go. The initial consultation is 1 1/2 hours, yikes, part of it is in her office and the other part in the chair.

I thought about bringing that up for jury duty. I don't have a doctor and imagine if I did try to contact a doctor to get a note they'd want to run a million tests on me only to find out nothing is wrong and I just have an overactive bladder when I'm anxious. I guess my only worry would be having to explain this in front of a room full of people but I'll just have to bite the bullet on that one and do it.

I really appreciate your feedback, Boon. And would love to see any more ideas and strategies as well, so hope to get more responses!

Shifrah...I found what helped me a lot with my "anticipatory anxiety" was imagining myself being at the feared place, and feeling soooo peaceful, calm and relaxed...

I would practice this one for a couple of days before going to the "feared place!"

Boon also gave you some excellent advice on how to deal with the IBS and urinary problem!!!

Love Ya Bunches...God Bless

Hi you two - I am revisiting this thread as I had some more anticipatory anxiety. I have my dental appointment this week and J.D. later on this month and was discussing with a friend and the stress about it started to come on.

I wrote on the topics as suggested by Boon and it felt better just to write it. Also I started to listen to the relaxation cd as Ms. T suggested. I really want to conquer these issues - I know my diet has a lot to do with the physical symptoms, my emotional symptoms just need practice of the techniques which I have.

I'd be open to any other suggestions - I plan to read my lists and keep listening to the cd, but if there's anything to add, I'd be game and maybe others here can also benefit.

Shifrah...I bet the actual jury duty thing will not be nearly as bad as you have it "imagined" to be...In fact, I bet it will go extremely well!!!

You are probably thinking...That is easy for her to say, because she is not the one who will be going through it...

I have learned through experience, that nothing is ever as bad as it seems!!!

You will be fine...Shifrah...Place some calming music over your ears, and imagine yourself at these 2 appointments feeling great!!!

Imagine your self laughing and having a grand ole time...imagine yourself walking in there full of confidence!!!

You will find out that what you are making a big deal out of here, won't be that big of a deal once you face those fears of your head-on!!!

I can remember having lots of "anticipatory" anxiety about going to the dentist...Actually worse, than anticipatory...I was scared out of my mind...

I did all the positive affirmations, and imagined myself going in there calm, relaxed, and secure...

And, of course I prayed before the dreaded event!!!

I went in that dentist's office, and God knows that I was full of peace!!! It wasn't nothing like I had it dreamed up to be...

In fact, it was a very pleasant experience, and that is really saying something from someone who has always been terrified of a dentist..Period...

You will be fine...I know you can do this...Say...It is no big deal...

Say...I am the one scaring my own self, and really allow this one to soak in like a sponge!!!

Just knowing that I was scaring my own self helped me more than anything else, besides prayer!!!

You are scaring your own self Shifrah...You are going to be fine...I promise you that one!!!

I will be praying for you!!! Sissy...

Sometimes I've had success with doing a "what if" sort of thing - imagine the worst possible things that could happen. Usually those things start sounding so ridiculous that I'm able to laugh about it - and that relieves the anxiety.

Just found this thread, and those are great suggestions! I will definitely use the best-case scenario system to prep for my major dentist appointment on June 26th.

They say that our bodies (and brains) are very obedient... our expectations and beliefs can shape what happens.

I am also going to try to write the events out and senarios and read them. That seems like a good idea. My anxiety often surrounds trips. I also do not like to feel confined and feel most comfortable if I am driving myself in my own car so that I can run if need be. Now that I have a family to travel with it does not make sense for me to take my own car (although I have done it in the past) When the trip is planned for months down the road it is hard not to obsess about it and scare myself. Any other suggestions?

AP,

I actually love to plan trips... just not go on them!

Could you plan for things you want to do or places you want to see and focus on them? Is there anything you could reward yourself with on the trip, like a massage (not my favorite, but many like them) or the fact that you don't have to do any work/cooking/whichever chore you will enjoy getting out of (for me, it would be cleaning the litter box...)?

I would also get myself a couple of books or magazines I really look forward to reading at night, or maybe a couple of music CDs to play in the car or over headphones. Music helps me enormously in the car when I feel uncomfortable driving - especially singing out loud, because that forces you to breathe properly and releases emotion.