Stress Center Peer Support

Howdy all,

I kind of have a problem with facing one of my fears. I know deep down inside that nothing will come of it but it looks like I may need to face before I planned on it. This may get long so sorry if it does.

About seven years ago I was suicidal and in that state of mind I thought my wife and daughter would suffer without me so I was going to take them out also. Well, I'm hoping you can guess that I didnt do anything to myself or my girls! Since that time I have nevr been left alone for more than 12 hours with my daughter. I guess I used my wife as my safe person. Just so you know, our daughter is 18 now. Well, it sounds like my better half may be leaving the state for 3-5 days soon and that would leave me alone with my daughter. It hasn't (to my knoweldge) been on propuse that it hasnt happened before. Ever since everything when down hill I have been afraid that if I "snap" neither of them would be able to control me. I know noting like that will happen but it is starting to cause me to not sleep and then all of those stupid thoughts come rushing thru. Again I know nothing is going to happen, I know everything will be fine. I guess this is a test I wasnt prepared to take on yet. I know that if I tell my wife I dont want her to go she will just to prove to me I'll be fine. I also know that if I dont say anything to her she may stay. With this being one of my HUGE tests to face, what do I do?

How about if your daughter stays over with a friend for the time when you wife is gone? Or maybe you guys (dad and daughter) could take a mini-vacation and go to a hotel and have fun in a water park or something. Fill up your time treasuring your daughter and the relationship that you are able to have with her.

Remember that those terrible thoughts were thoughts and actions are what matters. Let the thought come and go and take deliberate actions.

I'll pray for you.

I think we all have thoughts like that. The fact that you are talking about it proves, I think, that you would never do anything like that. They are just thoughts, that's it. If you feel uncomfortable, bring a 3rd person along for the ride or maybe throw the ol' snowball around ! LOL You'll be fine. If you feel edgy, type away on these boards.