Stress Center Peer Support

I think i know why i am scared of everything. I don't even know who i am anymore, i don't know what i want in life and i am afraid to do anything or go outside be around people or places.. I dislike myself alot because i have low self-esteem and always think of myself lower than others. I don't really know what to do to actually like myself or trust myself with anything since i always seem to mess things up. I don't really know how to help myself but to read the program or other books on this i just feel like i wish i could stop the anxiety and fix everything fast. Because i dont even know how to help myself and not just this probelm i have there could be other problems i don't even realize with myself so im kind of Lost.

xlostgirlx,
It doesn't matter why you are scared; it matters that you don't let it run your life. After hearing how your parents treat you, I can only believe they taught you negative thinking. It seems like all they know.

You might not always mess things up. You may be expecting too much from yourself or listening to someone who is not on your side.

I'm sorry to tell you that you can't fix everything fast. There is no magic wand or pill that you can take and instantly feel better. What I can tell you is that if you get these books (I have both and will send them to you for nothing if you would like), there are exercises for you to do to watch how you think and change the negatives to positives, and for you, the breathing exercises will help a great deal.

Just so you don't feel so alone, remember that every single person on these forums is here for more or less the same reason you are. I can identify with the lack of support, with the overwhelming anxiety, and the low self-esteem. If you can focus on that we're all here like you, you might be able to take baby steps toward feeling better.

Also, if you find a person who you connect with, you can send them a private message. Click "go" in the top left of your screen, and click "buddies" and add a username. Then you can send a message just to that person.

Hope this helps. It hurts to think of you in such pain. Time to be your own best friend. Would you treat a friend like you treat yourself? Would you talk to a friend like you talk to yourself? Think about it, and write things down. You'll learn things that surprise you. Good luck, and try to hang in there.
Les

xlostgirlx
wow, u really seem to be crying out for help.. im sorry to hear u feel alone. and feel like everything u do is a failure.. u have to stop beating urself up..
u did one good thing and u should be proud of.. ur on here asking for help! there are hotlines u can call. ur not alone with low self esteem, lack of confidence. i am as well. i refuse to believe that now tho.
i have alot going for me. and i know god has a great plan for me, and for u as well. i noticed a change when i prayed to god, and asked him to show me some guidance to over come fear, come to think of it. i always prayed for patience, cause i always lose my cool if i dont like something, come to find out.. i need patience to over come this condition. weird, i think not... he doesnt just give u what u ask, he gives u the opportunity to make it happen.

whats ur day to day like once u wake up?
do u eat breakfast, go for a walk? do u have pets? u need to stop letting others dictate how u feel. u have to believe in urself..and i know its hard for u at the moment, but right it down. easier said than done, but writing, u can release it off. ONLY FOCUS ON THE GOOD.. the good qualities about u, what u like to eat, movies u like.. etc...DO NOT WRITE BAD THINGS, WHAT SO EVER.. K
im here if u need to talk
angela

I do look at the negative things first more than the positive things. Most of my family are negative or sarcastic people.
As for what i do when i wake up, Not much..
I stay in my room all day watching movies, computer, video games, music. thats about it. And i don't have a pet anymore because my cat died in January he ment alot to me and that really made me depressed this year most of all than anything. I can't get another cat until i move out on my own. I'm trying to get out on my own but im so afraid of going outside and being around people and having a job and eveyrthing. And my family thinks that im not normal and they don't understand this much and its hard to keep trying to explain myself all the time.... they tell me i should do this and that but i can only do so much without my body freaking out and feeling wierd with this anxiety. Its like i'm in a nightmare or something. Riding in a car is the most thing that scares me because i have flashbacks from that reck since i was the only one hurt. Though my other family members that were in the car got over it and it makes me feel horrible because i can't get over it.
Alot of bad things have happened last year and the begining of this year so i guess locking myself in my room feels safe to me i expect the worst out of everything because of that.

Oh if you know the number to any of the hotlines you were talking about please let me know! thank you both for talking to me.

i written u a post, lets see if they post it. it said it may not appear...

xlostgirlx,

I lost my best friend, my cat TT, five years ago and I still miss him. I really understand your sorrow about your pet. Maybe you can volunteer in a shelter or vet's office. Getting your attention on something else and off of your obsessing really helps, and caring for animals would probably help you in particular.

If that's too much, try taking a short walk. Staying alone in your room is only going to make things worse. I've offered to send you Lucinda's two books if you want them. Learning how to slow your breathing and the relaxation exercises will help stop those panic attacks.

It's hard when your loved ones don't understand. It's always "snap out of it" or "pull yourself up by your bootstraps", isn't it? Here you can talk to other people who suffer from the same things you do, so you don't have to hide or feel ashamed.

Hang in there, sweetie. You wouldn't be here if there wasn't a part of you that wants to feel better. Remember, I'll send you the books at no cost to you if you would like them.
Leslie

sorry they didnt post my posting about the hotlines.. it said it triggered too many words that cant be displayed.. ill figure something out..